rabenhorst (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rabenhorst) wrote2011-10-24 10:33 pm
rabenhorst) wrote2011-10-24 10:33 pm
[fic] Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi – SJM – Navigate Infinity – Oneshot
Title: Navigate Infinity
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fonulyn
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, Heechul (ninjaing Sungmin, Siwon, Kangin,Han Geng 8D)
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: They first fall in love in ancient Egypt, but it is only the beginning. Through the centuries their paths are inevitably intertwined, while Heechul controls the book of life and death.
Comments: Fordaidetre since she is awesome. Even though she doesn’t even really ship Qmi, she’s in it for the Heechul. This fic started out as a shameless excuse to write Qmi smut (which it kind of still is) but then Heechul happened and somehow it actually even has some resemblance of a plot! \o/
Quote in the beginning taken from Sentenced. I thought it was quite fitting. Also… tons of author’s notes in the end of the fic :(
WARNINGS: contains het! and het smut at that. it’s a reincarnation fic and they live through several lifetimes, in some lifetimes one (or both) of them is a girl! so also genderswitch? yes. oh and to reincarnate they need to die, so character death as well.
is life over, this life's over?
or has it only just begun?
coming apart yet still not done
forever one
(1200 BC Egypt)
Their story begins underneath an acacia tree, in the burning afternoon sun in the midst of hot sand. The times are restless, the pharaoh and a self-proclaimed rival king ruling over parts of the once peaceful empire. No one knows when there will be war, when one ruler will try to overthrow the other, bringing an end to an era.
Kyuhyun is the pharaoh’s favourite slave, even though not many can fathom why. There is something charming in her, with her wide hips and rare smile. She accentuates her large eyes with coal, keeps her hair long enough to reach past her waist, and the rest works by itself. Maybe it’s because she is so different from the other girls in the palace, less refined and elegant, rather filled with raw passion.
Zhou Mi isn’t very high in rank. He knows all the symbols and knows how to count, still replaceable in the long chain of scribes. Still, he gets to work in the palace. He knows how to make himself invisible, to cause as little troubles as possible. When he fades into the background he keeps his eyes open. He knows what is going on better than anyone, better than the pharaoh himself.
Ever since the first day, there was a woman that caught his attention. Night after night he would dip his brush into ink or grab a piece of coal, using a papyrus after another to draw. A seductive smirk on full lips, an inviting look in those dark eyes, the curve of breasts under the colourful necklace.
Zhou Mi never knew, not before that, how it felt to slowly burn alive from the inside.
He never knew how it felt to live a dream either. Not before in the darkness of the night Kyuhyun presses him against a stone wall outside the temple, presses her lush lips on his in a tentative kiss. It’s like opening the floodgates, like unleashing a monster better kept imprisoned.
Ever since then, they yearn for more.
No matter how often they sneak off in the darkness of the night, no matter how often they seek a solitary moment away from everyone else. It is never enough.
The heat makes the scented oils almost burn, makes being inside the palace completely suffocating, and they aren’t the only ones who opt for spending time outside, hoping for a gentle breeze. It’s obvious where to go and when Kyuhyun quickens her steps already from afar, she sees Zhou Mi waiting for her beside the oasis.
Sand tickles Kyuhyun’s bare back as Zhou Mi pushes her down on the ground, hovering above her. There has always been something in that smile, something that makes Kyuhyun’s knees go weak and her stomach flutter. Her skin is wet from the short dive she took, in clear contrast to his, with the pearly droplets of water shining on her.
For once, she stops thinking and instead loses herself in the slow kisses. She shifts her hips when Zhou Mi slides against her, his long fingers brushing over the crease of her thigh. With every touch he burns patterns on her skin, traces stories with his tongue.
Soon Kyuhyun is hot and slick around his fingers when he brings her over the edge, kissing her breathless. Kyuhyun’s fingernails dig deep into the tanned skin of Zhou Mi’s shoulders and she leaves pink scratch marks behind.
Zhou Mi still kisses her, slow and languid, as she spreads her thighs for him.
Four months later, Kyuhyun starts to show. The pharaoh doesn’t take kindly to the rumours spreading like wildfire in the palace. Kyuhyun was essentially reserved for him and he isn’t one to settle for spoiled goods. He doesn’t have to.
Kyuhyun raises her daughter alone, far in the southern part of the kingdom. Zhou Mi never lives to see the birth of his child.
(220 AD Northern Europe)
It’s wrong and they both know it. It’s already wrong of them to speak to one another when they are essentially enemies, when their friends and brothers are killing each other at first sight. They aren’t supposed to become friends. They aren’t supposed to become anything more. They are supposed to aim and shoot, tear each other into pieces, gut each other alive.
Still when Kyuhyun presses his lips on Zhou Mi’s, licks his way into his mouth and kisses him hard, the ongoing disputes are about as far from their minds as possible. They seek shelter from the woods but they know that their hideout isn’t perfect. Nothing is perfect, except for the sensation of bare skin on skin as they press closer together with each movement.
Zhou Mi’s long fingers dance on Kyuhyun’s body, his calloused fingertips brushing down his side and around his waist. The hold he has of him tightens, blunt nails digging into soft flesh hard enough to leave marks, when they rock their bodies together. Kyuhyun rolls his hips slowly, intensely, and nothing has ever felt as good as Zhou Mi hot and hard and ready right against him.
They come gasping into the kiss they share, almost simultaneously. It should be disgusting to fall asleep there, on a bed of moss and pine needles, their cooling release sticky between their stomachs. Zhou Mi shivers when Kyuhyun’s breath puffs against the side of his neck even in sleep, and holds him a little bit tighter.
It’s their dirty little secret. For a while.
Eventually, they are found out. Eventually, Kyuhyun has to face his own brother sentencing him to death. Siwon’s eyes are hard as he looks right past him, as if the years they spent together growing up don’t matter. They don’t, not really. Ever since Kyuhyun first laid his eyes on Zhou Mi and realized he wanted him, he has known how it ends.
The morning air is cool and crisp, the sun lingering at the horizon as if it doesn’t even want to rise. Every step they take makes a sloshing sound as they tread across the swamp. Zhou Mi is exhausted and nearly trips over his own two feet a dozen times before Kyuhyun reaches out and grabs his arm to guide him. They get a stern look but no one says anything so Kyuhyun keeps his hand where it is. The physical contact is somehow reassuring, even if he knows it won’t change a thing.
They know they’re close when the guards stop and order them to go on. Here, the ground is even more wet and they sink into it with each step. Kyuhyun knows it’s only a matter of time, a matter of luck, before the ground completely gives in underneath them and they sink into a bog hole. They don’t deserve a quick and merciful death, but he supposes there are worse things than drowning.
He makes sure to hold on to Zhou Mi till the very end.
(896 AD China)
The flower ships isn’t a place just anyone gets to go to. They are the floating sin, as people call them, the place any man would kill to get to. The stories people tell about the courtesans on those boats are so vivid, so colourful, that Kyuhyun knows not half of it can be true. He still doesn’t really know how he ended up here in the first place. He is a soldier, he is happy with a full meal and a dry bed, and if he gets a curvy woman to warm his sheets he doesn’t ask for more.
It is Kangin’s birthday though and somehow he is one of the persons in the small boat that silently floats through the darkness. The stone walls try to keep people away but they paid three golden coins to the owner of the boat, a dark shady man with feverish eyes. The man said nothing more but told them to be quiet as they stepped on the boat. There are no other sounds but the water splashing.
Slowly their eyes get used to no light and they wait when the man navigates them through the gap in the thick barrier, to the open water. After that, it only takes a few minutes and they already float towards the flower ships, the warm glow of the paper lanterns illuminating their way. It is beautiful, Kyuhyun has to admit that. The stars shine down from the black sky, joyous music surrounding them and making them feel like they’re in a whole new world.
Easily, Kyuhyun heaves himself up on board, ready to defend himself if one of the bulky guards tries anything funny. He knows he’s a paying customer here, though, even if he isn’t certain his pay is anywhere near good enough to afford more than a drink. If he wants a girl… well, he has to ask how much it would be. Right now he simply silently follows Kangin and the others, curiously eyeing his surroundings.
They share drinks and tell jokes, laugh loud and raucous, like anyone else on the boats. Kangin finds a curvy woman within mere minutes, another following soon after and he obviously enjoys the way they giggle to his every joke. There are other girls bringing them drinks and snacks, some just there to play an instrument or to dance. Kyuhyun doesn’t even first notice it when two girls appear to his left, one with a harp on her lap.
