rabenhorst (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rabenhorst) wrote2008-08-28 05:46 pm
rabenhorst) wrote2008-08-28 05:46 pm
(no subject)
Title: Worlds Collide; Chapter 3
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
seinen_no and fonulyn
Rating: NC17
Pairing: Die and Kaoru
Disclaimer: We own no one, only our dirty imaginations.
Summary: As children the son of the Lord and the slave-boy were best of friends and the most important persons in each other’s lives. That was torn apart when the son of the Lord was sent away to get his education, and the boys were denied every form of keeping in contact. What happens when they meet again after all those years, now grown to be gorgeous young men, both bound by their place in the society?
Comments:
seinen_no: Here we are again with the next chapter and some decent smut^^ I'm a bit tired. Much stress lately so I'm actually glad we have this fic done and don't need to rush. Though I feel a bit bad since we didn't have the time to start the j-roch charity fic for cadkitten yet. Summer sucks XD
So yeah, on a slightly happier side, I hope you all like this chap. No drama here at least^^
fonulyn: This is probably the ‘high’ of the story, seeing how much this chapter is differing from the previous ones in mood XD It’s happier and I was at least smiling when reading it. But I’ll let you read to find out more of it x) I’m too tired to give any more coherent comment. I just hope you’ll enjoy the chappie!
And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive .
Previously happened: Part 1, Part 2
Worlds Collide
Chapter 3
The rest of the day went by just like any other day, since Die had to hurry to his other duties as soon as the breakfast was over. He still was in a good mood though, thinking that in the evening he'd meet his friend again. That day, Kaoru couldn't wait for the evening to come. The past days had been boring, except for the hunt which had been a nice distraction. He just wasn't used to be lazy and sit around almost all day, but he also didn't feel like working out either since he would've preferred to spend some time with the redhead.
Although Tanaka had been totally self confident and looked even proud of himself the previous day, he now seemed to almost avoid his brother as if he was afraid of him and his reaction. As he bumped into Kaoru he grinned though, covering his nervousness. Although Kaoru's first intention was to strangle his half-brother, he only displayed a smug smile. "I talked to father. Die is mine and if I ever catch you laying hands on him again, you'll have to face the consequences." He tried to appear all self-confident, tried not to give away too much about his true feelings for the redheaded slave although he was quite sure that Tanaka had guessed them already anyways.
"He's yours?" Tanaka stressed the last word, arching an eyebrow. "Whatever. Just don't get too attached to him." He couldn't hide that he was less than pleased, even feeling somewhat defeated.
Before he could turn around, Kaoru grabbed his arm, his fingers digging deep into the flesh. "If you ever hurt him again, I will do the same to you," he hissed, making sure that nobody else could hear him. Then, he smiled brightly, almost merrily, as if nothing had happened and released his brother from his grasp. "Father said that there's enough slaves around and since I spotted him first, I am allowed to have him as my favourite."
"I bet he would grant you anything." Jealousy was dripping from the younger brother's voice, along with hatred. "Go and have fun with that slave of yours. But remember my words: you're only begging for troubles."
For a short moment, Kaoru showed his true innermost, narrowed his eyes to small slits and pierced Tanaka with his gaze. "Be careful whom you're messing with. You're no match for me." With having said that, he turned around and left the other man standing alone in the middle of the room. After that, Kaoru needed some workout to regain control over the hatred that had sneaked into his mind and soul.
He knew untamed feelings like that would only lead to making mistakes and that would endanger not only him, but the redhead too. So he left the palace and went outside to run a few paces and to train his hits with a dummy. Tanaka knew better than to go straight to his father to complain. Kaoru had always been the favourite son, and if there was only his word against his older brother's, there was no doubt who'd win. So he just patiently remained silent, watching, and swore he'd have his revenge one day, one way or another.
Kaoru didn't feel like attending dinner that night and went to his chambers directly, ordering a servant to bring him something to eat. Time was creeping by slowly and so he dug out a book to study a bit. He had chosen a book about the country's laws and went straight to the paragraphs about slaves.
Die couldn't deny that he was a bit disappointed when he didn't spot Kaoru at dinner, but he was so busy that it wouldn't have made much difference anyways. It somehow felt like an eternity before the evening arrived, time passing ever so slowly.
Kaoru had put the book aside longest and now simply sat in his chair, staring into the distance. He was thinking about how it would be once he held the other man in his arms again. Would it be as natural as the night before or would they feel awkward? He was a bit afraid that Die felt obliged to him and wouldn't openly admit if he wasn't comfortable with the situation.
The redhead was insecure as he finally stood in front of the young master's door, his hand on the handle already. How would things turn out for them? Would he be able to take it if things went back to how they had been? Swallowing hard he forced himself to get a grip though, knocking on the door softly before he pushed it open.
He was greeted by a soft smile and Kaoru jumped to his feet, nervously smoothing down his clothes. "Hi." He had never had something like a date in his whole life, but imagined that it would feel just like that; his heart beating frantically in his chest since he didn't know how to react.
"Hi." The smile was returned insecurely, and because Die didn't know what to do he just staid there, not daring to approach the other man. At least this was better than being ordered straight to bed, and he dared to hope that things had indeed changed for the better. He just wanted to forget what had happened, forcing the bad memories away and concentrated on the hopefully brighter future.
For a long moment, they just stood there, not even looking at each other directly. But then, Kaoru snapped back to reality and smiled. "Don't you want to sit down? Do you want something to drink?" Before Die could answer, he had filled two goblets with wine and handed one to the younger man.
One could clearly see how surprised the redhead was, as this was all so new to him. No one had ever offered him a drink like that, neither asked him what he wanted to do. "Thank you." Still somewhat nervous, he moved to sit down on the edge of the bed since there were no other chairs than the one beside the table.
Kaoru sat down beside him, nervously taking a huge gulp from his wine. Then, he looked up and smiled. "I talked to my father today..."
"Oh..." Die turned to look at the other man from the corner of his eyes. "About what?" He didn't know what gave him the courage to even ask, but somehow it felt like Kaoru even expected it from him. That was when his instincts kicked in, and he got the question out clear, despite his voice being somewhat silent.
"About you." The smile widened a bit and Kaoru couldn't deny that he liked to keep the redhead on tenterhooks. But then, he became a bit more serious and went on. "You won't have to spend your night with anybody else anymore. I mean," he chuckled nervously, "you can sleep here safely and won't have to..."
The younger man was surprised, but pleasantly this time. He smiled at his friend, looking him straight in the eye. Another thing that made him feel a tad bit odd, but it somehow was the only thing he could do in the situation. "Thank you."
"No need to thank me." The young heir shook his head. "I had my own selfish reasons." But then, he realized how that might have sounded and hurried to explain. "But ... you don't have to. I mean, not with me... I just wanted you to be able to sleep and..." he babbled incoherently, finally taking a deep breath to sort his thoughts. "I just want to have you around. That is, if you want to be around me too."
Calmly Die rested his hand on the other man's arm, smiling at him. "Thank you, really. I appreciate it. And yes, I want to be around you too." His smile was a bit insecure, but he tried not to show it.
"Are we still friends?" Kaoru had to voice the question that had been nagging him for some time now. After their first more unpleasant encounters, he hadn't dared to keep his hopes up, but now found the courage to ask. The soft touch on his arm caused a hot wave to run through his body as it showed a piece of the true Daisuke, not the slave who only acted on command.
"Yeah." Die smiled. "Although most friends know each other better though. It's been so long that I don't know much how your life turned out..."
"Then ask what you want to know. Anything." The other man nodded smiling. "Go ahead."
"But I don't know what to ask..." The redhead confessed. "I've never left this place, so I have no idea how things are anywhere else."
"For the first years, I was taught the basics like maths, history, religion and politics. Then, they began to train me to become a warrior so that I would be able to lead an army once and take over my father's realm, to guarantee the safety of this country. They told me about my nobility by birth, about my duties and my rights." Kaoru smiled softly. "That's the dry facts. But I somehow thought you were interested in personal things... About how hard it was to go through all these things without you, about that I was only able to swim in the ocean because you taught me..."
"You still remember that?" Die's smile brightened instantly at the memory. "I mean when we went swimming back then."
"I was so friggin' afraid of the water, how could I have ever forgotten it?" Kaoru emptied his wine, put the goblet on the floor and then crawled on the bed, leaning against the backrest. "I would've never trusted anybody else but you to take care of me back then. And if it hadn't been for you, my father would've probably beaten the shit out of me and thrown me into the water himself."
