rabenhorst (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rabenhorst) wrote2010-01-01 12:42 pm
rabenhorst) wrote2010-01-01 12:42 pm
Entry tags:
(no subject)
Title: To Kiss A Man.
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fonulyn
Rating: PG
Pairing: Toshiya/Die (actually has some teeny-weeny hints of Die/Kaoru, Die/Kyo and Die/Shinya too)
Theme: 025: Just one more kiss (for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
50stories)
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Sometimes, it’s the simplest things that you never dare to try. Things you wonder, things you can’t get off your mind. And for years, Die has wondered. How would it be to kiss a man?
Comments:
fonulyn: Happy new year to everyone! ;) Wanted to start the year with a fic, and what would be more appropriate than to start it also with a new challenge? XD I’m so going to kill myself trying to finish all 50 of the stories for this claim (especially since I’m still lacking a dozen for the D/K claim) but it’s something I wanted to try. Needed to try. C’mon the pair needs more love anyways! …and now I’m rambling. I hope you enjoy this ficlet, and you have my promise that there is plenty of more to come ;) Let’s make this a happy new year, shall we? ♥
And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive.
To Kiss A Man.
It was a wonder that Die had never questioned his sexuality even when he had been a part of the visual scene for a few years. Make-up, girly clothes and long hair, it was just natural and a part of the whole idea. Of course it didn’t make him gay, that was just ridiculous. Something like that couldn’t define who you were, what you felt inside. Yet, he was surrounded by very attractive men, trying to be as feminine as they possibly could and yet not even once he felt drawn to them.
Not before he met Shinya, that was.
It was the classical scenario of a guy meets a girl. Except that the girl he met was actually a guy. So probably he should phrase it differently; it was the classical scenario of a guy meets a guy dressed up as a girl and looking feminine enough to fool anyone. Die had honestly been fooled by the feminine grace the slender drummer possessed, hadn’t been able to look past the long hair and big clear eyes. He had developed a crush on Shinya, instantly when seeing him for the first time, and he had no troubles admitting it.
Only that the crush had ended as fast as it had begun when the drummer had spoken up and shattered the feminine image with his much too manly voice. Still, that had been the first time that had made Die wonder. Had made him wonder how it would feel to kiss a man.
---
Being surrounded by heaps of attractive girly-dressing men in the visual scene was one thing, but being surrounded by four members of the same band, who were all ridiculously good looking, was even worse. Most of the time Die didn’t have the time to dwell on that though, he didn’t have the needed energy to drool after his bandmates while he had to take care of his own appearance as well. It was a war. A war of good looks and everyone was trying to surpass the other in who looked best.
They all had their own directions to head to. Toshiya and Shinya were the girly girls, for example, the perfect ladies who could fool any man with their looks. It happened more than once that they scored invitations from horny men, who only later on realized that the target of their attempts was lacking something on the chest-department and had something too much between the legs. Kyo had his own look, as always, no one knew what the heck he was up to.
Then there was Kaoru, who had practically perfected the androgynous look, neither manly nor feminine. Whether his hair was pink or purple it was shimmering in contrast with black leather and belts he was wearing, underlining the sharp features the man had. He was enchanting, to say the least, his features like carved from stone into such delicate arrangement. That was what drew Die’s attention first. It started out as envy. He wanted an aristocratic nose like that too. He wanted cheekbones like that too. He wanted that.
The next thing the envy led was admiration. Die idolized Kaoru, looked up to him, wanted to be like him. Not as much as Toshiya did, most likely, and on different grounds but still the point remains valid.
And in the middle of the night, when Die was lying awake in his bed and staring at the ceiling, he wondered just how it would be to touch those elegantly curved lips. How it would be to kiss Kaoru.
How it would feel, to kiss a man.
---
It was a common thing to have them all gathered together, usually in Shinya’s apartment since the drummer was after all neat and had a big living room for all of them to spend time in. Sometimes they were only hanging around, enjoying moments of actually not working. More often than not, there was alcohol involved too though, drinking always leading to silly games they all avoided when sober.
This was no exception. It was a new year’s party, or that was what they called it. Actually it was already the January 2nd and they had used it just as an excuse to get together and destroy the last bottles of liquor they had gotten for Christmas. They had started out by chatting and drinking and at some point of the evening they had ended up with random drinking games. Finally, someone had suggested they play truth or dare, which miraculously had been accepted.