Only when the singing starts his head snaps around and he stares at the woman, hypnotized. She is singing softly, barely loud enough to carry above the laughter and the talk, but to Kyuhyun there is nothing else but that. She smiles softly, almost shyly, and there is something in those eyes that holds on to Kyuhyun. When the song ends, she gives him one last lingering look, walking back inside.
It takes three more cups of rice wine before he is courageous enough to go search for that girl. He leaves his friends out on the deck and goes inside, talks to the toothless grandmother sitting by the door. At first she doesn’t know what he means. Finally recognition lights in her eyes and she nods eagerly. Zhou Mi!
When they are alone Zhou Mi isn’t even nearly as shy as she appeared to be outside. Her voice is melodic even when she speaks, her fingers talented as she works Kyuhyun’s clothes open, drops them to the wooden floor planks. Her eyes are still hypnotizing when she looks up and wraps her mouth around Kyuhyun’s erection, the red on her lips smudged. He holds on to the make up table behind him for dear life, tries to remember how to breathe as she swallows around him.
Moments later, Kyuhyun doesn’t do quite as good job with her clothes as he simply rips the wide belt open, allows the dress to fall open to bare her milky white skin, the flat stomach and the round of her breasts. He spins them around and lifts her on the table, urges her to spread her thighs for him. The bottles of lotion and perfume, the jars of different make ups, they all scatter around and fall on the floor but neither of them cares.
Zhou Mi reaches above herself and holds on to the large mirror, her face twisted in pure pleasure. Kyuhyun’s hands are relentless on her hips as he holds her in place, fucks her in deep, intense thrusts. Sweat is beading on skin, the light from the single lantern creating nearly eerie shadows on the walls with its glow.
The scent of her perfume is intoxicating as Kyuhyun buries his face into Zhou Mi’s long neck, her heels digging into his back to guide him in his movements. He lets go and sinks into that hot embrace, slides into that willing body time and time again until he shudders and comes. It feels like another climax right after the first when Zhou Mi’s body tightens around him, a silent curse spilling from her lips. She’s not faking it.
Neither of them sleeps that night. In the early morning hours, Zhou Mi falls asleep. Kyuhyun pulls her close and brushes sweaty strands of hair off her face. He traces her features with his finger.
Before he leaves he sets a bag of coins on the table. He never sees her again.
(1342 AD Europe)
Ever since Kyuhyun met the girl of his dreams he has been working hard to make it work, to be able to provide a future for a family of his own. He comes from the poorer part of the town, not quite the area for the homeless but far from the beautiful houses the rich people own. He shares two rooms with his parents and eleven siblings, used to the constant bickering and noise. For long, he has wanted to leave, to build a life of his own, but ever since that night the want has been burning him alive.
Ever since the night he met Zhou Mi.
So he works, he collects money, he saves. Until he knows he’s ready. He meets Zhou Mi at the usual place just when the sun has set, in the outskirts of town where no one pays attention to them. Zhou Mi has never looked so beautiful, strands of her black hair coming loose from the bun she tied in her neck. Kyuhyun brings his palm to cup Zhou Mi’s jaw, makes her tilt her face up so he can kiss her. Soft and chaste, conveying all the emotion, all the love he carries for her in his heart. She is smiling as he pulls back, but there is a curious sparkle in her deep brown eyes, a questioning line in her raised eyebrow.
When Kyuhyun asks her to marry him, she answers by throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him again.
The wedding is nothing spectacular. They aren’t rich enough to offer a proper meal to any guests, so there’s no one else but Kyuhyun’s parents and his siblings. Zhou Mi’s parents disapprove of their marriage, pretending like she doesn’t exist. It’s easy enough with five other daughters to turn their attention to. None of that matters though. What matters is that they promise the rest of their lives to one another. What matters is the way Kyuhyun’s heart beats stupidly in his chest whenever he looks at Zhou Mi. What matters is the way Zhou Mi’s smile lightens up whenever she’s with Kyuhyun.
Later, Kyuhyun carries Zhou Mi over the threshold. There is nothing but a simple bed and a table, the kitchen lacking in supplies and all of their belongings packed in one trunk. But when Zhou Mi hangs flowery curtains in the small window, the light filtering through the rosy fabric into a warm pool on the floor, it feels like home.
They take their time, take each other in. Kyuhyun feels like he could spend hours just kissing Zhou Mi breathless, mapping routes down her body with his fingers. She laughs as he tickles her, rolls them over and playfully pins him down on the thin straw mattress. The laughter in her eyes is mirrored in his, the smiles on their lips matching.
Eventually the kisses turn longer, the lingering touches burning on their skin. They still tease but in a different way, in a way that makes them yearn for more. She kisses a trail along his shoulder, a low sigh spilling from her reddened lips right against his collar bone, and it makes him shudder helplessly. It feels like their world has narrowed down to just this: the two of them. It’s a slide of skin on skin, a press of body in body, and it’s the best thing that ever happened to them.
Halfway through it Kyuhyun laces their fingers and Zhou Mi squeezes back, never letting go.
(1620 AD France)
Most often, Kyuhyun is happy with his life. He’s had to work to get where he was and thinking of all the other young men he beat in the competition, he feels kind of smug. His skin isn’t perfect, his manners could be more suave, and he certainly isn’t of very noble birth. Still, he is the one who made it this far, to the favourite of the Duchess. Not just any Duchess, either, but the Queen’s loyal entrusted and one of the most influential women in court.
The only downside in his life is the way he is eyed scornfully, how people either dislike him for being snarky and impolite or for being the Duchess’s cheap whore. Except they have no idea how expensive he is in reality. He isn’t going to spend so much time sucking up – sometimes quite literally – to a brainless woman like the Duchess is, not unless he gets something out of it. At the age of twenty-two he already has a manor full of servants, money enough to last for a lifetime, beautiful girls lining up to offer themselves for marriage.
His life is perfect. Until the day they arrive in court.
It’s not the first time for Kyuhyun to be in the royal court and he knows how to behave. There has never been any problem with that and with time he has even learned how to kind of enjoy the dances, the extensive dinners and all the little ticks of their King that affected everyday life. He has some troubles adjusting to the set schedules though, especially the fact that no one gets up from bed before the sun is up high on the sky.
So Kyuhyun takes up having long walks outside in the mornings. He gets up and slips out of bed, helps himself get dressed although technically he should have servants take care of it. He’s found out he’s too impatient for it though and rather laces his own shirt than waits there, wasting precious moments he could spend otherwise. The servants are mostly up and running their errands, but they keep out of his way and he gets to spend his time undisturbed.
Until he runs, quite literally, into a tall courtier one morning. The man obviously doesn’t recognize him as he scrunches up his nose, giving Kyuhyun an evaluating look, only to then scold him for being in that part of the castle instead of doing something productive with his time. It makes Kyuhyun laugh and he laughs even when the man realizes his error and is apologizing profusely.
Surprisingly, that is a start for a weird friendship. Zhou Mi is technically a lot lower in rank than Kyuhyun, but he is the one who runs the show in court. He is the one who sees everything is attended to, effective and always on top of things. Zhou Mi knows how to act in the most unexpected situations and he never seems to lose his cool and his professional smile.
Maybe that is one reason that makes Kyuhyun want to mess him up badly. Zhou Mi is always so goddamn perfect that he wants to see that perfection in disarray, wants to kiss that smile off his lips and mess up that flawless hair with his urgent fingers.
And because he is Kyuhyun, he gets what he wants. Only to find out he likes it even more than he thought he would. He created his own addiction.
They start out almost paranoid, hiding in Zhou Mi’s small room in the servants’ quarters or in the garden, anywhere out of sight and preferably out of earshot as well. With time they get more and more reckless though. Kyuhyun can no longer wait until they are definitely alone, Zhou Mi doesn’t always glance over his shoulder to make sure they’re not being watched.
Like so many times before Zhou Mi has Kyuhyun pinned against the wall, in one of the recesses built into the thick stone walls. Thick brocade and velvet have been hung up everywhere and it’s almost easy to blend into the background. Even though Kyuhyun knows he should have resisted, he merely urges Zhou Mi on, holding his breath as his clothes are worked askew, enough to be out of the way.
Kyuhyun buries his face in Zhou Mi’s neck as those long fingers are wrapped around his arousal, sliding along his cock, teasing the sensitive tip in a way that makes his knees nearly give in underneath him. He grasps the courtier’s shoulders tight, leans heavily against the wall behind him, and wishes for the time to stop altogether. Heat pools in the pit of his stomach and it takes two, three more strokes until he is spilling over, the orgasm shaking him to the core.
After a few heartbeats his breathing has steadied enough for him to surge in for a deep, bruising kiss. Zhou Mi’s lips are reddened from their kisses, his hair mussed up and his eyes gone all-pupil. He looks hungry, and something twitches in Kyuhyun stomach to know what exactly he is yearning for.
