rabenhorst | [fic] Minho/Key – SHINee – Resurgence

Crossposts: http://rabenhorst.livejournal.com/100645.html

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[fic] Minho/Key – SHINee – Resurgence – Chapter 7/8

Title: Resurgence
Author:

fonulyn
Rating: NC17
Warnings: infidelity
Pairing: Minho/Key
Characters: Minho, Key, OCs
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Some mistakes can’t be avoided, even when they keep repeating over and over again. The thing is, Minho doesn’t even really want to avoid falling into the same old trap. That is what makes it Minho’s biggest mistake. What makes him Minho’s biggest mistake.
Comments: I promised a speedy update so here :3 this chapter was extremely emotional for me to write. it’s one of the first scenes I planned, and one of the scenes I hope do make an impact the way I intended. here’s to hoping it works! :3

DW
Part I Part II Part III Part IV Part V Part VI

“Minho, please, what’s going on?” Kibum asks for maybe the sixth time after he opened the door to find Minho standing on his doorstep, eyes swollen and reddened, barely holding himself together. Exactly like before, he simply gets silenced by lips on his, by Minho’s palms urgently sliding underneath his shirt to push it up and off his form.

It’s obvious that Minho is shaken, badly so, but he also doesn’t want to talk about it and it leaves Kibum confused, helpless as he tries to figure out what to do. The insistent mouth is back on his and he finally decides to throw himself into it. If this is what Minho needs right now, this is what he will give him. Maybe later he can get Minho to calm down, finally manages to draw some answers from him. But it’s obvious it’s not happening now, not right at this instant.

He allows Minho to guide him into the bedroom, doesn’t resist as his pants are unbuttoned and follow his shirt to the floor. It feels like every single touch of Minho’s long fingers is burning on his skin, like there’s a message he’s trying to convey through every longing caress. Minho throws Kibum down on the mattress, kisses a trail up the line of his leg from the kneecap to his hipbone. It all makes Kibum shudder with the intensity, but that’s not what shakes him to the core.

What gets to him the most is how it makes him feel underneath the shallow pleasure. How it makes him feel exposed in a way he’s never been before, how it makes him vulnerable.

If it was anyone but Minho Kibum would’ve already stopped this, kicking and screaming, would’ve thrown a tantrum and covered the feeling with the sarcastic and flashy front he likes to pull up whenever convenient. He doesn’t like feeling dependent on others, much less like he’s placing himself in a position where he can be hurt.

Yet he twines his fingers into Minho’s hair and pulls him up for a slow kiss, parts his thighs and offers all of himself. It might be the stupidest thing he’s ever done, to bare his very soul for Minho with his every movement, or it could be the best decision of his life. He doesn’t know, and he doubts he’ll ever find out.

Neither of them knows how they manage to work Minho’s clothes off him but once there’s only the glorious feeling of skin on skin they stop thinking altogether. It’s like all the unspoken affection, every year of their path thus far, escalates into this very moment. The way Minho kisses is gentle, only a hint of desperation laced in it, the way he touches is like he’s trying to cherish every millisecond he’s given.

It’s exhilarating, makes Kibum feel like he’s floating already long before he’s shaking on three fingers worked knuckle deep inside of him. He has never begged, not even once and not of anyone, but that means just one more rule broken tonight. It seems like that’s exactly what Minho is waiting for as the moment he hears the shakily uttered please he withdraws his hand and takes the much needed step forward.

Kibum holds his breath as he focuses on the slide that joins their bodies, his fingers gripping Minho’s biceps so hard the skin turns white in his grip. There are droplets of sweat beading on Minho’s shoulders and chest, rolling down over his collarbone and Kibum wants to follow the trail with his lips. All he can do though is stay back and take what he’s given, especially when large hands grab his hips to lift them up higher.

One of Kibum’s legs is thrown over Minho’s shoulder, the other curled around his back with its heel digging into Minho’s spine. It keeps their bodies close with every single thrust that follows, takes the power out of the movements but leaves behind a lingering intensity neither of them can handle. Breathing gets harder for Kibum when he’s practically folded by Minho leaning closer but he doesn’t care, doesn’t even notice, not when he’s kissed in a way that seems to blow away all his worries.

They’ve come a long way from their first encounter. There’s nothing in this that would correlate with the rough burst of lust and passion, wherein now the sensations run that much deeper, weave them together into a web of emotion.