"I liked swimming. And it was even more fun with you." The redhead admitted, taking a sip of the wine, before casting his eyes down, his expression somewhat defeated in a way. "Too bad I don't really have the opportunity to go swimming anymore."
The last comment caused a dark shadow to cloud Kaoru's eyes and he bit his lip. "We can. I just take you with me to the ocean one day and tell them I need a slave to accompany me and take care of the food and such."
"That'd be cool." Die nodded, putting the empty glass aside. "But my responsibilities are in the house... So they'd probably make someone else come with you."
"Not if I tell my father I want to have you there for other reasons too..." The young master didn't look at him, only whispered those words.
The younger man turned to look at him though, obviously not minding. "It would be nice, really. To go swimming."
"Okay. Then we will go swimming once. Just gimme time to find the perfect moment to ask my father. You know, Tanaka won't leave me alone and only waits to find the perfect opportunity to turn tables."
"Just don't get yourself into troubles. It's not worth it."
"How can you talk like this?" Kaoru snarled suddenly. "If only I had never been sent away from here. Then I would've never gotten all these confusing thoughts about slaves and humans and could've just lived with you as brothers and friends. Don't you ever dare to say again that it's not worth it. It would mean that our friendship has never been anything but a huge lie and I don't want to believe that."
"But we can't change how things are." Die looked sad, but didn't know what else to say really. "You know that they would've never allowed us to stay friends..."
"But we could've kept it a secret. I would've been there to make sure nobody ever harms you. I ... I just ..." Kaoru ran out of words, too many things that wanted to be said at once. "I would've protected you."
"I know you would've tried to." The younger man had grown somewhat pessimistic about this, telling himself it was good to only be realistic. "But it's no use thinking about it now... it's too late anyways."
In a sudden movement, Kaoru slid behind the other man and hugged him tightly. "It's never too late," he whispered, partly to convince himself. He knew how things worked in the country, knew that this was impossible, but still he strongly believed that one man could make a difference. "I'm here now, and I will do everything to regain your trust and become a worthy friend."
At first Die automatically tensed a bit, before he realized that it was only Kaoru, and there was nothing to worry about. Slowly he relaxed, a small smile curving his lips. "It really is good to have you back."
"I'm sorry I was such an asshole. I just didn't know how to react and what to say to you. I guess being apart almost ten years has changed us both a lot." The auburn haired man whispered softly, but didn't release the redhead from his embrace. It was weird how easily he could admit it now, how Die's mere presence made him see how wrong the laws were, how everything he had been taught was a huge lie. It had taken him some time, but now he saw it clearly.
"It was hard at first... when I thought you didn't remember me anymore." The younger man spoke lowly, his voice almost a mere whisper.
"I didn't want to take advantage of your position, but somehow you were so different and I was hoping to see at least a little bit of affection for me." Kaoru explained honestly. "Which is no excuse for me acting like this, I just want to be honest and tell you what was going on in my mind."
"It's okay... it's gone now." Die smiled a bit, turning his head to look at the man behind him. "We can forget about it."
"Thank you." Kaoru mirrored the smile. "How can you forgive me? You always forgave me everything while I made you beg some time when you did something wrong."
"I don't know. I guess I know you mean it when you apologize, and if you're honest, why shouldn't I forgive?" The other man shrugged a bit. It was still weird to talk with someone who was supposedly higher in rank, but he was beginning to feel more at ease with the situation slowly.
"Because I hurt your feelings?" Kaoru suggested.
"But if you apologize, then it means you know you did wrong..."
The answer caused a huge smile to spread on Kaoru's lips and he leaned his head on his friend's shoulder. "I missed you so much. You're the warmest, kindest person I've ever met, and the most honest and faithful. I promise to never disappoint you ever again."
Die almost told him not to make promises he couldn't keep, but then somehow he had the feeling that Kaoru truly meant it with all his heart. So he only smiled, nodding at the words. And it was true, Kaoru was certain that, even if the worst cases of all happened and somebody found out that he had fallen for a slave, he would never do anything to hurt Die again. Reluctantly, he released him from the embrace and went back to his former place.
It left the redhead cold, and inwardly he had to admit to himself that having the other man's arms around him made him feel content like nothing else. A bit nervously he turned to look his companion in the eye. "Want more wine? I can pour you some."
The slightly older man shook his head and smiled, his gaze fastened on Die. "I don't want any more wine. But feel free to take whatever you want. There's food too." He spoke slowly, calm, caught in the weird mood that had taken over them.
"I ate already." Die averted his gaze nervously, not knowing what to say or do. The question had been an attempt to fill the silence. "Thank you."
Kaoru noticed it and patted the empty space besides him. "Come here." He smiled openly to show Die that he didn't have any ulterior motives. Nodding slightly the redhead crawled closer, settling down on the place beside his friend.
"Why is this so awkward?" The question came with a nervous chuckle. "Everything was so natural when we were children and now we don't even know what to say."
"I don't know. Maybe it's because we were apart for so long?" Die chuckled as well. "Or then we grew up... it always complicates things."
"It does." The other man agreed and shifted a bit closer. "Maybe we should forget about that when we're in here and just act like children?"
"You mean as in me clinging to you and complaining I can't sleep?" The younger man grinned brightly.
"Yeah." Kaoru nodded hastily a couple of times, chuckling. "And in me telling you that you should grow up and get the heck away from me." He tilted his head a bit, peeking at the other through his bangs. "But then I always crawled closer, because I was just as afraid."
That was exactly what Die would've wanted to do, to crawl closer to the other man and wrap his arms around him. But he still didn't quite dare to. "But we always managed to sleep eventually."
"Yes. But it was only because we were talking until the middle of the night and then were exhausted." Kaoru smiled at him and turned around a bit to face him better. "Would you hug me again?" He grinned. "'Cause I'm still afraid of the dark."
"You liar." The redhead chuckled, but obediently did as he was told, circling his arms around the other man and hugging him tight. Involuntarily, he closed his eyes, enjoying the moment to no end.
"Got me." Kaoru gave away with a bright smile, and snuggled closer to Die. The emotionality the embrace evoked was something he wasn't used to, had never felt with anybody but the redheaded man. "Thank you."
"Thank you." Die smiled, burying his face in the other man's neck, just keeping him close. He still could've sworn that this was just a dream, too good to be true.
They were both feeling so comfortable, so perfect, that they soon just drifted off. Kaoru had wrapped one arm tightly around the other man as well, his head resting on his shoulder, the steadily rising and sinking chest lulling him to sleep. They slept extremely well there with each other, simply content to be able to share their warmth.
The next morning Die had to hurry back to his duties again. It became routine soon, Die practically sleeping every night beside Kaoru, leaving in the early morning to do his work without waking the other man up. Kaoru always felt empty when he found the redhead gone in the mornings, but there was nothing they could've done about it. However, he always made sure to accidentally cross the other man's way more than once during the day, be it to exchange a covert smile or to wink at him whenever nobody was watching.
He was working on a way to get both of them one or two days off to get to the ocean. All he needed was a believable explanation. Die had almost forgotten the whole idea about going to see to the ocean together, but he was happy nevertheless, happier than ever in these past ten years. His mother was getting more and more suspicious though, Die could sense it in her glances and words although she didn't say anything straight.
One day, the lord came to his eldest son with a plea. There were some troubles in the next city that required the presence of a sovereign. It was a nice distraction from the boring days at the palace and moreover, Kaoru used the opportunity to ask something from the older man in return. He told him that he wanted some moments alone and told him about his idea to spend a night at the beach, only him and the redheaded slave. Maybe in a week from then or whenever it suited his father's plans best. He purposefully didn't name a date, first only addressing the topic generally to see how the older man reacted.
The lord seemed to be all up for the idea and told his son that he really needed some changes from the routines and that a trip like that would be nice. As Tanaka heard of that too, he frowned seriously, suspecting that there was something behind the request, something more than a day of relaxing on the beach, especially since Kaoru wanted to take the redheaded slave with him. Still he didn't say anything and tried to act as casual as possible towards his brother.
Kaoru kept an eye on him as well, but only secretly. However, he was so glad that his father wasn't suspicious and had practically already allowed him the trip that he was grinning all day. When Die entered his chamber that evening, the huge grin was still in its place, Kaoru's eyes sparkling merrily.
"You look like something nice happened." Die had to smile as soon as he noticed the expression. With the passing days they had learned to act naturally around each other, only safely inside Kaoru's room of course though. When in public, they carefully stuck to their roles.