He never expected to get into it this deep. This helpless. So much want.
They have used up all of their luck though. Mere moments later a chamber maid spots them there against the wall, shrieks in surprise and drops the tray she’s carrying. It’s enough to alert more servants and soon the corridor is full, people buzzing in and out, guards running to see what the commotion is all about.
Kyuhyun doesn’t care for the tears streaming down the Duchess’s face, he doesn’t care for the ragged sobs and the pleas, the questions. Surprisingly he doesn’t even care for his manor or his future, the plans he had of rising in rank until he could create his own life the way he wants it. He doesn’t even care for his life.
What does him in is the look in Zhou Mi’s eyes just before the executioner swings the sword and detaches that pretty head from those straight shoulders. It isn’t accusation, it isn’t anger, it isn’t even sadness. Kyuhyun doesn’t even remember when he last cried, and now he hardly registers his cheeks getting damp with big salty tears rolling down them.
Kyuhyun closes his eyes as he waits for the pain, comforting himself with that one last look. Then everything goes black.
(1816 AD England)
The ballroom is full of beautiful women and handsome men, some dancing and some conversing, the music filling the space effortlessly. Kyuhyun feels quite self conscious in her pale blue dress, the cut quite low and laced so tight it makes it harder to breathe. Her fiancé compliments her and she offers him a polite smile, while inwardly she thinks he can go to hell. This was an arranged marriage to begin with and she has never really appreciated the man. He has no brains to speak of, and Kyuhyun finds it infuriating.
It all begins from a pair of diamond earrings. They catch Kyuhyun’s attention from across the room, flickering in the light and her first thought is that she wouldn’t mind having such a beautiful piece of jewellery either. Then her gaze shifts from the diamond to the long, white neck, to the line of jaw. She doesn’t even realize she is staring, not before a pair of dark eyes meets her own, something playful and amused flickering in those depths.
Almost too easily Kyuhyun ditches her husband-to-be and tells him she needs something to drink, making her way towards the dark haired beauty on the side of the dance floor. The next few hours they spend just talking to one another, first interrupted by requests to dance before they slip away to sit in a dim staircase. Distantly they can hear the music and the chattering from a few rooms away, but they pay no mind to it.
Kyuhyun doesn’t really know when she notices something is different. When she realizes that Zhou Mi’s hand lingers on her knee a little longer than necessary, when she realizes she keeps on staring at Zhou Mi’s rosy lips while she speaks. She is the one who leans in and captures Zhou Mi’s lips with her own, but Zhou Mi is the one who drags her on her feet and up the stairs.
Their dresses rustle as they fall down on the bed, Kyuhyun on top of Zhou Mi. The laughter that bubbles from Zhou Mi is contagious and soon they’re both smiling into the kisses, pressing their faces close together. Impatiently Kyuhyun is tugging on the corsage Zhou Mi is wearing, trying to free her from the frilly dress with way too many layers. Her heart is beating like a drum and she doesn’t know why her hands aren’t shaking more than this.
Soon enough, Kyuhyun has her hand between Zhou Mi’s legs and she takes delight in the high pitched sigh she manages to elicit from her. Zhou Mi’s lips fall open, a pink tongue darting out to lick the corner of her mouth. That has got to be the most exciting thing Kyuhyun has ever seen, and it sends her blood rushing to her lower body. She has touched herself often enough to know what feels good, fingering Zhou Mi until she comes with a gasp against her neck.
They take only a moment to catch their breath. Then, in a swift movement Zhou Mi rolls them over until she has Kyuhyun pinned against the mattress. She grins as she pushes Kyuhyun’s legs up, slides her fingers along her bare thighs. She ignores the socks Kyuhyun is wearing, ignores the high heels and the silky dress. Instead she teases her for not wearing anything underneath.
There are no tangible words to describe the way Kyuhyun’s head spins, the way she can hardly inhale as she rests back on the bed, her curly hair sprawled on the pillows like a waterfall. Kyuhyun shudders when Zhou Mi traces a path up her thigh with her tongue, dipping between her legs.
It should be awkward, it should feel wrong, they should be ashamed of themselves. Instead, Kyuhyun pushes her fingers into the silky strands of Zhou Mi’s hair and pulls her closer, eagerly lifting her hips to wordlessly show what she wants. The dress pools around her waist as she wraps her legs loosely around Zhou Mi’s neck.
Mere seconds later Kyuhyun could swear she has never felt this good in her life. Her body arches off the bed forcibly, her thighs trembling as she fights to keep them apart. The hot, wet mouth is teasing her just right, and a distant part of her wonders where Zhou Mi learned all these tricks. She fists her hands into the sheets and pulls on them hard, sobbing out a ragged plea.
She shudders against Zhou Mi’s tongue, her breath coming in short gasps as she comes undone.
Zhou Mi doesn’t stop. By the time she pulls back Kyuhyun is a whimpering, panting mess and has climaxed three times against her. It is kind of disgusting how sweat glues her dress on her skin and how it makes her shiver as it cools down, but she can’t really bring herself to care. She pushes the mess of dark brown hair out of her eyes and surges in to kiss Zhou Mi.
The way she tastes herself on Zhou Mi’s tongue makes the lust flare up again. She nearly tackles her as she tries to get as close as possible.
Once they get their clothes off the real fun begins.
Three days after that Zhou Mi gets married. Kyuhyun is invited to the wedding. No one doubts anything as she volunteers to help Zhou Mi prepare for the ceremony, alone. If Zhou Mi’s cheeks are flushed when she repeats her wows, they all think it’s because she’s so happy on her big day, not because Kyuhyun got her off mere minutes prior.
Zhou Mi swears she will return the favour when Kyuhyun gets married two months later. She does.
It’s not the end of it.
(1914 AD Japan)
The worst thing is the insecurity. They know they will have to leave one day, soon. They know there is no way to avoid the war and their duty, and they aren’t going to even try. Still it would be easier to have a set date when they are going, a certain day when it all begins. It would be better than waiting, guessing how long it’ll be, living in a complete standstill. One couldn’t even really call it living.
Already days ago Kyuhyun has left his home, abandoned it to share the small one room apartment with Zhou Mi instead. At times like this when nothing is certain they agree that every single second they get to spend together counts. They hardly even go outside. There’s nothing there, not for them. Instead they spend endless hours together: they play cards in candlelight, they read the old worn books in the morning before they get up from bed, they write silly poems while they drink tasteless tea, they sing and make their voices blend in an endless variety of songs from their childhood.
The days are better. The nights, they cling on to each other. It’s easier to lose themselves in the hot kisses and feverish touches, forget about the inevitable for a few precious hours. Zhou Mi shudders when Kyuhyun traces a hot tongue down his stomach, scrapes his teeth down on his hipbone hard enough to bruise. He tangles his fingers in those nearly black strands of hair, never urging despite the possessiveness in the gesture.
He only lets go when Kyuhyun crawls closer, straddles his hips and leans down to kiss him hard. Again, he guides the younger man in his movements. Kyuhyun is fingering himself and Zhou Mi reaches behind him, sliding his middle finger in as well. The gasp that falls from Kyuhyun’s full lips at that is already enough to make a person undone and Zhou Mi bites the insides of his cheeks hard enough to hurt just to stay focused.
Everything else is forgotten when Kyuhyun sinks down on Zhou Mi, takes him in to the hilt slow enough to make them both hold their breath. He rides Zhou Mi in deep rolls of his hips, grinding against him time and time again until they’re shuddering with the intensity of the sensations. Kyuhyun is the one who loses it first, tensing as he comes hard between their bodies. Zhou Mi uses the moment to flip them around and fucks him hard until he reaches his own climax.
It’s impossible to miss the way Kyuhyun’s looks at him right after, his arms curling around Zhou Mi to pull him close. Kyuhyun, Zhou Mi whispers, soft as he mouths the other man’s collarbone, mine.
Even when the morning comes, it’s dark. It seems like the sun never really shines these days, like the whole world is dimmed, every colour muted. Kyuhyun is resting his head on Zhou Mi’s shoulder as he traces a pattern on his chest with his fingers. He tells him he doesn’t really want to go. He wishes they could just stay here forever. Zhou Mi agrees.
Three days later their general tells them they’re being sent to Qingdao. This is the perfect opportunity to take over large areas of China and they can’t pass it by. It’s their emperor’s will, which means it’s the will of the gods, the heavens, all the higher powers on earth. They are cold, they are hungry, they are scared. They are also here to fulfil their duty to their country and one can see the determination in the set of their jaw, in the stern look in their eyes.
Not a single man came here to die, they came here to live.
