rabenhorst (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rabenhorst) wrote2010-01-07 04:59 pm
rabenhorst) wrote2010-01-07 04:59 pm
Entry tags:
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Title: Learn to Love
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fonulyn
Rating: R for violence
Pairing: Toshiya/Die
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Mental scars are the deepest ones, most difficult to ever overcome. Unfortunately, usually just sweeping them under a rug isn't an option.
WARNING: Contains character death (it's an OC though).
Comments:
fonulyn: Oh-kays I don't know if this is anything like I wanted it to be, but it didn't leave me alone before I wrote it so I resigned to my fate anyways. A couple of the scenes come actually from these pretty vivid dreams I had, and they kept on returning so I only got rid of them by writing this x) And it's uncharacteristically angsty for me! But I don't think it's that full of angst anyways, it does have a sorta positive vibe to it in the end at least. So yeah. I hope you enjoy! And do tell me what you think :)
Learn to Love
1994
It was a cloudy Wednesday morning, just like any Wednesday morning during the school year. Toshiya was standing beside the fence, waiting for his best friend and classmate, like he had been doing every single morning for the past months. It was getting slightly windy though, and instinctively he tucked up the collar of his jacket, sheltering his eyes against the sun to see the huge clock on the wall of the building.
09:13
His friend should be here soon. The class would start in a couple of minutes and Kazuya couldn’t afford to be late. It was history, too, and they both had to finish their essays to even pass. Toshiya knew they were both in troubles, but it wasn’t the first time and certainly wouldn’t be the last so he didn’t really pay any attention to it. He was rather thinking of the party that would take place on Friday, the big party that everyone had been talking about for weeks.
With a huge sigh, he bent forward to see around the corner. Maybe his friend was already coming? He’d better be, or they would be seriously in troubles. If that was the case he would even dare to smoke a cigarette, he would have to spend his afternoon in detention anyways. What kind of punishment was that anyways, no seventeen-year-old would even bother…
Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted as someone came rushing around the corner, the familiar figure of his friend stopping abruptly right in front of him. “Kaz! What the heck took you so long? C’mon, we’re totally screwed, we -” Toshiya grabbed his friend’s sleeve to pull him along, the bell already signalling the start of the lesson. Yet Kazuya didn’t even move, not an inch, like he was rooted on the spot.
That already made Toshiya suspicious and he stopped, turning around to face his friend again. “What’s wrong?” He asked, a hint of honest worry in his voice although the main feeling was plain annoyance. They were late, and they both knew it, there was no time for playing around. Yet there was something in Kazuya’s posture that radiated seriousness, that made him seem much more stern and almost scary.
He still took a moment, before he began speaking. “Toshiya… I’ve been thinking of this for long. I want you to know, I’m fully aware of what I’m doing. It is the only way.” There was something fully convinced in his voice, something Toshiya couldn’t quite place. Yet he stayed silent, just listened while his friend trailed on.
“I want you to understand why I’m doing this.”
Toshiya raised his eyebrow, suspiciously. Kazuya had been acting weird lately, talking in riddles and saying cryptic things. Yet this was weird even considering that. “Doing what? What are you trying to say?” He finally prompted, not having the patience for the other’s games. He still remembered that history essay, his thoughts already on Friday’s party, wondering how many of his friends would be there. Suddenly, he saw a flash, sunlight reflecting from something metallic.
A gun.
Kazuya raised the weapon slightly, allowing it to slip away from his sleeve. It had been easy to hide it in the loose sleeves, no one questioning the shy and reserved student about it. No one had probably even paid any attention to him. Everything seemed to fall silent and Toshiya just stared, from wide eyes, unable to even piece this all together. It felt that his heart stopped beating, the whole world freezing around them.
“I want you to understand.” Kazuya repeated persistently, his eyes gleaming almost feverishly. He was smiling, oddly calm and Toshiya could only stare at those smiling lips, unable to get over it. The smile. “You are the reason. I want you to follow me.” The words were soft, urging, filled with a twisted gentleness that made cold shivers run down one’s spine.
“I love you, Toshiya.”
A loud bang echoed in the air and instinctively Toshiya covered his ears, sheltering his head. At first he thought he’d been shot. Why didn’t he feel any pain? He didn’t hear the distant yelling, the screaming and the running steps getting closer and closer. Everything was like wrapped in cotton batting. Yet he could’ve sworn he heard the thud when Kazuya’s body hit the ground, right at his feet.
Instinctively he fell down on his knees, reaching out for the other teenager. Where once had been dark brown, messy hair was now only another kind of mess, red blood seeping through from between his fingers when he tried to put it all together, desperately bringing his palms where once had been the back of his friend’s head. Everything happened like in a haze. Before he even realized the sirens were there, people swarming around him, gently pulling him back as they took the older boy away.
There was Kazuya’s blood on his hands, on his shirt, everywhere. His mind numb, he watched the ambulance leave. He was shaking.