"Indeed." The other man nodded. "Next week, we will make a short trip to the ocean. Just you and I."
"Really?" The redhead couldn't hide his excitement, his smile so wide it almost broke his face, and his eyes sparkling happily.
"Really." Kaoru beamed. "Father didn't even address the fact that I wanted you with me. He even thought this was a good idea." Sighing, he let his upper body drop backwards on the bed, speaking to the ceiling. "I have more duties now as the heir of the realm and so he thought this would be a good distraction for me."
"Aw, it's going to be so nice!" Die sat down on the edge of the bed, beaming down at the other man. "I can't wait."
"That day," the young heir turned his head to look at his friend, "I will serve you. I will pack a picnic and take care of everything."
"Then take care that no one sees it." The younger man smiled, slowly settling down so that he was lying beside the other one.
"Nobody will be there but us. Remember our secret spot? I want to go there." Kaoru didn't worry about that somebody could see them. He was sure nobody would be there but them.
"Of course I remember it. How could I forget?" Die nodded instantly. That place held so many nice memories. They had hidden there from Kaoru's father when he wanted to drag his son to some official meeting. It had had some unpleasant consequences and even now, Kaoru still remembered how his bottom had been aching days later still. But it had always been worth the trouble and he was hoping that they could use the sentimental remembrance to spend a nice time at that spot.
Automatically Die wrapped one arm around the other man, leaning a bit closer to him even. "Do you already know which day it'll be?"
"No. But I will have some things to attend in the beginning of the week. The end is free." Naturally, Kaoru turned around more and embraced the redhead on his side. Their faces were only inches away from each other and he felt like drowning in the other man's warm brown eyes. "You can choose. What's the worst day at work?"
"Thursday." The redhead grinned instantly. "It's the laundry day."
"Then we go on Thursday." Kaoru mirrored the grin, his breath striking Die's skin, washing over his face. "It's going to be so nice."
"It is!" Die nodded. Like drawn by gravity he leaned closer until their lips were touching softly. Then he realized what he was doing and froze, staring at the other man with wide open eyes. He didn't pull back though, only waited how Kaoru would react.
First, the older one's eyes had snapped open wide and he stared at him, but then, they fell half way shut and he tentatively responded to the light contact, moving his lips against the other man's. His heart, which had first stopped beating completely, was now pounding like a drum as he ran the tip of his tongue over the lush bottom lip. Secretly, Kaoru had been waiting for this moment, had dreamed about it so often, but now couldn't believe it really happened. They had kissed before too, when he had ordered Die to bed, but it had been an emotionless, mechanical act which hadn't spoken of true affection. This here was the complete opposite and it felt like their first time.
Somehow the younger man found courage in the way Kaoru reacted and shifted a bit closer even, automatically parting his lips slightly. His heart was beating in his chest, threatening to burst it with the force, and his head was spinning due to the blissful contact. Slowly, Kaoru brought both of his hands to Die's face and rolled closer, almost lying on top of him, while he deepened the kiss. The odd feeling vanished soon, making way for the utter affection he felt towards his redheaded friend, made way for the love he felt for him.
The redhead mewled slightly into the kiss, tilting his head to be able to deepen it as much as possible. Somehow he felt like this was exactly where he belonged, where he always wanted to be. Kaoru's right hand was moving on its own, sliding down the younger man's neck, his shoulder and arm until it rested on his hip. An incredible want to feel Die's smooth skin underneath his fingertips, to really touch him, to taste and smell him rose within the young heir. Of course, he had touched him before, but hadn't dared to show his want openly, hadn't dared to enjoy it too much, because Die's whole being had always been stiff and depreciative.
This time the younger man was melting away under Kaoru's touch, as if every molecule of his being only wanted to be closer, get everything from the moment. He held his eyes closed, just enjoying the gentle kiss and tried to preserve it with all his other senses. The need for air forced them to break the contact, but Kaoru instantly went over to kiss and nibble his friend's neck. Encouraged by Die's reaction, by the fact that he silently agreed, he slowly struggled to remove his garments to finally get to feel the soft skin.
And Die helped him, desperately wanting to be closer to the other man, to get rid of the disturbing clothes that did nothing but kept them further from each other. He couldn't help but to be nervous too though, because he had never felt anything like this before, had never reacted this forcefully to even the smallest of touches.
They were squirming on the sheets until the unneeded garments finally lay on the floor, Kaoru instantly pulling the other man close against him. "Die, I want you," he whispered, although he would have rather wanted to say that he loved him. Still didn't dare, afraid the other one wouldn't feel the same.
The younger man's heart was beating fast, and he could only nod a few times, swallowing to make his voice work. Somehow it was obvious that the words spoke of more than mere lust, and that alone caused his voice to fail him. Swiftly, Kaoru crawled between the Die's legs, his lips marking the perfect skin of his neck, shoulders and chest everywhere.
He didn't want to rush, wanted to show Die how much it meant to him; wanted to please him because he was certain that nobody had ever given a damn if he had enjoyed this or not. And it was true, since never had anyone wanted Die to gain something of the shared moments as well. They had always just wanted him to provide pleasure, instead of sharing it. So despite everything, to Die this felt like a first time, everything so new to him.
Very slowly, Kaoru slid lower, never leaving the smooth skin with his lips. He had had his fair share of affairs and lust in his life, but never had fallen in love so far. Maybe he had preserved this special feeling for the redhead, subconsciously knowing that he was the only one who could elicit an emotion of that magnitude in him. The affection boosted the sensations that were closing in on him even more and the mere scent of the other man drove him mad already. Gently, he ran his teeth along the younger's hipbone, moving lower to kiss and lick the inside of his thigh.
It made the redhead shiver, a small whimper escaping him. Everything in the moment was piercing him through and through, the heat mixing with the slight nervousness into something that made his heart flutter in anticipation. He wouldn't have traded it for anything, just wanting to be near to the other man.
Kaoru had never provided somebody pleasure like this, had never shared such an intimate moment with anybody before. The sounds he elicited with every of his doings were shooting right through him, directly to his groin. It willed him on to extend this further and finally he closed his lips around Die's arousal, softly brushing his tongue across the tip.
A strangled cry escaped Die's throat and he bucked up, not able to control his movements at that instant. The first thought in his mind was that this wasn't supposed to happen, that this was against the unwritten laws. Everything he had been taught escaped his mind though when the other man repeated the action, the pleasure drowning out every ounce of doubt.
At that moment, the older man didn't think about anything but the redheaded man underneath him and what his reactions did to him. Why should something that felt so good be forbidden? After a few more moments, Kaoru withdrew though and let the arousal slip out of his mouth, unable to take the heat and pressure in his haunches any longer. He sat up a bit and gently touched the younger man's thighs, silently asking him to part them further. Instantly, Die complied and made more room for the other man. His chest was heaving with laborious breaths, his mind still occupied by the pleasure. He managed to open his eyes though, gazing directly into his lover's face, smiling at him.
That gesture alone made a wave of affection course through Kaoru and he mirrored the smile. Swiftly, he pecked Die's lips and then lifted one of his legs a bit before invading him as gently as possible. He knew that the precaution was unnecessary since Die had done this so many times before, but something in the older one still wanted to show that it could be more than just pleasant for both parties.
The redhead couldn't hold back a small groan that escaped his throat, his eyes automatically falling shut halfway. His hands found their way to the Kaoru's shoulders, running over the smooth skin and holding on to him. The nervousness was beginning to be only a distant memory, drowned out by the pleasure and the fact that it was Kaoru who was with him, no one else.
Searching for more closeness, Kaoru pushed his arms under Die's armpits and grabbed his shoulders from behind, pressing their bodies together. Slowly, he began to move inside the redhead, his thrusts tentative and gentle, yet enough to make him release husky sighs and low moans every now and then.
With each movement Die began to enjoy himself a bit more, enjoying the intensity of the feelings. When Kaoru suddenly managed to thrust in in the perfect angle, he practically screamed, gripped the other man's shoulders tight and arched up from the bed as a blinding wave of pleasure shot through him. It caused a similar feeling for Kaoru, due the clenching muscles around his hardness as a natural reaction to that. He groaned loudly, trying to hit the very same spot with every thrust from then on as he picked up the pace and force, surrendering to his body's needs.
At one point the redhead wrapped his legs around the other man's waist, urging him to just let go and take him. They were moving in perfect unison, both trying to get the most of the feelings they shared. Die was panting, trying to gasp for breath as his body began to tremble, the pressure inside becoming too much.