They write letters. They never send them. Zhou Mi knows that he can’t get the letters to another soldier, not even knowing where Kyuhyun is right now. Still he writes him whenever he can, tucks the envelopes neatly away into the side pocket of his bag and hopes he can once give them to Kyuhyun. He counts days until this is over, escapes the bloody reality into his head where all he can hear is Kyuhyun’s voice, Kyuhyun’s breathing, Kyuhyun. When he closes his eyes he remembers that night.
Somehow he gets through the war. Finally, he gets to go back home, back to his parents and his younger brother. He begins to search for Kyuhyun. He asks everyone he can think of, he sends letters, he clings on to every little bit of information.
Until he hears that only three weeks after they parted, Kyuhyun’s squad had been caught in the middle of a German unit. They had escaped and hidden in a bunker, but it hadn’t been enough to shelter them. Not from mustard gas.
Later, Zhou Mi meets Kyuhyun’s sister. She hands him three unopened letters, all of which have his name scribbled across the envelope. It takes him months to finally open the first one.
(2011 AD Korea)
Kyuhyun isn’t going to turn hamburgers for a living for much longer, anymore, but he is quite glad he works in this particular burger joint when a tall, gorgeous customer walks in. A tall, gorgeous customer he so happens to know as they’ve taken the same lectures, before. It would be a lie not to admit that ever since Kyuhyun has been quite interested, and seeing the object of his desires here, now, when there are practically no customers, is pretty much perfect.
Two hours later the place closes but Kyuhyun doesn’t even make it to the door to flip the sign from open to closed. Zhou Mi isn’t really the type to go for one night stands, he has higher standards than that, so he can’t explain what happened to get them to this point, either. It’s the first time either of them has sex in the back of a burger place, surrounded by dough rolls and flour and the stench of grease from the meat. Not exactly the most romantic setting, but Kyuhyun has Zhou Mi bent over the counter faster than he can even blink.
It’s a first date to remember. They’ll tell their friends later and laugh, fully aware of how desperate they sound.
It might start as a one night stand but it doesn’t end as one. The next day Kyuhyun appears on Zhou Mi’s doorstep, having blackmailed his address from a common friend of theirs. He holds out the box of takeout – no burgers, promised – like an offering and asks if he can come in. Zhou Mi smiles a little wider and holds the door open for him.
Not that they’d end up eating the takeout. The food cools down on the table as they fuck on the deformed couch, the squeaks of the springs loud enough to wake the dead. Hours later they re-heat the food and sit on the same couch, shoulder against shoulder, watching a dumb sitcom neither pays much attention to. Kyuhyun is more focused on sneaking glances at Zhou Mi’s profile, and the way his lips curve to a happy smile. Zhou Mi is more focused on the way Kyuhyun’s thigh presses against his own, how his body warmth seeps through thin layers of clothing.
With time, they learn to take it slow. They spend a night just sleeping right next to one another more often than not. They spend hours outside sitting on the rooftop watching the stars up above. They spend Kyuhyun’s break at work making out behind the soda machine. They spend slow Sunday mornings on the couch watching cartoons and eating cereal.
They spend time together. As much as they can.
It’s almost two years later, on a cold winter morning, that Kyuhyun realizes he is happy. The window is open and the cool breeze blows inside, makes the curtains flap in their hold. He can’t be bothered to get up though and instead he kisses a line down Zhou Mi’s upper arm, teasingly tonguing his elbow. Zhou Mi is as ticklish as ever and wakes up squirming, weakly batting at the other man to let go of him and leave him alone.
Soon enough Kyuhyun licks his way into Zhou Mi’s mouth instead, relishing in the sleepy moan that he gains as a reward. He slides the covers to the floor while shifting closer but neither of them even really realizes how cold it is in their bedroom. Kyuhyun can barely hear the sounds of the traffic through the rushing of blood in his ears as he traces his teeth down Zhou Mi’s spine, admires the arch of his bent back.
Only when Zhou Mi’s arms are shaking from the effort of keeping himself upright, his thighs tense not to part them further, Kyuhyun rewards him with what they both wanted already hours ago. He bites down on Zhou Mi’s shoulder blade as he sinks into his body in one fluent movement of his hips, his long fingers curling around Zhou Mi’s thighs. He holds on tight enough to leave bruises. A part of him likes that, likes to mark Zhou Mi as his own.
Eventually he comes with a murmur of Zhou Mi’s name against the nape of the other man’s neck. That’s exactly what does Zhou Mi in and he trembles from head to toe with the force of his own climax. It almost feels like it’ll never end, and with a soft whimper he falls into the mattress.
What they both enjoy the most, though, is the way they fall back asleep, long limbs tangled together and keeping each other warm. The last thing Kyuhyun hears before he drifts off is the steady beat of Zhou Mi’s heart.
---
exactly 7500 words.
Thank you to everyone who helped me with this! My little brother deserves a special mention. He wanted me to include the mustard gas and listened to me whine and kicked my ass repeatedly. Also mentioning Becky (repeatedly) and @nashirah (don’t know if you have a lj?) thank you bbs~♥
Also this fic had tons of alternate names. For example becky is getting seriously annoyed with the lack of hanchul sex or this was meant to be qmi, but then heechul happened.
/after eight hours of thinking
me: I still don't have a title
becky: oh my god marjo what's wrong with you
I NEEDED HELP FROM FOUR PERSONS FOR THE TITLE.
This was meant to be a lame excuse for tons of Qmi smut and then somehow Heechul happened :| idk how he keeps on intruding my fics, that bastard. Becky says it’s because I’m a closet petal but…
ALSO I NEVER MEANT TO WRITE HET OR GENDERSWAP D:and it was so HARD esp since in finnish we make no difference between he and she and oh god idk what happened. …or I do know, tiredness and random ideas and Heechul happened.
I need a shirt with but then Heechul happened.
I’m blathering forgive me I shut up now. BANANAS.
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Author:
fonulynRating: NC17
Pairing: Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, Heechul (ninjaing Sungmin, Siwon, Kangin,
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: They first fall in love in ancient Egypt, but it is only the beginning. Through the centuries their paths are inevitably intertwined, while Heechul controls the book of life and death.
Comments: For
daidetre since she is awesome. Even though she doesn’t even really ship Qmi, she’s in it for the Heechul. This fic started out as a shameless excuse to write Qmi smut (which it kind of still is) but then Heechul happened and somehow it actually even has some resemblance of a plot! \o/Quote in the beginning taken from Sentenced. I thought it was quite fitting. Also… tons of author’s notes in the end of the fic :(
WARNINGS: contains het! and het smut at that. it’s a reincarnation fic and they live through several lifetimes, in some lifetimes one (or both) of them is a girl! so also genderswitch? yes. oh and to reincarnate they need to die, so character death as well.
is life over, this life's over?
or has it only just begun?
coming apart yet still not done
forever one
(1200 BC Egypt)
Their story begins underneath an acacia tree, in the burning afternoon sun in the midst of hot sand. The times are restless, the pharaoh and a self-proclaimed rival king ruling over parts of the once peaceful empire. No one knows when there will be war, when one ruler will try to overthrow the other, bringing an end to an era.
Kyuhyun is the pharaoh’s favourite slave, even though not many can fathom why. There is something charming in her, with her wide hips and rare smile. She accentuates her large eyes with coal, keeps her hair long enough to reach past her waist, and the rest works by itself. Maybe it’s because she is so different from the other girls in the palace, less refined and elegant, rather filled with raw passion.
Zhou Mi isn’t very high in rank. He knows all the symbols and knows how to count, still replaceable in the long chain of scribes. Still, he gets to work in the palace. He knows how to make himself invisible, to cause as little troubles as possible. When he fades into the background he keeps his eyes open. He knows what is going on better than anyone, better than the pharaoh himself.
Ever since the first day, there was a woman that caught his attention. Night after night he would dip his brush into ink or grab a piece of coal, using a papyrus after another to draw. A seductive smirk on full lips, an inviting look in those dark eyes, the curve of breasts under the colourful necklace.
Zhou Mi never knew, not before that, how it felt to slowly burn alive from the inside.
He never knew how it felt to live a dream either. Not before in the darkness of the night Kyuhyun presses him against a stone wall outside the temple, presses her lush lips on his in a tentative kiss. It’s like opening the floodgates, like unleashing a monster better kept imprisoned.
Ever since then, they yearn for more.
No matter how often they sneak off in the darkness of the night, no matter how often they seek a solitary moment away from everyone else. It is never enough.
The heat makes the scented oils almost burn, makes being inside the palace completely suffocating, and they aren’t the only ones who opt for spending time outside, hoping for a gentle breeze. It’s obvious where to go and when Kyuhyun quickens her steps already from afar, she sees Zhou Mi waiting for her beside the oasis.