A few rounds into the game, Kyo had chosen dare and instantly Shinya dared him to kiss Die, full on. It was probably meant to be a punishment for the guitarist for yet another merciless prank he had pulled off on the drummer’s expense, although right now Die couldn’t really focus his drunken mind enough to figure out what exactly it could be. Still, the fact remained that Kyo was supposed to kiss him, and the realization only struck him when he could feel the vocalist’s lush lips almost touch his own, felt the hot breath so close.
Die was completely frozen. He couldn’t move, couldn’t act on it, couldn’t do anything at all. He felt the warm lips press against his own, move tentatively and then… nothing. Kyo pulled back abruptly, before the kiss had had the chance to evolve to a real one. He was laughing though, his eyes sparkling and his gaze slightly unfocused. “Sorry man.” He waved aside, shaking his head. “I can’t, just can’t. Nothing personal!”
They all laughed, Die laughed, the game went on and the drinking resumed its usual pace. Yet, there was something in the back of Die’s mind that he couldn’t shake off. He wondered. How it would feel, to really kiss Kyo. To kiss a man.
---
There was some irony in the fact that Die had survived years and years of the visual scene and the moment they drifted away from it he figured he was interested in men. The girly men in dresses had done nothing to him, except for fooled him to think those were some pretty flat-chested girls. Yet now that he was surrounded by sweaty, masculine men, he noticed he was beginning to rapidly fall for the charm. He was attracted to them, whether he wanted it or not.
Surprisingly, he didn’t need to go through any difficult transitions or major self-doubts because of that. Somehow it just clicked, the realization got stuck in his mind and didn’t let go. Maybe it was easier because there was a certain target for his attention. Of all the men in the world, he had again managed to single out one of his bandmates. Yes, again. This time it was Toshiya.
Inwardly, it made him laugh. He had needed to go through all his bandmates in his mind to get to this. He had wondered the same about each and every one of them. Yet, it had been the last one to catch his attention who managed to hold it till the end. It was like he had been looking, but hadn’t really managed to see what was right before him. He felt that his eyes had opened and instead of looking, he now was really looking. And what he saw, left him breathless.
There was something so incredibly attractive in the way Toshiya simply was, how he filled the air around him. He was practically dancing on stage, dripping wet with sweat by the end of the second song. He had a broad chest, firm muscles and abdomen to drool after. His fingers were long and Die couldn’t stop imagining how good those warm palms must feel on bare skin.
Toshiya was the first man he wanted to kiss. Not a girl, not a man in a girly disguise. A man.
Suddenly, there was something distinctively different in the casual way Toshiya used to hug him. There was certain tension in it, clearly sexual undercurrents and it became painfully obvious to Die that he hadn’t been as subtle in his admiration as he had hoped to be. Toshiya knew. It caused a flash of panic, shooting through Die’s consciousness until he realized something else. It wasn’t one-sided. Toshiya didn’t only reflect his admiration back at him, but he honestly responded to it.
That was the best thing that had ever happened to him. At least Die was convinced of it. Everything happened fast in the end. Their first kiss was something Die cherished in his mind even years later, remembered it crystal clear. He didn’t remember his real first kiss, could barely place it back at the times he’d been at school. Yet this one, it was like branded into his mind and he still kept on returning to it in his thoughts, even after years of relationship and dozens of kisses, to the sensations it had elicited in him.
Sometimes, he still wondered how it would be to kiss a man. Any man, a random man.
Yet when Toshiya’s lips met his, he knew it couldn’t get any better than that.
---
words 1526
Author:
fonulynRating: PG
Pairing: Toshiya/Die (actually has some teeny-weeny hints of Die/Kaoru, Die/Kyo and Die/Shinya too)
Theme: 025: Just one more kiss (for
50stories)Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Sometimes, it’s the simplest things that you never dare to try. Things you wonder, things you can’t get off your mind. And for years, Die has wondered. How would it be to kiss a man?
Comments:
fonulyn: Happy new year to everyone! ;) Wanted to start the year with a fic, and what would be more appropriate than to start it also with a new challenge? XD I’m so going to kill myself trying to finish all 50 of the stories for this claim (especially since I’m still lacking a dozen for the D/K claim) but it’s something I wanted to try. Needed to try. C’mon the pair needs more love anyways! …and now I’m rambling. I hope you enjoy this ficlet, and you have my promise that there is plenty of more to come ;) Let’s make this a happy new year, shall we? ♥ And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive.
It was a wonder that Die had never questioned his sexuality even when he had been a part of the visual scene for a few years. Make-up, girly clothes and long hair, it was just natural and a part of the whole idea. Of course it didn’t make him gay, that was just ridiculous. Something like that couldn’t define who you were, what you felt inside. Yet, he was surrounded by very attractive men, trying to be as feminine as they possibly could and yet not even once he felt drawn to them.