Even when Kaoru finally closed his eyes, he still saw the display of utmost pleasure on the other man's face. Knowing, that he himself was the reason for it caused a feeling of pride and contentment to mix with the bliss that had shut down his brains a long time ago already. Raucous confessions for his pleasure kept on spilling from his lips in sync with his laborious breaths. It was as if both of them were made for each other, soulmates. Being close, already feeling that certain tingle in his stomach, he brought his hand between their damp bodies and wrapped his fingers around the redhead's arousal. To him, it was vital to come together, to hear and feel the other man's pleasure and become a part of it.
A few incoherent words escaped the younger man along with a quiet outcry when he felt the touch. He was squirming underneath on the sheets, not knowing whether to arch up into the touch or to try to push back and meet the thrusts. It only took a few moments though before it all became too much for him to take and his whole being tensed, the climax hitting him forcefully. He cried out, the sound tearing its way from his throat without him being able to do anything about it.
Still moving his hand on him slowly, Kaoru crushed his mouth on Die's in a bruising, deep kiss as the orgasm washed over him as well, made his whole world stop turning for those few blissful seconds. Seemingly weightless, there were only the two of them in his world along with feelings his limited mind couldn't clad into words. Only when the violent tensing of his body was slowly ceasing, he finally collapsed, breathing heavily.
The younger man's muscles were still relaxing and tensing on their own, the pleasure lingering in his mind along with the last remains of the pressure that just had almost made him explode. Slowly he moved his arms around Kaoru's sweaty form, holding him close against himself, just enjoying the moment to no end.
Gooseflesh covered Kaoru's skin everywhere because he was highly sensitive for every single touch the other man gave him. It was nice to be held like that, to feel that there was somebody who protected him, if only at that moment. After some time, he slowly lifted his head, smiled at the redhead and planted a kiss somewhere on his chin.
It made Die chuckle, the sound coming from somewhere deep inside of him. He simply wasn't able to express the bubbling joy inside of him otherwise, had no words for how god he felt. Carefully, Kaoru pulled away from him and then quickly lay back down on the younger man, not willing to leave his warmth and the closeness just yet. "What's so funny?" he asked, grinning a bit insecurely.
"Nothing." The younger man shook his head, a few red strands of hair getting stuck on the damp skin of his face. "You just have no idea how good you made me feel."
"If it's even half as good as you made me feel, than I'm pleased." The other man winked chuckling, reached out his hand and brushed the strands away from the redhead's face in a gentle gesture. "Thank you," he went on more serious. "I've never felt anything like this before."
"Me neither." Die smiled, looking him straight in the eye. "And no one ever really cared for how I felt..."
Suppressing the bitterness those words evoked in him, Kaoru shook his head, giving Die a huge smirk. "That will change from now on. I'm selfish and need proof that I'm the peak of the goddess' creations and thus, the most able. So I need you to come for my own ego."
"I somehow guessed that." The redhead laughed, leaning up to peck the slightly older man's lips quickly, looking at him from sparkling eyes.
"Of course." Kaoru smiled brightly and mirrored the redhead's action by kissing him shortly on his side. "All or nothing. Not doing things by halves."
"And that's one of the reasons why I love you." Die smiled brightly. Only when the words had left his lips he realized what he had said, the smile disappearing as he stared at the other man in shock for a moment. Since he said it out loud, he couldn't take it back any longer, had to admit it to himself as well. And it was true, although he hadn't been able to admit it before. He was totally, utterly in love with the other man. Slowly the smile came back to his lips, tentative and insecure though when he confirmed the words. "I love you."
Kaoru's heart missed more than one beat and he looked at the other man for a long moment before he could say anything. He had been thinking about this so many times, had imagined how he would say those words to Die, but had been too afraid to be rejected or that the other man could just play along only to follow the rules of slavery and speak the master's mind. But there Die was, pre-empting him as if it was the most natural thing on earth. After swallowing a couple of times, Kaoru cupped Die's cheek in his hand, returning the gaze openly. "I love you too. I think I always have, but only realized it when I saw you again, when I was so jealous to see you leave with another man to spend the night with him."
"You should know the others don't mean anything to me." Die smiled softly, leaning a bit into the touch, enjoying the simple contact endlessly. Somehow, it was a huge relief to say the words out loud, to admit his own feelings to both himself and the other man.
Now that it was out in the open, that they both were sure they shared the same feelings for each other, the desperation of their situation became fully clear to Kaoru. He pushed his fears aside though, determined to enjoy this moment. "I know it now, but back then, I thought you were flirting with them while I had expected you to be there for me only."
"You know, I was just happy that you're there," the younger man admitted honestly. "And I know I should try to cover it, since people can notice..."
"I should've known that." The older man's voice was a mere whisper. "But now I will make it up to you for the past ten years, for everybody who spent a night with you without paying respect to the fact that he held the most precious person in his arms."
"Kaoru?" Die searched for the other man's gaze, as he called him by his name probably for the first time after they met again. "It really doesn't matter anymore. Past is gone and I'm glad to have you here now."
The statement elicited a warm smile from the older man and he answered with a soft kiss. "Thank you," he breathed out after they parted, wrapped his arms around the redhead who had been his friend but now was his lover, and rolled over until the other man lay on top of him. "Thank you so much."
"I didn't even do anything." The younger man chuckled a bit, closing his eyes to enjoy the way they were lying there close to each other.
"Yes, you did. You made it easy for me to tell you that I love you. I've been afraid to admit it," Kaoru gave away with a small smile.
"Me too," the other man confessed. "And I didn't intend to say it... it was an accident." He lifted his head to look at his lover. "It's true though."
"Then I'm glad it slipped you." Kaoru grinned. "You've always been talking before thinking. I never thought it could be a good thing." Slowly, he glided his palms down the other man's back all the way to his butt. "Though I never thought you'd become this gorgeous either..."
"I know. Who would've guessed?" Die grinned self confidently. It was something only Kaoru made him feel usually, that he could be himself without the need to either be the humble slave or try to get along with others in similar positions.
"Arrogant bastard." The older man chuckled and leaned heavily into the cushions. Although it was already late at night, he didn't feel sleepy at all, but since Die would have a long day of work ahead of him, he thought they should slowly try to get some rest. The younger man was happily exhausted, and as he rested there comfortably, listening to Kaoru's heartbeat, it didn't take long before he was drifting off to sleep.
Kaoru watched him silently for a long time, absent-mindedly caressing his back. He couldn't deny that he feared the moment when somebody would find out about them. Because one thing was certain; it was impossible to hide this forever. They would have to try their best though to enjoy their time together to the fullest. The thing that worried him the most was that their love really endangered the younger man's life. People didn't hesitate long when it came to disobedient slaves.
It had happened before, although not often. Every time it had come to the surface that a slave shared an emotional relationship with someone of a higher rank, the punishment had been death. It was a common opinion that there had to be warning examples to keep the slaves in their place, to make them know what was right and what wrong. It put a lot of pressure on Kaoru, because he was the one who endangered the life of the person he loved. There was nothing he could do against it though since he was certain he couldn't live without the other man anymore.
So in the morning, before Die could slip out of his room, he stopped him. "Die, try to keep your smile down and maybe walk a bit stiffly..." he suggested quietly, but there was a loving sparkle in his eyes that made clear he was only worried about the other man and not himself.
"Don't worry, I can do it." Die smiled honestly, leaning in to peck the other man's lips. "It's only mom I'm worried about... she can see through me."
"Don't tell her, please. I'm afraid she could be used against you once." Kaoru's hand had grabbed Die's wrist, gently holding him there still. He looked him straight in the eye for a few moments, before a soft smile appeared on his lips. "I love you."
"Love you too," the younger man replied honestly. "And don't worry, I won't tell her. But I can't promise that she wouldn't guess..."
"Now better leave before you're getting into troubles." When the redhead had already the hand on the handle, Kaoru again stopped him. "Oh, and maybe you can serve me lunch in my room today," he winked. It was a bit careless, yes, but since his father had already admitted he had had his favourite slaves too, why should he only want to use him at night? At least that would be his statement if somebody asked.
"Your wish is my command." Die chuckled, bowing playfully to his master before finally slipping out of the room. He tried hard to suppress his happy smile though and act more like he was expected to.
Author:
seinen_no and fonulynRating: NC17
Pairing: Die and Kaoru
Disclaimer: We own no one, only our dirty imaginations.