When Kibum finally finds his release he can barely distinguish the sound that tears from his own throat. It feels like it’s lingering in another world, behind a curtain that mutes everything. Seconds later he feels Minho tense against him, as they collapse into a sweaty heap of long, tangled limbs.

It’s a lot later when Minho pulls back, just enough to look at Kibum. He brushes a wet strand of hair off Kibum’s forehead and offers him a tentative smile, one that is eagerly returned. Kibum can’t help the worry, though, can’t forget the way Minho looked at him when he stood at the door begging for Kibum to let him in.

“Minho?” Kibum whispers and reaches out, places his palm on Minho’s cheek and caresses the soft skin with his thumb. “Talk to me?” His voice is laced with genuine worry and he hopes it comes across. He desperately wants to help, to make everything better.

Then, Minho breaks down.

He drops down against Kibum and buries his face in his neck, clutches him like he’s the only lifeline left in this world. It confuses Kibum even further and all he can do is wrap his arms around Minho, hold him close and rub soothing circles in his back. He lets Minho cry until the words begin to bubble out, incoherent at first but soon followed by full sentences, finally forming an explanation.

Minho talks about everything. For the first time, he confesses how he’s always wanted to have Kibum all for himself, how he wouldn’t have even gotten married if there had been only one word from Kibum to tell him not to. He talks about his wife, how she’s never talked to him or let him talk to her, how she’s shut herself into her own world right off the bat ever since the wedding day. He talks about all the things he feels are slipping through his fingers.

And finally, he talks about what brought him over the edge today. He talks about the shock when his wife collapsed, talks about the flashing lights of the ambulance, talks about the rushing nurses and busy doctors, talks about the way she shut him out once again.

Kibum swallows around the lump in his throat and says nothing as he holds the other man. He offers consolation the only way he knows, murmuring soft nothings, while Minho cries into his neck. Cries for his stillborn child.

The smell of freshly brewed coffee is the only thing keeping Minho awake and at his senses. He sits at the kitchen table, cradling the mug between his palms as he keeps staring into the black liquid. Kibum is standing only a few steps away from him, leaning against the kitchen counter as he sips from his own large mug. It would be an enjoyable, peaceful morning if it wasn’t for the fact that Minho’s head still feels like splitting open from the amount of crying.

Kibum clears his throat, nodding towards the bottle of painkillers he set next to Minho’s coffee. “Take one. It will make you feel better.” His voice is almost unbearably gentle and it’s the only reason why Minho obeys, twisting the cap open to drop one of the white pills in his palm. What he really wants to do is stand up and pull Kibum close, draw energy straight from the other man and his presence, but something holds him back.

He feels like he’s already taken so much, without ever giving enough in turn. He doesn’t dare ask for anything more.

“We can’t go on,” Minho says and startles himself with the roughly spoken words. “Not anymore,” he adds softer, apologies written in his eyes as he looks up.

Kibum doesn’t seem to be surprised though, he simply offers a soft smile. “I know.” It feels resigned, as if he’s already accepted the fact and now only stating the obvious. Minho doesn’t know how he’s supposed to feel about that, but it’s not like he could feel anything through the thick blanket of emptiness he’s wrapped into right now.

“I need to make things right,” Minho says, more to himself than to anyone else. If it wasn’t for Jungwoo he wouldn’t even hesitate picking Kibum over his marriage, and he’s fairly certain his wife wouldn’t object to that. But there’s no way he can do that to his son, break the home they’ve so carefully tried to maintain or even worse, abandon his only child like he doesn’t even care.

For once, he needs to do what’s right. He needs to think about his son first.

Kibum seems to understand that. It’s funny how that sends a spike of fresh hurt through Minho’s heart, to finally know that everything between them is real, has always been real. If he had known that five years ago… things might be a lot different now. It’s too late for that now, too late for him to choose as the decision has been made for him.

Out of the two persons in this world he loves, he has to pick the one who needs him more.

They don’t talk more as they finish their drinks slowly. The morning sun is seeping in through the jalousies, casting indefinite patterns on every surface. It seems like the perfect moment to turn another page.

At the door, Minho pulls Kibum into one last warm embrace. They kiss, and once it breaks naturally Minho still keeps their faces close, their foreheads touching. “I love you.” The words are merely whispered, barely audible, but he’s never meant anything as much as he means them. It’s the first time he’s said it out loud during these almost seven years they’ve spent clinging on to one another.