Not before he met Shinya, that was.
It was the classical scenario of a guy meets a girl. Except that the girl he met was actually a guy. So probably he should phrase it differently; it was the classical scenario of a guy meets a guy dressed up as a girl and looking feminine enough to fool anyone. Die had honestly been fooled by the feminine grace the slender drummer possessed, hadn’t been able to look past the long hair and big clear eyes. He had developed a crush on Shinya, instantly when seeing him for the first time, and he had no troubles admitting it.
Only that the crush had ended as fast as it had begun when the drummer had spoken up and shattered the feminine image with his much too manly voice. Still, that had been the first time that had made Die wonder. Had made him wonder how it would feel to kiss a man.
Being surrounded by heaps of attractive girly-dressing men in the visual scene was one thing, but being surrounded by four members of the same band, who were all ridiculously good looking, was even worse. Most of the time Die didn’t have the time to dwell on that though, he didn’t have the needed energy to drool after his bandmates while he had to take care of his own appearance as well. It was a war. A war of good looks and everyone was trying to surpass the other in who looked best.
They all had their own directions to head to. Toshiya and Shinya were the girly girls, for example, the perfect ladies who could fool any man with their looks. It happened more than once that they scored invitations from horny men, who only later on realized that the target of their attempts was lacking something on the chest-department and had something too much between the legs. Kyo had his own look, as always, no one knew what the heck he was up to.
Then there was Kaoru, who had practically perfected the androgynous look, neither manly nor feminine. Whether his hair was pink or purple it was shimmering in contrast with black leather and belts he was wearing, underlining the sharp features the man had. He was enchanting, to say the least, his features like carved from stone into such delicate arrangement. That was what drew Die’s attention first. It started out as envy. He wanted an aristocratic nose like that too. He wanted cheekbones like that too. He wanted that.
The next thing the envy led was admiration. Die idolized Kaoru, looked up to him, wanted to be like him. Not as much as Toshiya did, most likely, and on different grounds but still the point remains valid.
And in the middle of the night, when Die was lying awake in his bed and staring at the ceiling, he wondered just how it would be to touch those elegantly curved lips. How it would be to kiss Kaoru.
How it would feel, to kiss a man.
It was a common thing to have them all gathered together, usually in Shinya’s apartment since the drummer was after all neat and had a big living room for all of them to spend time in. Sometimes they were only hanging around, enjoying moments of actually not working. More often than not, there was alcohol involved too though, drinking always leading to silly games they all avoided when sober.
This was no exception. It was a new year’s party, or that was what they called it. Actually it was already the January 2nd and they had used it just as an excuse to get together and destroy the last bottles of liquor they had gotten for Christmas. They had started out by chatting and drinking and at some point of the evening they had ended up with random drinking games. Finally, someone had suggested they play truth or dare, which miraculously had been accepted.
A few rounds into the game, Kyo had chosen dare and instantly Shinya dared him to kiss Die, full on. It was probably meant to be a punishment for the guitarist for yet another merciless prank he had pulled off on the drummer’s expense, although right now Die couldn’t really focus his drunken mind enough to figure out what exactly it could be. Still, the fact remained that Kyo was supposed to kiss him, and the realization only struck him when he could feel the vocalist’s lush lips almost touch his own, felt the hot breath so close.
Die was completely frozen. He couldn’t move, couldn’t act on it, couldn’t do anything at all. He felt the warm lips press against his own, move tentatively and then… nothing. Kyo pulled back abruptly, before the kiss had had the chance to evolve to a real one. He was laughing though, his eyes sparkling and his gaze slightly unfocused. “Sorry man.” He waved aside, shaking his head. “I can’t, just can’t. Nothing personal!”
They all laughed, Die laughed, the game went on and the drinking resumed its usual pace. Yet, there was something in the back of Die’s mind that he couldn’t shake off. He wondered. How it would feel, to really kiss Kyo. To kiss a man.
There was some irony in the fact that Die had survived years and years of the visual scene and the moment they drifted away from it he figured he was interested in men. The girly men in dresses had done nothing to him, except for fooled him to think those were some pretty flat-chested girls. Yet now that he was surrounded by sweaty, masculine men, he noticed he was beginning to rapidly fall for the charm. He was attracted to them, whether he wanted it or not.