Summary: As children the son of the Lord and the slave-boy were best of friends and the most important persons in each other’s lives. That was torn apart when the son of the Lord was sent away to get his education, and the boys were denied every form of keeping in contact. What happens when they meet again after all those years, now grown to be gorgeous young men, both bound by their place in the society?
Comments:
seinen_no: Here we are again with the next chapter and some decent smut^^ I'm a bit tired. Much stress lately so I'm actually glad we have this fic done and don't need to rush. Though I feel a bit bad since we didn't have the time to start the j-roch charity fic for cadkitten yet. Summer sucks XD So yeah, on a slightly happier side, I hope you all like this chap. No drama here at least^^
fonulyn: This is probably the ‘high’ of the story, seeing how much this chapter is differing from the previous ones in mood XD It’s happier and I was at least smiling when reading it. But I’ll let you read to find out more of it x) I’m too tired to give any more coherent comment. I just hope you’ll enjoy the chappie!And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive .
Previously happened: Part 1, Part 2
Chapter 3
The rest of the day went by just like any other day, since Die had to hurry to his other duties as soon as the breakfast was over. He still was in a good mood though, thinking that in the evening he'd meet his friend again. That day, Kaoru couldn't wait for the evening to come. The past days had been boring, except for the hunt which had been a nice distraction. He just wasn't used to be lazy and sit around almost all day, but he also didn't feel like working out either since he would've preferred to spend some time with the redhead.
Although Tanaka had been totally self confident and looked even proud of himself the previous day, he now seemed to almost avoid his brother as if he was afraid of him and his reaction. As he bumped into Kaoru he grinned though, covering his nervousness. Although Kaoru's first intention was to strangle his half-brother, he only displayed a smug smile. "I talked to father. Die is mine and if I ever catch you laying hands on him again, you'll have to face the consequences." He tried to appear all self-confident, tried not to give away too much about his true feelings for the redheaded slave although he was quite sure that Tanaka had guessed them already anyways.
"He's yours?" Tanaka stressed the last word, arching an eyebrow. "Whatever. Just don't get too attached to him." He couldn't hide that he was less than pleased, even feeling somewhat defeated.
Before he could turn around, Kaoru grabbed his arm, his fingers digging deep into the flesh. "If you ever hurt him again, I will do the same to you," he hissed, making sure that nobody else could hear him. Then, he smiled brightly, almost merrily, as if nothing had happened and released his brother from his grasp. "Father said that there's enough slaves around and since I spotted him first, I am allowed to have him as my favourite."
"I bet he would grant you anything." Jealousy was dripping from the younger brother's voice, along with hatred. "Go and have fun with that slave of yours. But remember my words: you're only begging for troubles."
For a short moment, Kaoru showed his true innermost, narrowed his eyes to small slits and pierced Tanaka with his gaze. "Be careful whom you're messing with. You're no match for me." With having said that, he turned around and left the other man standing alone in the middle of the room. After that, Kaoru needed some workout to regain control over the hatred that had sneaked into his mind and soul.
He knew untamed feelings like that would only lead to making mistakes and that would endanger not only him, but the redhead too. So he left the palace and went outside to run a few paces and to train his hits with a dummy. Tanaka knew better than to go straight to his father to complain. Kaoru had always been the favourite son, and if there was only his word against his older brother's, there was no doubt who'd win. So he just patiently remained silent, watching, and swore he'd have his revenge one day, one way or another.
Kaoru didn't feel like attending dinner that night and went to his chambers directly, ordering a servant to bring him something to eat. Time was creeping by slowly and so he dug out a book to study a bit. He had chosen a book about the country's laws and went straight to the paragraphs about slaves.
Die couldn't deny that he was a bit disappointed when he didn't spot Kaoru at dinner, but he was so busy that it wouldn't have made much difference anyways. It somehow felt like an eternity before the evening arrived, time passing ever so slowly.
Kaoru had put the book aside longest and now simply sat in his chair, staring into the distance. He was thinking about how it would be once he held the other man in his arms again. Would it be as natural as the night before or would they feel awkward? He was a bit afraid that Die felt obliged to him and wouldn't openly admit if he wasn't comfortable with the situation.
The redhead was insecure as he finally stood in front of the young master's door, his hand on the handle already. How would things turn out for them? Would he be able to take it if things went back to how they had been? Swallowing hard he forced himself to get a grip though, knocking on the door softly before he pushed it open.
He was greeted by a soft smile and Kaoru jumped to his feet, nervously smoothing down his clothes. "Hi." He had never had something like a date in his whole life, but imagined that it would feel just like that; his heart beating frantically in his chest since he didn't know how to react.
"Hi." The smile was returned insecurely, and because Die didn't know what to do he just staid there, not daring to approach the other man. At least this was better than being ordered straight to bed, and he dared to hope that things had indeed changed for the better. He just wanted to forget what had happened, forcing the bad memories away and concentrated on the hopefully brighter future.
For a long moment, they just stood there, not even looking at each other directly. But then, Kaoru snapped back to reality and smiled. "Don't you want to sit down? Do you want something to drink?" Before Die could answer, he had filled two goblets with wine and handed one to the younger man.
One could clearly see how surprised the redhead was, as this was all so new to him. No one had ever offered him a drink like that, neither asked him what he wanted to do. "Thank you." Still somewhat nervous, he moved to sit down on the edge of the bed since there were no other chairs than the one beside the table.
Kaoru sat down beside him, nervously taking a huge gulp from his wine. Then, he looked up and smiled. "I talked to my father today..."
"Oh..." Die turned to look at the other man from the corner of his eyes. "About what?" He didn't know what gave him the courage to even ask, but somehow it felt like Kaoru even expected it from him. That was when his instincts kicked in, and he got the question out clear, despite his voice being somewhat silent.
"About you." The smile widened a bit and Kaoru couldn't deny that he liked to keep the redhead on tenterhooks. But then, he became a bit more serious and went on. "You won't have to spend your night with anybody else anymore. I mean," he chuckled nervously, "you can sleep here safely and won't have to..."
The younger man was surprised, but pleasantly this time. He smiled at his friend, looking him straight in the eye. Another thing that made him feel a tad bit odd, but it somehow was the only thing he could do in the situation. "Thank you."
"No need to thank me." The young heir shook his head. "I had my own selfish reasons." But then, he realized how that might have sounded and hurried to explain. "But ... you don't have to. I mean, not with me... I just wanted you to be able to sleep and..." he babbled incoherently, finally taking a deep breath to sort his thoughts. "I just want to have you around. That is, if you want to be around me too."
Calmly Die rested his hand on the other man's arm, smiling at him. "Thank you, really. I appreciate it. And yes, I want to be around you too." His smile was a bit insecure, but he tried not to show it.
"Are we still friends?" Kaoru had to voice the question that had been nagging him for some time now. After their first more unpleasant encounters, he hadn't dared to keep his hopes up, but now found the courage to ask. The soft touch on his arm caused a hot wave to run through his body as it showed a piece of the true Daisuke, not the slave who only acted on command.
"Yeah." Die smiled. "Although most friends know each other better though. It's been so long that I don't know much how your life turned out..."
"Then ask what you want to know. Anything." The other man nodded smiling. "Go ahead."
"But I don't know what to ask..." The redhead confessed. "I've never left this place, so I have no idea how things are anywhere else."
"For the first years, I was taught the basics like maths, history, religion and politics. Then, they began to train me to become a warrior so that I would be able to lead an army once and take over my father's realm, to guarantee the safety of this country. They told me about my nobility by birth, about my duties and my rights." Kaoru smiled softly. "That's the dry facts. But I somehow thought you were interested in personal things... About how hard it was to go through all these things without you, about that I was only able to swim in the ocean because you taught me..."
"You still remember that?" Die's smile brightened instantly at the memory. "I mean when we went swimming back then."
"I was so friggin' afraid of the water, how could I have ever forgotten it?" Kaoru emptied his wine, put the goblet on the floor and then crawled on the bed, leaning against the backrest. "I would've never trusted anybody else but you to take care of me back then. And if it hadn't been for you, my father would've probably beaten the shit out of me and thrown me into the water himself."
"I liked swimming. And it was even more fun with you." The redhead admitted, taking a sip of the wine, before casting his eyes down, his expression somewhat defeated in a way. "Too bad I don't really have the opportunity to go swimming anymore."
The last comment caused a dark shadow to cloud Kaoru's eyes and he bit his lip. "We can. I just take you with me to the ocean one day and tell them I need a slave to accompany me and take care of the food and such."