It’s also going to be the last time. Kibum doesn’t answer but it’s all there in the way he smiles through his tears, his eyes glistening with them as he refuses to break down. Instead he grabs the lapels of Minho’s jacket and pulls him close.

Minho tastes salt in the last kiss they share. Minutes later the door falls shut behind him, locking them in two separate worlds.

It’s on Jungwoo’s birthday that Minho realizes he hasn’t seen Kibum in over a year. The little boy has stopped asking after his favourite uncle, and for that Minho is grateful. It’s not like he doesn’t already think about Kibum enough as it is.

His wife doesn’t talk to him even as much as she used to, and they no longer sleep in the same room at all. Minho has made the guestroom his own permanently, even if it still doesn’t feel like home. He spends most of his nights blinking up into the blank ceiling, surrounded by nothing but eerie silence.

At least there’s still work. It proves to be a valuable distraction, even if not as enjoyable as the time spent together with Jungwoo. Maybe Minho can once find a balance to his life. He can only hope.

---
(1915 words)

subscribe | masterlist | request | random | tumblr? ;3

as I said, very emotional for me to write, and I dunno if it comes across properly but I HOPE

now, one more chapter to go! will post it on the weekend :)

also I prettified the masterlist today :D

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I had to take a moment before I can gather enough will to type a proper comment..

I had it in me to bawl but I didn't. I wish I did though cos after one sob, I'd be ok and yeah. But now, I'm stuck. Minho made the right decision and I admire him for that. There are things that won't just go the way we would have wanted it to. In this case, it was Kibum & Minho.

For the very first time, I am not being selfish and chanting for a happy Minkey together at the end. I am willing to accept however this one's gonna end up. Somehow for me, it's enough to know that everything that had occurred between them was real. And that they cherish more than anything else in the world. That makes it more than enough of a happy ending tbh.

So yeah. One last chapter.

XD

Awh, you have no idea how relieved I am that the emotion got across properly, since it was supposed to be very emotional :3 And you're right, things just aren't so simple that they could be solved with the snap of our fingers. There are things that need to be done.

I'm so glad you've enjoyed the fic thus far! And we shall see how it will end, one more chapter for us to go :) I'm kind of reluctant to let go of this though, haha, but it has to end once too!

uhm.
I got this feeling when I read this one that it's like we get a vision of the things as we're looking at them through a glass... I don't know if it makes sense but it's confused and clear at the same time.
Minho's marriage is shit and he's saying goodbye to one of the two things that were keeping him sane? I don't get it...
Wouldn't it be simplier if he just divorced but still do the best he could to raise his child? And what about the other baby, did the mother lose her?
If just Minho could go back to seven years ago and get his shit straight aish.
As always, very well written, you're one of my favourite writers <3

it does make sense, I get that feeling sometimes too when reading fic :D and well, Minho is doing what he thinks is right. it's easy for us to see other options but he's now pretty much dead set on being a good dad after losing the other baby. and if he wants a divorce, who knows if he'd even get to keep the kid. he's just not thinking very straight. lmao like he hasn't been thinking straight at all through the course of this XD

thank you! ♥ I'm really happy to hear that! :D I hope you'll like the last chappie too~~

key fight for your man ;___;

fight for him, ;____; omg, no...

i am so sad tbh ;___;

awww /hugs don't be sad yet it's not yet over!

Wow, that was just so...heartbreaking and wrenching and ohmygah, it hurts so good ;__;

I admire Minho for choosing the way he did. He's right, even if he does love Kibum, his son and family needs him more.

and confrontation scenes hurt so much. The way Kibum was all nonchalant and accepting was so painful. He's been living his life knowing that Minho can't be his.
and their last kiss. the saltiness of Kibum's tears, ack. He's been so strong throughout this whole thing that seeing him cry here is really heartbreaking /dead

A YEAR?! huuh. I hope Kibum is doing all right.

I can't believe this is one chapter from being over. I don't have a right to say this because you wrote it but I feel like this is my baby <3333

I AM SO GLAD I mean... that might sound bad but I wanted this to be heartbreaking so badly and now I feel accomplished 8D

it's a stupid situation all in all, but Minho doesn't see any other option now :( and in a way I do agree. he's been just... pushing and pulling and unable to make a decision for so long, he is finally trying to do something.

poor Kibummie ;--; my heart breaks for him. AND I SHOULD BE ALL CALM SINCE I WROTE THIS GDI

we shall see him in the last part so just wait ;)

I can't believe either! I am going to be sad to see it go :( this is a story I've invested so much emotionally, even if that might sound odd. aw and hey it can be our baby ;3

heck yeah you should feel accomplished.