Surprisingly, he didn’t need to go through any difficult transitions or major self-doubts because of that. Somehow it just clicked, the realization got stuck in his mind and didn’t let go. Maybe it was easier because there was a certain target for his attention. Of all the men in the world, he had again managed to single out one of his bandmates. Yes, again. This time it was Toshiya.
Inwardly, it made him laugh. He had needed to go through all his bandmates in his mind to get to this. He had wondered the same about each and every one of them. Yet, it had been the last one to catch his attention who managed to hold it till the end. It was like he had been looking, but hadn’t really managed to see what was right before him. He felt that his eyes had opened and instead of looking, he now was really looking. And what he saw, left him breathless.
There was something so incredibly attractive in the way Toshiya simply was, how he filled the air around him. He was practically dancing on stage, dripping wet with sweat by the end of the second song. He had a broad chest, firm muscles and abdomen to drool after. His fingers were long and Die couldn’t stop imagining how good those warm palms must feel on bare skin.
Toshiya was the first man he wanted to kiss. Not a girl, not a man in a girly disguise. A man.
Suddenly, there was something distinctively different in the casual way Toshiya used to hug him. There was certain tension in it, clearly sexual undercurrents and it became painfully obvious to Die that he hadn’t been as subtle in his admiration as he had hoped to be. Toshiya knew. It caused a flash of panic, shooting through Die’s consciousness until he realized something else. It wasn’t one-sided. Toshiya didn’t only reflect his admiration back at him, but he honestly responded to it.
That was the best thing that had ever happened to him. At least Die was convinced of it. Everything happened fast in the end. Their first kiss was something Die cherished in his mind even years later, remembered it crystal clear. He didn’t remember his real first kiss, could barely place it back at the times he’d been at school. Yet this one, it was like branded into his mind and he still kept on returning to it in his thoughts, even after years of relationship and dozens of kisses, to the sensations it had elicited in him.
Sometimes, he still wondered how it would be to kiss a man. Any man, a random man.
Yet when Toshiya’s lips met his, he knew it couldn’t get any better than that.
---
words 1526
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I like how Toshiya was the one that stuck in the end<3
Cutecutecute<3
A smile instantly came to my face after reading this ^__^
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HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!
Aw, so you DID take the themes? I'm proud of you! And you know how much I liked this. It's almost like a spiritual little journey until Die reaches his destination, which - of course - is Toshiya. It's sweet and cute and just so 'aaaawww'
I'm still in bed XD Got there around 6am and now I can't get myself to get up really. I send you a sms later when we meet, eh? We DO meet, don't we? You can't leave me alone today!
We all missed you yesterday. It would've been much, much nicer even (and it was very nice already) with you. *hugs tight*
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I did. Babbled with the mod of the comm shortly and then in my journal and decided to take it x) Though the second set is difficult so I'm already regretting it XD
I'm still glad you liked it :) I really liked the idea and wanted to write it down too.
heh sure sure XD I'm a bit braindead and bored and thinking of what to amuse myself with.
All? Aw but maybe once :) *hugs back*
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Happy new year (:
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Happy new year to you too! :)
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some fluff inbedded in my mind to keep me going, to make cean up and find the power and will to do something...
thanks, this was lovely<3
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seriously, every single time, you (and seinen_no of course) amaze me.
this was such a nice start to the year, thank you.
aha i was looking at claiming d/t for that 50stories thingy but i'm extremely glad i didn't. you shall do a better job than i would've done. :D
now i must get back to this stupid textual analysis homework.
but ahhhhhh... lovely as always.
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I'm glad if it was a good start ;) But hey, don't even say things like that, young lady! You would've done an awesome job. In fact, you could still claim the first theme set in the community, I only have the second ;D You should!
Good luck with the homework though!
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it was a very good start ;3 heh... i've claimed it... which is quite stupid really since i've got so many other things to write. but what the hell... there's never too much d/t in the world.
it is complete ;D and now i'm drawing die and toshiya in myaku outfits *happy dance*
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Good then! haha, I'm kind of frustrated since I'm trying to work on this one story (D/T *coughs*) but it won't really make progress...
You claimed it? Good girl! I'm proud of you ;D And you're SO right! There's never ever too much D/T in the world.
Good! And that now made me giggle all happily XD
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Thank you!
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all the best in completing the set...
looking forward to your stuff...
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Thank you so much :) Your comments always make me smile!
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Hope you had a good new year's party! May the good things be as good this year and the bad just vanish!
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Same goes for you! Happy New Year :)
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had me smiling from beggining to end
yet, this made me realize I cant remember my first gay kiss WTH it makes me feel weird D:
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haha, well, it's not that big of a deal XD
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