"That'd be cool." Die nodded, putting the empty glass aside. "But my responsibilities are in the house... So they'd probably make someone else come with you."
"Not if I tell my father I want to have you there for other reasons too..." The young master didn't look at him, only whispered those words.
The younger man turned to look at him though, obviously not minding. "It would be nice, really. To go swimming."
"Okay. Then we will go swimming once. Just gimme time to find the perfect moment to ask my father. You know, Tanaka won't leave me alone and only waits to find the perfect opportunity to turn tables."
"Just don't get yourself into troubles. It's not worth it."
"How can you talk like this?" Kaoru snarled suddenly. "If only I had never been sent away from here. Then I would've never gotten all these confusing thoughts about slaves and humans and could've just lived with you as brothers and friends. Don't you ever dare to say again that it's not worth it. It would mean that our friendship has never been anything but a huge lie and I don't want to believe that."
"But we can't change how things are." Die looked sad, but didn't know what else to say really. "You know that they would've never allowed us to stay friends..."
"But we could've kept it a secret. I would've been there to make sure nobody ever harms you. I ... I just ..." Kaoru ran out of words, too many things that wanted to be said at once. "I would've protected you."
"I know you would've tried to." The younger man had grown somewhat pessimistic about this, telling himself it was good to only be realistic. "But it's no use thinking about it now... it's too late anyways."
In a sudden movement, Kaoru slid behind the other man and hugged him tightly. "It's never too late," he whispered, partly to convince himself. He knew how things worked in the country, knew that this was impossible, but still he strongly believed that one man could make a difference. "I'm here now, and I will do everything to regain your trust and become a worthy friend."
At first Die automatically tensed a bit, before he realized that it was only Kaoru, and there was nothing to worry about. Slowly he relaxed, a small smile curving his lips. "It really is good to have you back."
"I'm sorry I was such an asshole. I just didn't know how to react and what to say to you. I guess being apart almost ten years has changed us both a lot." The auburn haired man whispered softly, but didn't release the redhead from his embrace. It was weird how easily he could admit it now, how Die's mere presence made him see how wrong the laws were, how everything he had been taught was a huge lie. It had taken him some time, but now he saw it clearly.
"It was hard at first... when I thought you didn't remember me anymore." The younger man spoke lowly, his voice almost a mere whisper.
"I didn't want to take advantage of your position, but somehow you were so different and I was hoping to see at least a little bit of affection for me." Kaoru explained honestly. "Which is no excuse for me acting like this, I just want to be honest and tell you what was going on in my mind."
"It's okay... it's gone now." Die smiled a bit, turning his head to look at the man behind him. "We can forget about it."
"Thank you." Kaoru mirrored the smile. "How can you forgive me? You always forgave me everything while I made you beg some time when you did something wrong."
"I don't know. I guess I know you mean it when you apologize, and if you're honest, why shouldn't I forgive?" The other man shrugged a bit. It was still weird to talk with someone who was supposedly higher in rank, but he was beginning to feel more at ease with the situation slowly.
"Because I hurt your feelings?" Kaoru suggested.
"But if you apologize, then it means you know you did wrong..."
The answer caused a huge smile to spread on Kaoru's lips and he leaned his head on his friend's shoulder. "I missed you so much. You're the warmest, kindest person I've ever met, and the most honest and faithful. I promise to never disappoint you ever again."
Die almost told him not to make promises he couldn't keep, but then somehow he had the feeling that Kaoru truly meant it with all his heart. So he only smiled, nodding at the words. And it was true, Kaoru was certain that, even if the worst cases of all happened and somebody found out that he had fallen for a slave, he would never do anything to hurt Die again. Reluctantly, he released him from the embrace and went back to his former place.
It left the redhead cold, and inwardly he had to admit to himself that having the other man's arms around him made him feel content like nothing else. A bit nervously he turned to look his companion in the eye. "Want more wine? I can pour you some."
The slightly older man shook his head and smiled, his gaze fastened on Die. "I don't want any more wine. But feel free to take whatever you want. There's food too." He spoke slowly, calm, caught in the weird mood that had taken over them.
"I ate already." Die averted his gaze nervously, not knowing what to say or do. The question had been an attempt to fill the silence. "Thank you."
Kaoru noticed it and patted the empty space besides him. "Come here." He smiled openly to show Die that he didn't have any ulterior motives. Nodding slightly the redhead crawled closer, settling down on the place beside his friend.
"Why is this so awkward?" The question came with a nervous chuckle. "Everything was so natural when we were children and now we don't even know what to say."
"I don't know. Maybe it's because we were apart for so long?" Die chuckled as well. "Or then we grew up... it always complicates things."
"It does." The other man agreed and shifted a bit closer. "Maybe we should forget about that when we're in here and just act like children?"
"You mean as in me clinging to you and complaining I can't sleep?" The younger man grinned brightly.
"Yeah." Kaoru nodded hastily a couple of times, chuckling. "And in me telling you that you should grow up and get the heck away from me." He tilted his head a bit, peeking at the other through his bangs. "But then I always crawled closer, because I was just as afraid."
That was exactly what Die would've wanted to do, to crawl closer to the other man and wrap his arms around him. But he still didn't quite dare to. "But we always managed to sleep eventually."
"Yes. But it was only because we were talking until the middle of the night and then were exhausted." Kaoru smiled at him and turned around a bit to face him better. "Would you hug me again?" He grinned. "'Cause I'm still afraid of the dark."
"You liar." The redhead chuckled, but obediently did as he was told, circling his arms around the other man and hugging him tight. Involuntarily, he closed his eyes, enjoying the moment to no end.
"Got me." Kaoru gave away with a bright smile, and snuggled closer to Die. The emotionality the embrace evoked was something he wasn't used to, had never felt with anybody but the redheaded man. "Thank you."
"Thank you." Die smiled, burying his face in the other man's neck, just keeping him close. He still could've sworn that this was just a dream, too good to be true.
They were both feeling so comfortable, so perfect, that they soon just drifted off. Kaoru had wrapped one arm tightly around the other man as well, his head resting on his shoulder, the steadily rising and sinking chest lulling him to sleep. They slept extremely well there with each other, simply content to be able to share their warmth.
The next morning Die had to hurry back to his duties again. It became routine soon, Die practically sleeping every night beside Kaoru, leaving in the early morning to do his work without waking the other man up. Kaoru always felt empty when he found the redhead gone in the mornings, but there was nothing they could've done about it. However, he always made sure to accidentally cross the other man's way more than once during the day, be it to exchange a covert smile or to wink at him whenever nobody was watching.
He was working on a way to get both of them one or two days off to get to the ocean. All he needed was a believable explanation. Die had almost forgotten the whole idea about going to see to the ocean together, but he was happy nevertheless, happier than ever in these past ten years. His mother was getting more and more suspicious though, Die could sense it in her glances and words although she didn't say anything straight.
One day, the lord came to his eldest son with a plea. There were some troubles in the next city that required the presence of a sovereign. It was a nice distraction from the boring days at the palace and moreover, Kaoru used the opportunity to ask something from the older man in return. He told him that he wanted some moments alone and told him about his idea to spend a night at the beach, only him and the redheaded slave. Maybe in a week from then or whenever it suited his father's plans best. He purposefully didn't name a date, first only addressing the topic generally to see how the older man reacted.
The lord seemed to be all up for the idea and told his son that he really needed some changes from the routines and that a trip like that would be nice. As Tanaka heard of that too, he frowned seriously, suspecting that there was something behind the request, something more than a day of relaxing on the beach, especially since Kaoru wanted to take the redheaded slave with him. Still he didn't say anything and tried to act as casual as possible towards his brother.
Kaoru kept an eye on him as well, but only secretly. However, he was so glad that his father wasn't suspicious and had practically already allowed him the trip that he was grinning all day. When Die entered his chamber that evening, the huge grin was still in its place, Kaoru's eyes sparkling merrily.
"You look like something nice happened." Die had to smile as soon as he noticed the expression. With the passing days they had learned to act naturally around each other, only safely inside Kaoru's room of course though. When in public, they carefully stuck to their roles.
"Indeed." The other man nodded. "Next week, we will make a short trip to the ocean. Just you and I."
"Really?" The redhead couldn't hide his excitement, his smile so wide it almost broke his face, and his eyes sparkling happily.