AND THE MOST HEARTBREAKING STORY AWARD GOES TO......

lmao. TITS ARE NOT CALM. WE CANNOT KEEP CALM IN THIS KIND OF SITUATION!(#I%(#@(*%

Our baby is so grown up ;__;

oh thank you thank you /bows everyone can have autographs later~

I was thinking of posting the last chapter now but it feels so ...I dun wanna let goooo ;--;

so grown up ;__; almost an adult already ;__;

i hope you know that you owe me a picture with that autograph <3

OUR BABY IS AN ADULT NOW! I CAN'T DEAL /hyperventilates

oh my.... i didn't expect his child to be stillborn.... that's really freakin sad.
what am i saying?
this whole chapter is sad.
i can't say that i was expecting him to stay with kibum.
i've always had a feeling that he would leave him, but his wife not talking to him too?

....all this is just so messed up.

this chapter was so sad to write, too :( it got me very emotional, and I was hoping it got across!

yeah it's all messed up. minho and his wife didn't begin their marriage in the best of ways and then just somehow drifted apart even further. so now it's all going wrong. we shall see how it'll end :)

I'll try to post the last part during the weekend :D so until then! ♥

really sad and heartbreaking...
since the first, they began their relationship, i know it wouldn't going well but i'm still sad with minho's decision... x_x
poor both of them, because they fall in love in wrong situation...
is it going end with a happy ending? x(

I wish I could tell you how it'll end but I won't! you will have to wait and see :D but I'll try to post the last chapter during the weekend so not long anymore~ I hope that you'll like it :3

whatever the ending, sad or happy, I'm still love this story... :)
i'll wait 4 d update patiently...

“I love you.” The words are merely whispered, barely audible, but he’s never meant anything as much as he means them. - you tore my heart right after 'i love you.' i had to close my eyes and give in to the sadness. i'm even still crying now as i write this.

what can i say? Minho should have made that decision long ago. for reasons i can't understand (maybe i'm dense), he let it drag on. actually, they both let it drag on. i guess that's how love is.

i hope Kibum did well, or moved on well, after the break up.

thanks for making me cry. somehow, it's rejuvenating. though i still feel like my heart is a heavy block of iron.

/offers tissues/ aw don't cry! although, I do take the tears as a huge compliment since I was hoping so much that this'd be as emotional to read as it was to write! so I feel accomplished, haha.

yes, the decision should've been made long ago. and you're not dense, but minho is just human. sometimes, it's incredibly hard to let go, even if you rationally know it is the only proper thing to do. and they both wanted each other, so badly.

thank you for your wonderful comment!♥

i'll keep my faith, there;s still one last chapter. i'll keep the faith.

I'll try to post the last chapter during the weekend so you shall find out the rest soon! :D

uhm.. A YEAR?!!!!! what the hell happened to kibum? TT____TT

and yeah. its sad that you realized it 5 years after.. blegh..
><"

we shall see kibummie again in the last chapter :) no worries~ this just focused more on minho's side, for now! we'll see what happens eventually ;D

And now I feel so bad for Minho too. He was so freakin' happy about having another child. Minho may be married, but it doesn't mean anything. Now, he needs to take care of his son.

Btw, the love scene was so beautiful.

Thanks for sharing :)

I'm really glad you're enjoying this! :D And yes, poor Minho. It's not easy on either one of them. :(

I found this tremendously sad, as most of these types of stories tend to be. So much time wasted where no one is really happy, just getting by. So many "what ifs" can be said during this.

And I don't really see this as cheating in the traditional sense since neither was in a "real" relationship. Key's was a job/paid companion, while Minho's was an arranged marriage that neither really was truly happy or in love so...

Well, written and full of angsty emotions. :(

A very good read (read it all in one shot so that helped from getting all upset about waiting to find out what happened next.) is that cheating?

Stories like this make me so sad too. I don't even know why I had to write one, since I'm not usually one for sad things and rather write fluff, haha. You're right, too :) It can't exactly be easily categorized as cheating, since the whole situation is so complex.

haha and no, not cheating. Glad to hear you enjoyed it! :D Thank you for reading!

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[fic] Minho/Key – SHINee – Resurgence – Chapter 7/8

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