Sand tickles Kyuhyun’s bare back as Zhou Mi pushes her down on the ground, hovering above her. There has always been something in that smile, something that makes Kyuhyun’s knees go weak and her stomach flutter. Her skin is wet from the short dive she took, in clear contrast to his, with the pearly droplets of water shining on her.
For once, she stops thinking and instead loses herself in the slow kisses. She shifts her hips when Zhou Mi slides against her, his long fingers brushing over the crease of her thigh. With every touch he burns patterns on her skin, traces stories with his tongue.
Soon Kyuhyun is hot and slick around his fingers when he brings her over the edge, kissing her breathless. Kyuhyun’s fingernails dig deep into the tanned skin of Zhou Mi’s shoulders and she leaves pink scratch marks behind.
Zhou Mi still kisses her, slow and languid, as she spreads her thighs for him.
Four months later, Kyuhyun starts to show. The pharaoh doesn’t take kindly to the rumours spreading like wildfire in the palace. Kyuhyun was essentially reserved for him and he isn’t one to settle for spoiled goods. He doesn’t have to.
Kyuhyun raises her daughter alone, far in the southern part of the kingdom. Zhou Mi never lives to see the birth of his child.
Heechul watches all that with a mixture of amusement, excitement and maybe a slight hint of melancholy. Maybe he doesn’t watch it in the literal sense of the word since how could he focus on a single human being when he is the one responsible for everyone living on this earth. He is constantly aware of every soul under his supervision though, every single one of them. And he has taken quite a liking to these two.
This isn’t their first life, not even though this is the first life where they manage to actually get together. In their previous lives they have passed each other, their lives brushing and then bouncing off one another without ever joining. But Heechul knows about the possibilities. He knows what could become of it, of anyone’s fate. So he lets them meet this time.
Heechul isn’t sad when he watches Zhou Mi die. His favourite human being or not, it doesn’t matter. Death isn’t the end of anything. It is more a door to another existence. Some souls are nearly catapulted through the door into their next lives right at the moment of their death. Some souls linger in the doorframe for hundreds of years before Heechul finds them another destiny.
It’s all a matter of organization and Heechul knows he holds all the strings in his hands. He takes the book bound in flesh and written in blood, traces another lifeline on the wretched pages and sets the fate for another child that draws its first breath somewhere in the world.
His mind is already on Zhou Mi. And Kyuhyun. And where he will make them live their lives next.
Yes, Heechul plays favourites. He has weird ways of showing it, though.
(220 AD Northern Europe)
It’s wrong and they both know it. It’s already wrong of them to speak to one another when they are essentially enemies, when their friends and brothers are killing each other at first sight. They aren’t supposed to become friends. They aren’t supposed to become anything more. They are supposed to aim and shoot, tear each other into pieces, gut each other alive.
Still when Kyuhyun presses his lips on Zhou Mi’s, licks his way into his mouth and kisses him hard, the ongoing disputes are about as far from their minds as possible. They seek shelter from the woods but they know that their hideout isn’t perfect. Nothing is perfect, except for the sensation of bare skin on skin as they press closer together with each movement.
Zhou Mi’s long fingers dance on Kyuhyun’s body, his calloused fingertips brushing down his side and around his waist. The hold he has of him tightens, blunt nails digging into soft flesh hard enough to leave marks, when they rock their bodies together. Kyuhyun rolls his hips slowly, intensely, and nothing has ever felt as good as Zhou Mi hot and hard and ready right against him.
They come gasping into the kiss they share, almost simultaneously. It should be disgusting to fall asleep there, on a bed of moss and pine needles, their cooling release sticky between their stomachs. Zhou Mi shivers when Kyuhyun’s breath puffs against the side of his neck even in sleep, and holds him a little bit tighter.
It’s their dirty little secret. For a while.
Eventually, they are found out. Eventually, Kyuhyun has to face his own brother sentencing him to death. Siwon’s eyes are hard as he looks right past him, as if the years they spent together growing up don’t matter. They don’t, not really. Ever since Kyuhyun first laid his eyes on Zhou Mi and realized he wanted him, he has known how it ends.
The morning air is cool and crisp, the sun lingering at the horizon as if it doesn’t even want to rise. Every step they take makes a sloshing sound as they tread across the swamp. Zhou Mi is exhausted and nearly trips over his own two feet a dozen times before Kyuhyun reaches out and grabs his arm to guide him. They get a stern look but no one says anything so Kyuhyun keeps his hand where it is. The physical contact is somehow reassuring, even if he knows it won’t change a thing.
They know they’re close when the guards stop and order them to go on. Here, the ground is even more wet and they sink into it with each step. Kyuhyun knows it’s only a matter of time, a matter of luck, before the ground completely gives in underneath them and they sink into a bog hole. They don’t deserve a quick and merciful death, but he supposes there are worse things than drowning.
He makes sure to hold on to Zhou Mi till the very end.
Almost two thousand years later their bodies are found perfectly mummified, their arms still wrapped around one another. Heechul planned all that, of course. Habitually he ties up all loose ends.
Heechul also has this habit of talking about his favourite humans to anyone who will listen. It isn’t really that many, not when his interactions are limited to meeting the god of the natural order every once in a while, the one who makes sure the winter comes and the plants grow and all this shit that never really interested Heechul much. Sungmin is alright though, and has this same dry humour that quite entertains Heechul at times.
Lately, Heechul has only talked about Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi. Of course their names aren’t always Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi, they are born into different lives and different centuries, different worlds altogether. Heechul doesn’t see any sense in making things complicated though. He settles for a name and consistently uses the same name of the same soul. Can souls have names? If Heechul says so, they can.
Sungmin seems quite interested in this particular pair of humans too, more interested than he has been before. He even might bring them up himself, occasionally. Heechul kind of enjoys that. He enjoys it so much that when Sungmin suggests them a fate, he makes it happen. This could turn out to be interesting…
(896 AD China)
The flower ships isn’t a place just anyone gets to go to. They are the floating sin, as people call them, the place any man would kill to get to. The stories people tell about the courtesans on those boats are so vivid, so colourful, that Kyuhyun knows not half of it can be true. He still doesn’t really know how he ended up here in the first place. He is a soldier, he is happy with a full meal and a dry bed, and if he gets a curvy woman to warm his sheets he doesn’t ask for more.
It is Kangin’s birthday though and somehow he is one of the persons in the small boat that silently floats through the darkness. The stone walls try to keep people away but they paid three golden coins to the owner of the boat, a dark shady man with feverish eyes. The man said nothing more but told them to be quiet as they stepped on the boat. There are no other sounds but the water splashing.
Slowly their eyes get used to no light and they wait when the man navigates them through the gap in the thick barrier, to the open water. After that, it only takes a few minutes and they already float towards the flower ships, the warm glow of the paper lanterns illuminating their way. It is beautiful, Kyuhyun has to admit that. The stars shine down from the black sky, joyous music surrounding them and making them feel like they’re in a whole new world.
Easily, Kyuhyun heaves himself up on board, ready to defend himself if one of the bulky guards tries anything funny. He knows he’s a paying customer here, though, even if he isn’t certain his pay is anywhere near good enough to afford more than a drink. If he wants a girl… well, he has to ask how much it would be. Right now he simply silently follows Kangin and the others, curiously eyeing his surroundings.
They share drinks and tell jokes, laugh loud and raucous, like anyone else on the boats. Kangin finds a curvy woman within mere minutes, another following soon after and he obviously enjoys the way they giggle to his every joke. There are other girls bringing them drinks and snacks, some just there to play an instrument or to dance. Kyuhyun doesn’t even first notice it when two girls appear to his left, one with a harp on her lap.
Only when the singing starts his head snaps around and he stares at the woman, hypnotized. She is singing softly, barely loud enough to carry above the laughter and the talk, but to Kyuhyun there is nothing else but that. She smiles softly, almost shyly, and there is something in those eyes that holds on to Kyuhyun. When the song ends, she gives him one last lingering look, walking back inside.
It takes three more cups of rice wine before he is courageous enough to go search for that girl. He leaves his friends out on the deck and goes inside, talks to the toothless grandmother sitting by the door. At first she doesn’t know what he means. Finally recognition lights in her eyes and she nods eagerly. Zhou Mi!
When they are alone Zhou Mi isn’t even nearly as shy as she appeared to be outside. Her voice is melodic even when she speaks, her fingers talented as she works Kyuhyun’s clothes open, drops them to the wooden floor planks. Her eyes are still hypnotizing when she looks up and wraps her mouth around Kyuhyun’s erection, the red on her lips smudged. He holds on to the make up table behind him for dear life, tries to remember how to breathe as she swallows around him.