"Really." Kaoru beamed. "Father didn't even address the fact that I wanted you with me. He even thought this was a good idea." Sighing, he let his upper body drop backwards on the bed, speaking to the ceiling. "I have more duties now as the heir of the realm and so he thought this would be a good distraction for me."
"Aw, it's going to be so nice!" Die sat down on the edge of the bed, beaming down at the other man. "I can't wait."
"That day," the young heir turned his head to look at his friend, "I will serve you. I will pack a picnic and take care of everything."
"Then take care that no one sees it." The younger man smiled, slowly settling down so that he was lying beside the other one.
"Nobody will be there but us. Remember our secret spot? I want to go there." Kaoru didn't worry about that somebody could see them. He was sure nobody would be there but them.
"Of course I remember it. How could I forget?" Die nodded instantly. That place held so many nice memories. They had hidden there from Kaoru's father when he wanted to drag his son to some official meeting. It had had some unpleasant consequences and even now, Kaoru still remembered how his bottom had been aching days later still. But it had always been worth the trouble and he was hoping that they could use the sentimental remembrance to spend a nice time at that spot.
Automatically Die wrapped one arm around the other man, leaning a bit closer to him even. "Do you already know which day it'll be?"
"No. But I will have some things to attend in the beginning of the week. The end is free." Naturally, Kaoru turned around more and embraced the redhead on his side. Their faces were only inches away from each other and he felt like drowning in the other man's warm brown eyes. "You can choose. What's the worst day at work?"
"Thursday." The redhead grinned instantly. "It's the laundry day."
"Then we go on Thursday." Kaoru mirrored the grin, his breath striking Die's skin, washing over his face. "It's going to be so nice."
"It is!" Die nodded. Like drawn by gravity he leaned closer until their lips were touching softly. Then he realized what he was doing and froze, staring at the other man with wide open eyes. He didn't pull back though, only waited how Kaoru would react.
First, the older one's eyes had snapped open wide and he stared at him, but then, they fell half way shut and he tentatively responded to the light contact, moving his lips against the other man's. His heart, which had first stopped beating completely, was now pounding like a drum as he ran the tip of his tongue over the lush bottom lip. Secretly, Kaoru had been waiting for this moment, had dreamed about it so often, but now couldn't believe it really happened. They had kissed before too, when he had ordered Die to bed, but it had been an emotionless, mechanical act which hadn't spoken of true affection. This here was the complete opposite and it felt like their first time.
Somehow the younger man found courage in the way Kaoru reacted and shifted a bit closer even, automatically parting his lips slightly. His heart was beating in his chest, threatening to burst it with the force, and his head was spinning due to the blissful contact. Slowly, Kaoru brought both of his hands to Die's face and rolled closer, almost lying on top of him, while he deepened the kiss. The odd feeling vanished soon, making way for the utter affection he felt towards his redheaded friend, made way for the love he felt for him.
The redhead mewled slightly into the kiss, tilting his head to be able to deepen it as much as possible. Somehow he felt like this was exactly where he belonged, where he always wanted to be. Kaoru's right hand was moving on its own, sliding down the younger man's neck, his shoulder and arm until it rested on his hip. An incredible want to feel Die's smooth skin underneath his fingertips, to really touch him, to taste and smell him rose within the young heir. Of course, he had touched him before, but hadn't dared to show his want openly, hadn't dared to enjoy it too much, because Die's whole being had always been stiff and depreciative.
This time the younger man was melting away under Kaoru's touch, as if every molecule of his being only wanted to be closer, get everything from the moment. He held his eyes closed, just enjoying the gentle kiss and tried to preserve it with all his other senses. The need for air forced them to break the contact, but Kaoru instantly went over to kiss and nibble his friend's neck. Encouraged by Die's reaction, by the fact that he silently agreed, he slowly struggled to remove his garments to finally get to feel the soft skin.
And Die helped him, desperately wanting to be closer to the other man, to get rid of the disturbing clothes that did nothing but kept them further from each other. He couldn't help but to be nervous too though, because he had never felt anything like this before, had never reacted this forcefully to even the smallest of touches.
They were squirming on the sheets until the unneeded garments finally lay on the floor, Kaoru instantly pulling the other man close against him. "Die, I want you," he whispered, although he would have rather wanted to say that he loved him. Still didn't dare, afraid the other one wouldn't feel the same.
The younger man's heart was beating fast, and he could only nod a few times, swallowing to make his voice work. Somehow it was obvious that the words spoke of more than mere lust, and that alone caused his voice to fail him. Swiftly, Kaoru crawled between the Die's legs, his lips marking the perfect skin of his neck, shoulders and chest everywhere.
He didn't want to rush, wanted to show Die how much it meant to him; wanted to please him because he was certain that nobody had ever given a damn if he had enjoyed this or not. And it was true, since never had anyone wanted Die to gain something of the shared moments as well. They had always just wanted him to provide pleasure, instead of sharing it. So despite everything, to Die this felt like a first time, everything so new to him.
Very slowly, Kaoru slid lower, never leaving the smooth skin with his lips. He had had his fair share of affairs and lust in his life, but never had fallen in love so far. Maybe he had preserved this special feeling for the redhead, subconsciously knowing that he was the only one who could elicit an emotion of that magnitude in him. The affection boosted the sensations that were closing in on him even more and the mere scent of the other man drove him mad already. Gently, he ran his teeth along the younger's hipbone, moving lower to kiss and lick the inside of his thigh.
It made the redhead shiver, a small whimper escaping him. Everything in the moment was piercing him through and through, the heat mixing with the slight nervousness into something that made his heart flutter in anticipation. He wouldn't have traded it for anything, just wanting to be near to the other man.
Kaoru had never provided somebody pleasure like this, had never shared such an intimate moment with anybody before. The sounds he elicited with every of his doings were shooting right through him, directly to his groin. It willed him on to extend this further and finally he closed his lips around Die's arousal, softly brushing his tongue across the tip.
A strangled cry escaped Die's throat and he bucked up, not able to control his movements at that instant. The first thought in his mind was that this wasn't supposed to happen, that this was against the unwritten laws. Everything he had been taught escaped his mind though when the other man repeated the action, the pleasure drowning out every ounce of doubt.
At that moment, the older man didn't think about anything but the redheaded man underneath him and what his reactions did to him. Why should something that felt so good be forbidden? After a few more moments, Kaoru withdrew though and let the arousal slip out of his mouth, unable to take the heat and pressure in his haunches any longer. He sat up a bit and gently touched the younger man's thighs, silently asking him to part them further. Instantly, Die complied and made more room for the other man. His chest was heaving with laborious breaths, his mind still occupied by the pleasure. He managed to open his eyes though, gazing directly into his lover's face, smiling at him.
That gesture alone made a wave of affection course through Kaoru and he mirrored the smile. Swiftly, he pecked Die's lips and then lifted one of his legs a bit before invading him as gently as possible. He knew that the precaution was unnecessary since Die had done this so many times before, but something in the older one still wanted to show that it could be more than just pleasant for both parties.
The redhead couldn't hold back a small groan that escaped his throat, his eyes automatically falling shut halfway. His hands found their way to the Kaoru's shoulders, running over the smooth skin and holding on to him. The nervousness was beginning to be only a distant memory, drowned out by the pleasure and the fact that it was Kaoru who was with him, no one else.
Searching for more closeness, Kaoru pushed his arms under Die's armpits and grabbed his shoulders from behind, pressing their bodies together. Slowly, he began to move inside the redhead, his thrusts tentative and gentle, yet enough to make him release husky sighs and low moans every now and then.
With each movement Die began to enjoy himself a bit more, enjoying the intensity of the feelings. When Kaoru suddenly managed to thrust in in the perfect angle, he practically screamed, gripped the other man's shoulders tight and arched up from the bed as a blinding wave of pleasure shot through him. It caused a similar feeling for Kaoru, due the clenching muscles around his hardness as a natural reaction to that. He groaned loudly, trying to hit the very same spot with every thrust from then on as he picked up the pace and force, surrendering to his body's needs.
At one point the redhead wrapped his legs around the other man's waist, urging him to just let go and take him. They were moving in perfect unison, both trying to get the most of the feelings they shared. Die was panting, trying to gasp for breath as his body began to tremble, the pressure inside becoming too much.
Even when Kaoru finally closed his eyes, he still saw the display of utmost pleasure on the other man's face. Knowing, that he himself was the reason for it caused a feeling of pride and contentment to mix with the bliss that had shut down his brains a long time ago already. Raucous confessions for his pleasure kept on spilling from his lips in sync with his laborious breaths. It was as if both of them were made for each other, soulmates. Being close, already feeling that certain tingle in his stomach, he brought his hand between their damp bodies and wrapped his fingers around the redhead's arousal. To him, it was vital to come together, to hear and feel the other man's pleasure and become a part of it.
