rabenhorst (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rabenhorst) wrote2009-11-24 04:49 pm
rabenhorst) wrote2009-11-24 04:49 pm
Entry tags:
(no subject)
Title: Of Onions and Life
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fonulyn
Rating: PG
Pairing: Toshiya/Die
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Indeed, it is weird to compare a person to an onion, Die realizes that. Yet he can’t help the association, not when it’s so obvious. Years he’s been trying to figure out all the layers there is to a certain special person, and even now he’s not sure if he’ll ever reach the very core.
Comments:
fonulyn: This was inspired actually by the wonderful community ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
mrbassisto (go check it out if you didn’t) and the constant talks about Toshiya’s personality and how he’s often written in fiction. I’ve been thinking of his character a lot lately, so it kind of escalated into this (maybe slightly incoherent) piece of fic x) I hope you do enjoy! And this is especially for diextoshiyalove and its first week in action! 8D (Go check it out too!)
And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive.
Of Onions and Life
It’s said to take a lifetime to really know someone. A person is layered like an onion, when you peel off one part another is revealed, and the journey goes on and on and on. Until you reach the very core. Usually you give up halfway there, your fingers hurting and your eyes stinging until you can’t help but to cry, and you throw the onion across the room straight against a wall. Sometimes, you have the patience to work through all the layers though. Sometimes, you reach the very essence of the onion, and once you do, there’s no greater feeling than the satisfaction that success brings.
Indeed, it is weird to compare a person to an onion, Die realizes that. Yet he can’t help the association, not when it’s so obvious and it works, damnit. He has seen it so many times, he has been there. He has gotten his fingers sore and bleeding, trying to work his way to the core, and the moments of success have been less than scarce. Sometimes it’s easy, only a few layers to work through and Die considers himself one of those persons. It’s easy to figure him out, he wears his moods on his face, his emotions in his eyes and it doesn’t take knowing him for ten years before he’s been figured out. Then again, some people have more layers than seems even possible.
Toshiya is one of that type.
That might sound surprising to anyone who knows the bassist only shallowly. Isn’t he just an easygoing, happy-go-lucky person who finds good in everything and everyone, who laughs and jokes, who is always around when something fun is going on? He is one big goof, and people love him for it. Essentially, that’s how Toshiya really is to them. But they don’t know the layers. Die thought, too, that Toshiya was as easy to figure out as he is himself. Soon he had to notice he was mistaken.
The first Toshiya he got to know was the shy and friendly Toshiya, smiling that adorable little smile that revealed just a hint of his crooked teeth. His too loud laughter, trembling a little when he channelled his nervousness into it, later turning into a genuine cackle that everyone grew to love. They had been young then, excited and nervous, willing to make it big but not really knowing what it would take. Already then, Die and Toshiya had naturally sought for support in each other, sharing several similar traits in their personalities. It made it easy to form a friendship.
The second layer, the second Toshiya Die ever saw, was the affectionate, joking goofball. Someone who might just grab you into a big bearhug in the middle of the normal routines, exclaiming you looked exactly like someone who needs a hug. Sometimes he didn’t even say anything, just hugged Die from behind, smiling against his neck as he could feel the tension seep off the guitarist’s form. Although Die hadn’t admitted anything then, not yet, he had been living off of the strength he drew from those embraces. It had been his source of will to go on, something that kept him sane and on his feet.
They grew closer with time. They learned to trust each other, and they learned to love each other. That was when the mystery named Toshiya began to unfold.
It wasn’t the first time they shared a few beers, lolling on the couch in Toshiya’s apartment and talking nonsense through the night. Somewhere, along the way, the bassist seemed to change though. A little, so little that it was hardly noticeable. Still it was like a huge, screaming sign for Die. It was the first time he really found the sensitive, serious side in the younger man. It was the first night they poured their hearts content out, opened up to each other. It was the scariest feeling, Die thought afterwards, holding out your heart in your palm to give it away, knowing you could never take it back.