Moments later, Kyuhyun doesn’t do quite as good job with her clothes as he simply rips the wide belt open, allows the dress to fall open to bare her milky white skin, the flat stomach and the round of her breasts. He spins them around and lifts her on the table, urges her to spread her thighs for him. The bottles of lotion and perfume, the jars of different make ups, they all scatter around and fall on the floor but neither of them cares.
Zhou Mi reaches above herself and holds on to the large mirror, her face twisted in pure pleasure. Kyuhyun’s hands are relentless on her hips as he holds her in place, fucks her in deep, intense thrusts. Sweat is beading on skin, the light from the single lantern creating nearly eerie shadows on the walls with its glow.
The scent of her perfume is intoxicating as Kyuhyun buries his face into Zhou Mi’s long neck, her heels digging into his back to guide him in his movements. He lets go and sinks into that hot embrace, slides into that willing body time and time again until he shudders and comes. It feels like another climax right after the first when Zhou Mi’s body tightens around him, a silent curse spilling from her lips. She’s not faking it.
Neither of them sleeps that night. In the early morning hours, Zhou Mi falls asleep. Kyuhyun pulls her close and brushes sweaty strands of hair off her face. He traces her features with his finger.
Before he leaves he sets a bag of coins on the table. He never sees her again.
Heechul lets their souls wait for the next reincarnation for a good while, since his attention is momentarily captured by another couple that has always been high in his favourites. Ever since the beginning he has been following them and it has been almost as much fun as Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi. Somehow he gets quite attached to some of his humans, and the fact that he handles billions of souls has never gotten in the way of that.
He almost misses the way Kyuhyun finally marries a suitable girl and lives unhappy for the rest of his life, his thoughts always returning to a certain courtesan, to a lithe body against his own and long legs around his hips. Heechul doesn’t blame him, especially not knowing how timid and colourless the wife is. Zhou Mi’s fate is less dull, but the stormy path ends quite early even in human years.
Maybe the two of them deserve something happier for their next life, Heechul thinks as he finally collects Kyuhyun’s soul after eighty-two years on the earth. He needs to give it a good thought this time.
(1342 AD Europe)
Ever since Kyuhyun met the girl of his dreams he has been working hard to make it work, to be able to provide a future for a family of his own. He comes from the poorer part of the town, not quite the area for the homeless but far from the beautiful houses the rich people own. He shares two rooms with his parents and eleven siblings, used to the constant bickering and noise. For long, he has wanted to leave, to build a life of his own, but ever since that night the want has been burning him alive.
Ever since the night he met Zhou Mi.
So he works, he collects money, he saves. Until he knows he’s ready. He meets Zhou Mi at the usual place just when the sun has set, in the outskirts of town where no one pays attention to them. Zhou Mi has never looked so beautiful, strands of her black hair coming loose from the bun she tied in her neck. Kyuhyun brings his palm to cup Zhou Mi’s jaw, makes her tilt her face up so he can kiss her. Soft and chaste, conveying all the emotion, all the love he carries for her in his heart. She is smiling as he pulls back, but there is a curious sparkle in her deep brown eyes, a questioning line in her raised eyebrow.
When Kyuhyun asks her to marry him, she answers by throwing her arms around his neck and kissing him again.
The wedding is nothing spectacular. They aren’t rich enough to offer a proper meal to any guests, so there’s no one else but Kyuhyun’s parents and his siblings. Zhou Mi’s parents disapprove of their marriage, pretending like she doesn’t exist. It’s easy enough with five other daughters to turn their attention to. None of that matters though. What matters is that they promise the rest of their lives to one another. What matters is the way Kyuhyun’s heart beats stupidly in his chest whenever he looks at Zhou Mi. What matters is the way Zhou Mi’s smile lightens up whenever she’s with Kyuhyun.
Later, Kyuhyun carries Zhou Mi over the threshold. There is nothing but a simple bed and a table, the kitchen lacking in supplies and all of their belongings packed in one trunk. But when Zhou Mi hangs flowery curtains in the small window, the light filtering through the rosy fabric into a warm pool on the floor, it feels like home.
They take their time, take each other in. Kyuhyun feels like he could spend hours just kissing Zhou Mi breathless, mapping routes down her body with his fingers. She laughs as he tickles her, rolls them over and playfully pins him down on the thin straw mattress. The laughter in her eyes is mirrored in his, the smiles on their lips matching.
Eventually the kisses turn longer, the lingering touches burning on their skin. They still tease but in a different way, in a way that makes them yearn for more. She kisses a trail along his shoulder, a low sigh spilling from her reddened lips right against his collar bone, and it makes him shudder helplessly. It feels like their world has narrowed down to just this: the two of them. It’s a slide of skin on skin, a press of body in body, and it’s the best thing that ever happened to them.
Halfway through it Kyuhyun laces their fingers and Zhou Mi squeezes back, never letting go.
This almost looks like a happy ending for them. Heechul is satisfied and diverts his attention to his other favourite humans, planning a new life for a man he knows is dying anytime now. He is content until he brings in the Black Death on 1347, completely forgetting one certain happy little family. He only remembers the two when he collects Zhou Mi’s soul along with the soul of their unborn child.
Oh well. Better luck next time.
(1620 AD France)
Most often, Kyuhyun is happy with his life. He’s had to work to get where he was and thinking of all the other young men he beat in the competition, he feels kind of smug. His skin isn’t perfect, his manners could be more suave, and he certainly isn’t of very noble birth. Still, he is the one who made it this far, to the favourite of the Duchess. Not just any Duchess, either, but the Queen’s loyal entrusted and one of the most influential women in court.
The only downside in his life is the way he is eyed scornfully, how people either dislike him for being snarky and impolite or for being the Duchess’s cheap whore. Except they have no idea how expensive he is in reality. He isn’t going to spend so much time sucking up – sometimes quite literally – to a brainless woman like the Duchess is, not unless he gets something out of it. At the age of twenty-two he already has a manor full of servants, money enough to last for a lifetime, beautiful girls lining up to offer themselves for marriage.
His life is perfect. Until the day they arrive in court.
It’s not the first time for Kyuhyun to be in the royal court and he knows how to behave. There has never been any problem with that and with time he has even learned how to kind of enjoy the dances, the extensive dinners and all the little ticks of their King that affected everyday life. He has some troubles adjusting to the set schedules though, especially the fact that no one gets up from bed before the sun is up high on the sky.
So Kyuhyun takes up having long walks outside in the mornings. He gets up and slips out of bed, helps himself get dressed although technically he should have servants take care of it. He’s found out he’s too impatient for it though and rather laces his own shirt than waits there, wasting precious moments he could spend otherwise. The servants are mostly up and running their errands, but they keep out of his way and he gets to spend his time undisturbed.
Until he runs, quite literally, into a tall courtier one morning. The man obviously doesn’t recognize him as he scrunches up his nose, giving Kyuhyun an evaluating look, only to then scold him for being in that part of the castle instead of doing something productive with his time. It makes Kyuhyun laugh and he laughs even when the man realizes his error and is apologizing profusely.
Surprisingly, that is a start for a weird friendship. Zhou Mi is technically a lot lower in rank than Kyuhyun, but he is the one who runs the show in court. He is the one who sees everything is attended to, effective and always on top of things. Zhou Mi knows how to act in the most unexpected situations and he never seems to lose his cool and his professional smile.
Maybe that is one reason that makes Kyuhyun want to mess him up badly. Zhou Mi is always so goddamn perfect that he wants to see that perfection in disarray, wants to kiss that smile off his lips and mess up that flawless hair with his urgent fingers.
And because he is Kyuhyun, he gets what he wants. Only to find out he likes it even more than he thought he would. He created his own addiction.
They start out almost paranoid, hiding in Zhou Mi’s small room in the servants’ quarters or in the garden, anywhere out of sight and preferably out of earshot as well. With time they get more and more reckless though. Kyuhyun can no longer wait until they are definitely alone, Zhou Mi doesn’t always glance over his shoulder to make sure they’re not being watched.
Like so many times before Zhou Mi has Kyuhyun pinned against the wall, in one of the recesses built into the thick stone walls. Thick brocade and velvet have been hung up everywhere and it’s almost easy to blend into the background. Even though Kyuhyun knows he should have resisted, he merely urges Zhou Mi on, holding his breath as his clothes are worked askew, enough to be out of the way.