A few incoherent words escaped the younger man along with a quiet outcry when he felt the touch. He was squirming underneath on the sheets, not knowing whether to arch up into the touch or to try to push back and meet the thrusts. It only took a few moments though before it all became too much for him to take and his whole being tensed, the climax hitting him forcefully. He cried out, the sound tearing its way from his throat without him being able to do anything about it.
Still moving his hand on him slowly, Kaoru crushed his mouth on Die's in a bruising, deep kiss as the orgasm washed over him as well, made his whole world stop turning for those few blissful seconds. Seemingly weightless, there were only the two of them in his world along with feelings his limited mind couldn't clad into words. Only when the violent tensing of his body was slowly ceasing, he finally collapsed, breathing heavily.
The younger man's muscles were still relaxing and tensing on their own, the pleasure lingering in his mind along with the last remains of the pressure that just had almost made him explode. Slowly he moved his arms around Kaoru's sweaty form, holding him close against himself, just enjoying the moment to no end.
Gooseflesh covered Kaoru's skin everywhere because he was highly sensitive for every single touch the other man gave him. It was nice to be held like that, to feel that there was somebody who protected him, if only at that moment. After some time, he slowly lifted his head, smiled at the redhead and planted a kiss somewhere on his chin.
It made Die chuckle, the sound coming from somewhere deep inside of him. He simply wasn't able to express the bubbling joy inside of him otherwise, had no words for how god he felt. Carefully, Kaoru pulled away from him and then quickly lay back down on the younger man, not willing to leave his warmth and the closeness just yet. "What's so funny?" he asked, grinning a bit insecurely.
"Nothing." The younger man shook his head, a few red strands of hair getting stuck on the damp skin of his face. "You just have no idea how good you made me feel."
"If it's even half as good as you made me feel, than I'm pleased." The other man winked chuckling, reached out his hand and brushed the strands away from the redhead's face in a gentle gesture. "Thank you," he went on more serious. "I've never felt anything like this before."
"Me neither." Die smiled, looking him straight in the eye. "And no one ever really cared for how I felt..."
Suppressing the bitterness those words evoked in him, Kaoru shook his head, giving Die a huge smirk. "That will change from now on. I'm selfish and need proof that I'm the peak of the goddess' creations and thus, the most able. So I need you to come for my own ego."
"I somehow guessed that." The redhead laughed, leaning up to peck the slightly older man's lips quickly, looking at him from sparkling eyes.
"Of course." Kaoru smiled brightly and mirrored the redhead's action by kissing him shortly on his side. "All or nothing. Not doing things by halves."
"And that's one of the reasons why I love you." Die smiled brightly. Only when the words had left his lips he realized what he had said, the smile disappearing as he stared at the other man in shock for a moment. Since he said it out loud, he couldn't take it back any longer, had to admit it to himself as well. And it was true, although he hadn't been able to admit it before. He was totally, utterly in love with the other man. Slowly the smile came back to his lips, tentative and insecure though when he confirmed the words. "I love you."
Kaoru's heart missed more than one beat and he looked at the other man for a long moment before he could say anything. He had been thinking about this so many times, had imagined how he would say those words to Die, but had been too afraid to be rejected or that the other man could just play along only to follow the rules of slavery and speak the master's mind. But there Die was, pre-empting him as if it was the most natural thing on earth. After swallowing a couple of times, Kaoru cupped Die's cheek in his hand, returning the gaze openly. "I love you too. I think I always have, but only realized it when I saw you again, when I was so jealous to see you leave with another man to spend the night with him."
"You should know the others don't mean anything to me." Die smiled softly, leaning a bit into the touch, enjoying the simple contact endlessly. Somehow, it was a huge relief to say the words out loud, to admit his own feelings to both himself and the other man.
Now that it was out in the open, that they both were sure they shared the same feelings for each other, the desperation of their situation became fully clear to Kaoru. He pushed his fears aside though, determined to enjoy this moment. "I know it now, but back then, I thought you were flirting with them while I had expected you to be there for me only."
"You know, I was just happy that you're there," the younger man admitted honestly. "And I know I should try to cover it, since people can notice..."
"I should've known that." The older man's voice was a mere whisper. "But now I will make it up to you for the past ten years, for everybody who spent a night with you without paying respect to the fact that he held the most precious person in his arms."
"Kaoru?" Die searched for the other man's gaze, as he called him by his name probably for the first time after they met again. "It really doesn't matter anymore. Past is gone and I'm glad to have you here now."
The statement elicited a warm smile from the older man and he answered with a soft kiss. "Thank you," he breathed out after they parted, wrapped his arms around the redhead who had been his friend but now was his lover, and rolled over until the other man lay on top of him. "Thank you so much."
"I didn't even do anything." The younger man chuckled a bit, closing his eyes to enjoy the way they were lying there close to each other.
"Yes, you did. You made it easy for me to tell you that I love you. I've been afraid to admit it," Kaoru gave away with a small smile.
"Me too," the other man confessed. "And I didn't intend to say it... it was an accident." He lifted his head to look at his lover. "It's true though."
"Then I'm glad it slipped you." Kaoru grinned. "You've always been talking before thinking. I never thought it could be a good thing." Slowly, he glided his palms down the other man's back all the way to his butt. "Though I never thought you'd become this gorgeous either..."
"I know. Who would've guessed?" Die grinned self confidently. It was something only Kaoru made him feel usually, that he could be himself without the need to either be the humble slave or try to get along with others in similar positions.
"Arrogant bastard." The older man chuckled and leaned heavily into the cushions. Although it was already late at night, he didn't feel sleepy at all, but since Die would have a long day of work ahead of him, he thought they should slowly try to get some rest. The younger man was happily exhausted, and as he rested there comfortably, listening to Kaoru's heartbeat, it didn't take long before he was drifting off to sleep.
Kaoru watched him silently for a long time, absent-mindedly caressing his back. He couldn't deny that he feared the moment when somebody would find out about them. Because one thing was certain; it was impossible to hide this forever. They would have to try their best though to enjoy their time together to the fullest. The thing that worried him the most was that their love really endangered the younger man's life. People didn't hesitate long when it came to disobedient slaves.
It had happened before, although not often. Every time it had come to the surface that a slave shared an emotional relationship with someone of a higher rank, the punishment had been death. It was a common opinion that there had to be warning examples to keep the slaves in their place, to make them know what was right and what wrong. It put a lot of pressure on Kaoru, because he was the one who endangered the life of the person he loved. There was nothing he could do against it though since he was certain he couldn't live without the other man anymore.
So in the morning, before Die could slip out of his room, he stopped him. "Die, try to keep your smile down and maybe walk a bit stiffly..." he suggested quietly, but there was a loving sparkle in his eyes that made clear he was only worried about the other man and not himself.
"Don't worry, I can do it." Die smiled honestly, leaning in to peck the other man's lips. "It's only mom I'm worried about... she can see through me."
"Don't tell her, please. I'm afraid she could be used against you once." Kaoru's hand had grabbed Die's wrist, gently holding him there still. He looked him straight in the eye for a few moments, before a soft smile appeared on his lips. "I love you."
"Love you too," the younger man replied honestly. "And don't worry, I won't tell her. But I can't promise that she wouldn't guess..."
"Now better leave before you're getting into troubles." When the redhead had already the hand on the handle, Kaoru again stopped him. "Oh, and maybe you can serve me lunch in my room today," he winked. It was a bit careless, yes, but since his father had already admitted he had had his favourite slaves too, why should he only want to use him at night? At least that would be his statement if somebody asked.
"Your wish is my command." Die chuckled, bowing playfully to his master before finally slipping out of the room. He tried hard to suppress his happy smile though and act more like he was expected to.
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heh, and update when you can x) don't get into accidents or something XD we can wait (more or less we can XDD)
anyway, feel better soon, and tell fonulyn she's dooing a great job with the students :3
*hugs again*
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Yeah, actually I'm feeling much better now. I got some pills and I'm positive that things will work out. So now, I can start to resume my normal life and can work on doing all the stuff that's been neglected when I was freaking about my health.
I feel a bit stupid now that I was so freaked out, but then, I really felt like I had to die instantly XD
Gods, and your praising makes me blush^^