Yet he had never regretted the decision. Only by doing this, he had been rewarded with the next layer of Toshiya. He didn’t only know him as a friend now, but learned to know the gentle, affectionate and yet playful nature that was so similar and yet so unlike the public image Toshiya displayed. It was the private Toshiya, the one who made you tea in the middle of the night when you felt bad, the one who held you close when the whole world seemed to suffocate you, the one who needed a good cry every now and then just to cleanse the worries off his soul. There were whole new worlds opening up, and Die loved exploring every bit of them.
He had already thought he knew Toshiya as well as a person can know another. He had thought there was nothing else to see, nothing else to find out and he was certain he had reached the very core. And yet, the other man keeps on surprising him, time and time again. Just when he thinks he knows exactly what to expect, his perceptions are turned upside down. There is the wise, calm Toshiya who always knows what to say. There is the young, bouncy Toshiya who is – and always will be – a child at heart. There is the stubborn, perfectionist Toshiya who focuses on his work with unseen passion.
Sometimes, life is a roller-coaster ride with Toshiya. Die knows him better than anyone, that much is clear. He has worked his way through the layers, and he is very close to reaching his goal, the very essence of Toshiya. The moment when he realizes he has almost reached the end of his journey, he stops. He already has his fingernails under the last layer, ready to carefully tear it off so he can get to the core, finally. He hesitates.
Slowly, consciously he allows his grip to loosen until he lets go.
Die doesn’t want to reach the end of his journey. Not when it comes to Toshiya. He still wants to be surprised, wants to be amazed by the new depths he encounters every single day he is allowed to share his life with the other man. He already knows Toshiya better than anyone, and he decides it is enough. He has still time to figure out the rest.
In the darkness of the night, he snuggles up close into the shared warmth, presses himself against that relaxed, sleepy figure that is resting right beside him. He feels Toshiya’s arms tighten around him, and he can’t help but to smile.
One day. One day he will know everything there is to know of the man he wants to grow old with.
For now, he will just enjoy the journey.
Author:
fonulynRating: PG
Pairing: Toshiya/Die
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Indeed, it is weird to compare a person to an onion, Die realizes that. Yet he can’t help the association, not when it’s so obvious. Years he’s been trying to figure out all the layers there is to a certain special person, and even now he’s not sure if he’ll ever reach the very core.
Comments:
fonulyn: This was inspired actually by the wonderful community mrbassisto (go check it out if you didn’t) and the constant talks about Toshiya’s personality and how he’s often written in fiction. I’ve been thinking of his character a lot lately, so it kind of escalated into this (maybe slightly incoherent) piece of fic x) I hope you do enjoy! And this is especially for diextoshiyalove and its first week in action! 8D (Go check it out too!)And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive.
It’s said to take a lifetime to really know someone. A person is layered like an onion, when you peel off one part another is revealed, and the journey goes on and on and on. Until you reach the very core. Usually you give up halfway there, your fingers hurting and your eyes stinging until you can’t help but to cry, and you throw the onion across the room straight against a wall. Sometimes, you have the patience to work through all the layers though. Sometimes, you reach the very essence of the onion, and once you do, there’s no greater feeling than the satisfaction that success brings.
Indeed, it is weird to compare a person to an onion, Die realizes that. Yet he can’t help the association, not when it’s so obvious and it works, damnit. He has seen it so many times, he has been there. He has gotten his fingers sore and bleeding, trying to work his way to the core, and the moments of success have been less than scarce. Sometimes it’s easy, only a few layers to work through and Die considers himself one of those persons. It’s easy to figure him out, he wears his moods on his face, his emotions in his eyes and it doesn’t take knowing him for ten years before he’s been figured out. Then again, some people have more layers than seems even possible.
Toshiya is one of that type.