Kyuhyun buries his face in Zhou Mi’s neck as those long fingers are wrapped around his arousal, sliding along his cock, teasing the sensitive tip in a way that makes his knees nearly give in underneath him. He grasps the courtier’s shoulders tight, leans heavily against the wall behind him, and wishes for the time to stop altogether. Heat pools in the pit of his stomach and it takes two, three more strokes until he is spilling over, the orgasm shaking him to the core.
After a few heartbeats his breathing has steadied enough for him to surge in for a deep, bruising kiss. Zhou Mi’s lips are reddened from their kisses, his hair mussed up and his eyes gone all-pupil. He looks hungry, and something twitches in Kyuhyun stomach to know what exactly he is yearning for.
He never expected to get into it this deep. This helpless. So much want.
They have used up all of their luck though. Mere moments later a chamber maid spots them there against the wall, shrieks in surprise and drops the tray she’s carrying. It’s enough to alert more servants and soon the corridor is full, people buzzing in and out, guards running to see what the commotion is all about.
Kyuhyun doesn’t care for the tears streaming down the Duchess’s face, he doesn’t care for the ragged sobs and the pleas, the questions. Surprisingly he doesn’t even care for his manor or his future, the plans he had of rising in rank until he could create his own life the way he wants it. He doesn’t even care for his life.
What does him in is the look in Zhou Mi’s eyes just before the executioner swings the sword and detaches that pretty head from those straight shoulders. It isn’t accusation, it isn’t anger, it isn’t even sadness. Kyuhyun doesn’t even remember when he last cried, and now he hardly registers his cheeks getting damp with big salty tears rolling down them.
Kyuhyun closes his eyes as he waits for the pain, comforting himself with that one last look. Then everything goes black.
Sometimes Heechul almost feels sorry for his favourite humans. Only almost though. He doesn’t really feel the need for any unnecessary angsting, not when he knows there will be plenty of lives to follow. Every soul is in an unending cycle of lives, dying and being born again, so to him death isn’t such a big deal.
If one life is sad, another will be happier. At least in general.
Thoughtfully Heechul slides his fingers across the worn pages of the book that mark the past, the things already happened. He doesn’t need to look at them, he remembers it all by heart. He only needs to see a soul and he knows all the lives it’s been through. Usually he knows all the lives it will be through, as well. But sometimes he likes to get creative. Sometimes he likes to mix things up a bit and have his fun.
His existence would get pretty damn dull otherwise. What’s the point in having power over life and death if you don’t use it?
(1816 AD England)
The ballroom is full of beautiful women and handsome men, some dancing and some conversing, the music filling the space effortlessly. Kyuhyun feels quite self conscious in her pale blue dress, the cut quite low and laced so tight it makes it harder to breathe. Her fiancé compliments her and she offers him a polite smile, while inwardly she thinks he can go to hell. This was an arranged marriage to begin with and she has never really appreciated the man. He has no brains to speak of, and Kyuhyun finds it infuriating.
It all begins from a pair of diamond earrings. They catch Kyuhyun’s attention from across the room, flickering in the light and her first thought is that she wouldn’t mind having such a beautiful piece of jewellery either. Then her gaze shifts from the diamond to the long, white neck, to the line of jaw. She doesn’t even realize she is staring, not before a pair of dark eyes meets her own, something playful and amused flickering in those depths.
Almost too easily Kyuhyun ditches her husband-to-be and tells him she needs something to drink, making her way towards the dark haired beauty on the side of the dance floor. The next few hours they spend just talking to one another, first interrupted by requests to dance before they slip away to sit in a dim staircase. Distantly they can hear the music and the chattering from a few rooms away, but they pay no mind to it.
Kyuhyun doesn’t really know when she notices something is different. When she realizes that Zhou Mi’s hand lingers on her knee a little longer than necessary, when she realizes she keeps on staring at Zhou Mi’s rosy lips while she speaks. She is the one who leans in and captures Zhou Mi’s lips with her own, but Zhou Mi is the one who drags her on her feet and up the stairs.
Their dresses rustle as they fall down on the bed, Kyuhyun on top of Zhou Mi. The laughter that bubbles from Zhou Mi is contagious and soon they’re both smiling into the kisses, pressing their faces close together. Impatiently Kyuhyun is tugging on the corsage Zhou Mi is wearing, trying to free her from the frilly dress with way too many layers. Her heart is beating like a drum and she doesn’t know why her hands aren’t shaking more than this.
Soon enough, Kyuhyun has her hand between Zhou Mi’s legs and she takes delight in the high pitched sigh she manages to elicit from her. Zhou Mi’s lips fall open, a pink tongue darting out to lick the corner of her mouth. That has got to be the most exciting thing Kyuhyun has ever seen, and it sends her blood rushing to her lower body. She has touched herself often enough to know what feels good, fingering Zhou Mi until she comes with a gasp against her neck.
They take only a moment to catch their breath. Then, in a swift movement Zhou Mi rolls them over until she has Kyuhyun pinned against the mattress. She grins as she pushes Kyuhyun’s legs up, slides her fingers along her bare thighs. She ignores the socks Kyuhyun is wearing, ignores the high heels and the silky dress. Instead she teases her for not wearing anything underneath.
There are no tangible words to describe the way Kyuhyun’s head spins, the way she can hardly inhale as she rests back on the bed, her curly hair sprawled on the pillows like a waterfall. Kyuhyun shudders when Zhou Mi traces a path up her thigh with her tongue, dipping between her legs.
It should be awkward, it should feel wrong, they should be ashamed of themselves. Instead, Kyuhyun pushes her fingers into the silky strands of Zhou Mi’s hair and pulls her closer, eagerly lifting her hips to wordlessly show what she wants. The dress pools around her waist as she wraps her legs loosely around Zhou Mi’s neck.
Mere seconds later Kyuhyun could swear she has never felt this good in her life. Her body arches off the bed forcibly, her thighs trembling as she fights to keep them apart. The hot, wet mouth is teasing her just right, and a distant part of her wonders where Zhou Mi learned all these tricks. She fists her hands into the sheets and pulls on them hard, sobbing out a ragged plea.
She shudders against Zhou Mi’s tongue, her breath coming in short gasps as she comes undone.
Zhou Mi doesn’t stop. By the time she pulls back Kyuhyun is a whimpering, panting mess and has climaxed three times against her. It is kind of disgusting how sweat glues her dress on her skin and how it makes her shiver as it cools down, but she can’t really bring herself to care. She pushes the mess of dark brown hair out of her eyes and surges in to kiss Zhou Mi.
The way she tastes herself on Zhou Mi’s tongue makes the lust flare up again. She nearly tackles her as she tries to get as close as possible.
Once they get their clothes off the real fun begins.
Three days after that Zhou Mi gets married. Kyuhyun is invited to the wedding. No one doubts anything as she volunteers to help Zhou Mi prepare for the ceremony, alone. If Zhou Mi’s cheeks are flushed when she repeats her wows, they all think it’s because she’s so happy on her big day, not because Kyuhyun got her off mere minutes prior.
Zhou Mi swears she will return the favour when Kyuhyun gets married two months later. She does.
It’s not the end of it.
This is probably Heechul’s favourite fate thus far and he snickers to himself as he enjoys watching his vivid ideas unravel and turn into reality. For once he doesn’t end their lives early, but rather enjoys getting them into the most imaginative situations possible. Maybe it’s because he dislikes Kyuhyun’s dumb husband, who knows. Maybe it’s because he thinks Zhou Mi’s husband is kind of hot and he might want him for himself (no one will notice if he never has the man reincarnate again, he reasons). Maybe he just likes to watch the two of them fool everyone with their affair that lasts for decades.
In any case, Heechul is amused.
When it’s all over, he wants to let the souls rest for a while but he can’t. Once there was a time when he had souls to spare and he could let them rest for hundreds of years before sending them back on earth. Not now, not anymore. He’s almost short on souls at times. Damn overpopulation. He wonders if he should send another plague down on earth just to make his job a little easier again.
(1914 AD Japan)
The worst thing is the insecurity. They know they will have to leave one day, soon. They know there is no way to avoid the war and their duty, and they aren’t going to even try. Still it would be easier to have a set date when they are going, a certain day when it all begins. It would be better than waiting, guessing how long it’ll be, living in a complete standstill. One couldn’t even really call it living.
Already days ago Kyuhyun has left his home, abandoned it to share the small one room apartment with Zhou Mi instead. At times like this when nothing is certain they agree that every single second they get to spend together counts. They hardly even go outside. There’s nothing there, not for them. Instead they spend endless hours together: they play cards in candlelight, they read the old worn books in the morning before they get up from bed, they write silly poems while they drink tasteless tea, they sing and make their voices blend in an endless variety of songs from their childhood.