Next Part
Author:
fonulynRating: R for violence
Pairing: Toshiya/Die
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Mental scars are the deepest ones, most difficult to ever overcome. Unfortunately, usually just sweeping them under a rug isn't an option.
WARNING: Contains character death (it's an OC though).
Comments:
fonulyn: Oh-kays I don't know if this is anything like I wanted it to be, but it didn't leave me alone before I wrote it so I resigned to my fate anyways. A couple of the scenes come actually from these pretty vivid dreams I had, and they kept on returning so I only got rid of them by writing this x) And it's uncharacteristically angsty for me! But I don't think it's that full of angst anyways, it does have a sorta positive vibe to it in the end at least. So yeah. I hope you enjoy! And do tell me what you think :)1994
It was a cloudy Wednesday morning, just like any Wednesday morning during the school year. Toshiya was standing beside the fence, waiting for his best friend and classmate, like he had been doing every single morning for the past months. It was getting slightly windy though, and instinctively he tucked up the collar of his jacket, sheltering his eyes against the sun to see the huge clock on the wall of the building.
09:13
His friend should be here soon. The class would start in a couple of minutes and Kazuya couldn’t afford to be late. It was history, too, and they both had to finish their essays to even pass. Toshiya knew they were both in troubles, but it wasn’t the first time and certainly wouldn’t be the last so he didn’t really pay any attention to it. He was rather thinking of the party that would take place on Friday, the big party that everyone had been talking about for weeks.
With a huge sigh, he bent forward to see around the corner. Maybe his friend was already coming? He’d better be, or they would be seriously in troubles. If that was the case he would even dare to smoke a cigarette, he would have to spend his afternoon in detention anyways. What kind of punishment was that anyways, no seventeen-year-old would even bother…
Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted as someone came rushing around the corner, the familiar figure of his friend stopping abruptly right in front of him. “Kaz! What the heck took you so long? C’mon, we’re totally screwed, we -” Toshiya grabbed his friend’s sleeve to pull him along, the bell already signalling the start of the lesson. Yet Kazuya didn’t even move, not an inch, like he was rooted on the spot.
That already made Toshiya suspicious and he stopped, turning around to face his friend again. “What’s wrong?” He asked, a hint of honest worry in his voice although the main feeling was plain annoyance. They were late, and they both knew it, there was no time for playing around. Yet there was something in Kazuya’s posture that radiated seriousness, that made him seem much more stern and almost scary.
He still took a moment, before he began speaking. “Toshiya… I’ve been thinking of this for long. I want you to know, I’m fully aware of what I’m doing. It is the only way.” There was something fully convinced in his voice, something Toshiya couldn’t quite place. Yet he stayed silent, just listened while his friend trailed on.
“I want you to understand why I’m doing this.”
Toshiya raised his eyebrow, suspiciously. Kazuya had been acting weird lately, talking in riddles and saying cryptic things. Yet this was weird even considering that. “Doing what? What are you trying to say?” He finally prompted, not having the patience for the other’s games. He still remembered that history essay, his thoughts already on Friday’s party, wondering how many of his friends would be there. Suddenly, he saw a flash, sunlight reflecting from something metallic.
A gun.
Kazuya raised the weapon slightly, allowing it to slip away from his sleeve. It had been easy to hide it in the loose sleeves, no one questioning the shy and reserved student about it. No one had probably even paid any attention to him. Everything seemed to fall silent and Toshiya just stared, from wide eyes, unable to even piece this all together. It felt that his heart stopped beating, the whole world freezing around them.
“I want you to understand.” Kazuya repeated persistently, his eyes gleaming almost feverishly. He was smiling, oddly calm and Toshiya could only stare at those smiling lips, unable to get over it. The smile. “You are the reason. I want you to follow me.” The words were soft, urging, filled with a twisted gentleness that made cold shivers run down one’s spine.
“I love you, Toshiya.”
A loud bang echoed in the air and instinctively Toshiya covered his ears, sheltering his head. At first he thought he’d been shot. Why didn’t he feel any pain? He didn’t hear the distant yelling, the screaming and the running steps getting closer and closer. Everything was like wrapped in cotton batting. Yet he could’ve sworn he heard the thud when Kazuya’s body hit the ground, right at his feet.
Instinctively he fell down on his knees, reaching out for the other teenager. Where once had been dark brown, messy hair was now only another kind of mess, red blood seeping through from between his fingers when he tried to put it all together, desperately bringing his palms where once had been the back of his friend’s head. Everything happened like in a haze. Before he even realized the sirens were there, people swarming around him, gently pulling him back as they took the older boy away.
There was Kazuya’s blood on his hands, on his shirt, everywhere. His mind numb, he watched the ambulance leave. He was shaking.
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And hun! Your card arrived today :D Made me smile soooo much! ♥
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Oh gods no, of course not make Die off himself. That would have shocked me seriously! Even more than the scene did already.
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It would've made me cry my eyes out, seriously XD There's no way I could've done that!
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