That might sound surprising to anyone who knows the bassist only shallowly. Isn’t he just an easygoing, happy-go-lucky person who finds good in everything and everyone, who laughs and jokes, who is always around when something fun is going on? He is one big goof, and people love him for it. Essentially, that’s how Toshiya really is to them. But they don’t know the layers. Die thought, too, that Toshiya was as easy to figure out as he is himself. Soon he had to notice he was mistaken.
The first Toshiya he got to know was the shy and friendly Toshiya, smiling that adorable little smile that revealed just a hint of his crooked teeth. His too loud laughter, trembling a little when he channelled his nervousness into it, later turning into a genuine cackle that everyone grew to love. They had been young then, excited and nervous, willing to make it big but not really knowing what it would take. Already then, Die and Toshiya had naturally sought for support in each other, sharing several similar traits in their personalities. It made it easy to form a friendship.
The second layer, the second Toshiya Die ever saw, was the affectionate, joking goofball. Someone who might just grab you into a big bearhug in the middle of the normal routines, exclaiming you looked exactly like someone who needs a hug. Sometimes he didn’t even say anything, just hugged Die from behind, smiling against his neck as he could feel the tension seep off the guitarist’s form. Although Die hadn’t admitted anything then, not yet, he had been living off of the strength he drew from those embraces. It had been his source of will to go on, something that kept him sane and on his feet.
They grew closer with time. They learned to trust each other, and they learned to love each other. That was when the mystery named Toshiya began to unfold.
It wasn’t the first time they shared a few beers, lolling on the couch in Toshiya’s apartment and talking nonsense through the night. Somewhere, along the way, the bassist seemed to change though. A little, so little that it was hardly noticeable. Still it was like a huge, screaming sign for Die. It was the first time he really found the sensitive, serious side in the younger man. It was the first night they poured their hearts content out, opened up to each other. It was the scariest feeling, Die thought afterwards, holding out your heart in your palm to give it away, knowing you could never take it back.
Yet he had never regretted the decision. Only by doing this, he had been rewarded with the next layer of Toshiya. He didn’t only know him as a friend now, but learned to know the gentle, affectionate and yet playful nature that was so similar and yet so unlike the public image Toshiya displayed. It was the private Toshiya, the one who made you tea in the middle of the night when you felt bad, the one who held you close when the whole world seemed to suffocate you, the one who needed a good cry every now and then just to cleanse the worries off his soul. There were whole new worlds opening up, and Die loved exploring every bit of them.
He had already thought he knew Toshiya as well as a person can know another. He had thought there was nothing else to see, nothing else to find out and he was certain he had reached the very core. And yet, the other man keeps on surprising him, time and time again. Just when he thinks he knows exactly what to expect, his perceptions are turned upside down. There is the wise, calm Toshiya who always knows what to say. There is the young, bouncy Toshiya who is – and always will be – a child at heart. There is the stubborn, perfectionist Toshiya who focuses on his work with unseen passion.
Sometimes, life is a roller-coaster ride with Toshiya. Die knows him better than anyone, that much is clear. He has worked his way through the layers, and he is very close to reaching his goal, the very essence of Toshiya. The moment when he realizes he has almost reached the end of his journey, he stops. He already has his fingernails under the last layer, ready to carefully tear it off so he can get to the core, finally. He hesitates.
Slowly, consciously he allows his grip to loosen until he lets go.
Die doesn’t want to reach the end of his journey. Not when it comes to Toshiya. He still wants to be surprised, wants to be amazed by the new depths he encounters every single day he is allowed to share his life with the other man. He already knows Toshiya better than anyone, and he decides it is enough. He has still time to figure out the rest.
In the darkness of the night, he snuggles up close into the shared warmth, presses himself against that relaxed, sleepy figure that is resting right beside him. He feels Toshiya’s arms tighten around him, and he can’t help but to smile.
One day. One day he will know everything there is to know of the man he wants to grow old with.
For now, he will just enjoy the journey.
no subject
haha, yes! XD
Thanks again hun ;) So much!