The days are better. The nights, they cling on to each other. It’s easier to lose themselves in the hot kisses and feverish touches, forget about the inevitable for a few precious hours. Zhou Mi shudders when Kyuhyun traces a hot tongue down his stomach, scrapes his teeth down on his hipbone hard enough to bruise. He tangles his fingers in those nearly black strands of hair, never urging despite the possessiveness in the gesture.
He only lets go when Kyuhyun crawls closer, straddles his hips and leans down to kiss him hard. Again, he guides the younger man in his movements. Kyuhyun is fingering himself and Zhou Mi reaches behind him, sliding his middle finger in as well. The gasp that falls from Kyuhyun’s full lips at that is already enough to make a person undone and Zhou Mi bites the insides of his cheeks hard enough to hurt just to stay focused.
Everything else is forgotten when Kyuhyun sinks down on Zhou Mi, takes him in to the hilt slow enough to make them both hold their breath. He rides Zhou Mi in deep rolls of his hips, grinding against him time and time again until they’re shuddering with the intensity of the sensations. Kyuhyun is the one who loses it first, tensing as he comes hard between their bodies. Zhou Mi uses the moment to flip them around and fucks him hard until he reaches his own climax.
It’s impossible to miss the way Kyuhyun’s looks at him right after, his arms curling around Zhou Mi to pull him close. Kyuhyun, Zhou Mi whispers, soft as he mouths the other man’s collarbone, mine.
Even when the morning comes, it’s dark. It seems like the sun never really shines these days, like the whole world is dimmed, every colour muted. Kyuhyun is resting his head on Zhou Mi’s shoulder as he traces a pattern on his chest with his fingers. He tells him he doesn’t really want to go. He wishes they could just stay here forever. Zhou Mi agrees.
Three days later their general tells them they’re being sent to Qingdao. This is the perfect opportunity to take over large areas of China and they can’t pass it by. It’s their emperor’s will, which means it’s the will of the gods, the heavens, all the higher powers on earth. They are cold, they are hungry, they are scared. They are also here to fulfil their duty to their country and one can see the determination in the set of their jaw, in the stern look in their eyes.
Not a single man came here to die, they came here to live.
They write letters. They never send them. Zhou Mi knows that he can’t get the letters to another soldier, not even knowing where Kyuhyun is right now. Still he writes him whenever he can, tucks the envelopes neatly away into the side pocket of his bag and hopes he can once give them to Kyuhyun. He counts days until this is over, escapes the bloody reality into his head where all he can hear is Kyuhyun’s voice, Kyuhyun’s breathing, Kyuhyun. When he closes his eyes he remembers that night.
Somehow he gets through the war. Finally, he gets to go back home, back to his parents and his younger brother. He begins to search for Kyuhyun. He asks everyone he can think of, he sends letters, he clings on to every little bit of information.
Until he hears that only three weeks after they parted, Kyuhyun’s squad had been caught in the middle of a German unit. They had escaped and hidden in a bunker, but it hadn’t been enough to shelter them. Not from mustard gas.
Later, Zhou Mi meets Kyuhyun’s sister. She hands him three unopened letters, all of which have his name scribbled across the envelope. It takes him months to finally open the first one.
Twenty-five years later Heechul watches as a nuclear bomb tears Zhou Mi into pieces. He smiles. Now he has them both again, to wait for a perfect opportunity to send their souls back.
(2011 AD Korea)
Kyuhyun isn’t going to turn hamburgers for a living for much longer, anymore, but he is quite glad he works in this particular burger joint when a tall, gorgeous customer walks in. A tall, gorgeous customer he so happens to know as they’ve taken the same lectures, before. It would be a lie not to admit that ever since Kyuhyun has been quite interested, and seeing the object of his desires here, now, when there are practically no customers, is pretty much perfect.
Two hours later the place closes but Kyuhyun doesn’t even make it to the door to flip the sign from open to closed. Zhou Mi isn’t really the type to go for one night stands, he has higher standards than that, so he can’t explain what happened to get them to this point, either. It’s the first time either of them has sex in the back of a burger place, surrounded by dough rolls and flour and the stench of grease from the meat. Not exactly the most romantic setting, but Kyuhyun has Zhou Mi bent over the counter faster than he can even blink.
It’s a first date to remember. They’ll tell their friends later and laugh, fully aware of how desperate they sound.
It might start as a one night stand but it doesn’t end as one. The next day Kyuhyun appears on Zhou Mi’s doorstep, having blackmailed his address from a common friend of theirs. He holds out the box of takeout – no burgers, promised – like an offering and asks if he can come in. Zhou Mi smiles a little wider and holds the door open for him.
Not that they’d end up eating the takeout. The food cools down on the table as they fuck on the deformed couch, the squeaks of the springs loud enough to wake the dead. Hours later they re-heat the food and sit on the same couch, shoulder against shoulder, watching a dumb sitcom neither pays much attention to. Kyuhyun is more focused on sneaking glances at Zhou Mi’s profile, and the way his lips curve to a happy smile. Zhou Mi is more focused on the way Kyuhyun’s thigh presses against his own, how his body warmth seeps through thin layers of clothing.
With time, they learn to take it slow. They spend a night just sleeping right next to one another more often than not. They spend hours outside sitting on the rooftop watching the stars up above. They spend Kyuhyun’s break at work making out behind the soda machine. They spend slow Sunday mornings on the couch watching cartoons and eating cereal.
They spend time together. As much as they can.
It’s almost two years later, on a cold winter morning, that Kyuhyun realizes he is happy. The window is open and the cool breeze blows inside, makes the curtains flap in their hold. He can’t be bothered to get up though and instead he kisses a line down Zhou Mi’s upper arm, teasingly tonguing his elbow. Zhou Mi is as ticklish as ever and wakes up squirming, weakly batting at the other man to let go of him and leave him alone.
Soon enough Kyuhyun licks his way into Zhou Mi’s mouth instead, relishing in the sleepy moan that he gains as a reward. He slides the covers to the floor while shifting closer but neither of them even really realizes how cold it is in their bedroom. Kyuhyun can barely hear the sounds of the traffic through the rushing of blood in his ears as he traces his teeth down Zhou Mi’s spine, admires the arch of his bent back.
Only when Zhou Mi’s arms are shaking from the effort of keeping himself upright, his thighs tense not to part them further, Kyuhyun rewards him with what they both wanted already hours ago. He bites down on Zhou Mi’s shoulder blade as he sinks into his body in one fluent movement of his hips, his long fingers curling around Zhou Mi’s thighs. He holds on tight enough to leave bruises. A part of him likes that, likes to mark Zhou Mi as his own.
Eventually he comes with a murmur of Zhou Mi’s name against the nape of the other man’s neck. That’s exactly what does Zhou Mi in and he trembles from head to toe with the force of his own climax. It almost feels like it’ll never end, and with a soft whimper he falls into the mattress.
What they both enjoy the most, though, is the way they fall back asleep, long limbs tangled together and keeping each other warm. The last thing Kyuhyun hears before he drifts off is the steady beat of Zhou Mi’s heart.
This is not the end of their story. It is merely the beginning.
---
exactly 7500 words.
Thank you to everyone who helped me with this! My little brother deserves a special mention. He wanted me to include the mustard gas and listened to me whine and kicked my ass repeatedly. Also mentioning Becky (repeatedly) and @nashirah (don’t know if you have a lj?) thank you bbs~♥
Also this fic had tons of alternate names. For example becky is getting seriously annoyed with the lack of hanchul sex or this was meant to be qmi, but then heechul happened.
/after eight hours of thinking
me: I still don't have a title
becky: oh my god marjo what's wrong with you
I NEEDED HELP FROM FOUR PERSONS FOR THE TITLE.
This was meant to be a lame excuse for tons of Qmi smut and then somehow Heechul happened :| idk how he keeps on intruding my fics, that bastard. Becky says it’s because I’m a closet petal but…
ALSO I NEVER MEANT TO WRITE HET OR GENDERSWAP D:
I need a shirt with but then Heechul happened.
I’m blathering forgive me I shut up now. BANANAS.
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Thank you ;~~; I'm happy you like it! I love thinking about things like this, about destiny and how two persons can be ~connected~ beyond their lifetime, be it through reincarnation or afterlife or whatever.
ahaha I like angst if it ends well so I consoled myself that they'd get happy in the end, somehow XD Aw but I'm glad you could get your dosage of angst too ;D
I'm not that fond of het either but somehow I enjoyed writing it XD maybe it shows too? idk. But I'm happy you like did I mention already? ♥
Coherency is overrated anyway! \o/ ILU2!♥♥ and I MISS YOU too ;~; I'll keep writing I promise and I hope I get things actually done too.
Heechul loves being in my fics. He must love me very much XD