[fic] Minho/Key – SHINee – Never Say Goodbye – Chapter 5/7

[rabenhorst]

Title: Never Say Goodbye
Author: fonulyn
Rating: NC17 (overall)
Warnings: mentions of violence (nothing very graphic) and prostitution. also I quite possibly made up half of the stuff when it comes to the police force so some factual inaccuracy.
Pairing: Minho/Key (plus ninjaing!Qmi)
Characters: Minho, Key, Ryeowook, Jonghyun, Kyuhyun, Sungmin, Onew, Donghae, Heechul
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: It's been over two years since Minho lost Kibum, lost him without knowing why. He never expected to see him again. He definitely never expected to see him again like this. (aka Minho is a policeman and his job brings him much closer to his past than he ever thought possible.)
Comments: haha after some comments on the last part demanded a speedy update I figured I could throw in a new chapter already. hopefully it’s what you wanted ;) now we get a bit more insight on how Kibum sees things, on how his life is!




Previously: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

If there’s one thing Kibum enjoys, it’s the nights he gets to go to the club with Ryeowook to listen to him sing. Sometimes, they team up for the performance, but Kibum isn’t that much of a singer and he prefers to leave it for Ryeowook who has both, talent and experience. Ryeowook keeps telling him he’d just need a little practice, but Kibum has never planned on staying here for good so he keeps declining.

The mood is nothing short of magical as Kibum lingers beside the small stage, watching how Ryeowook focuses on starting another song. Ryeowook’s eyes are closed and he’s swaying lightly, following the melody to join the piano with his voice. When he does, it makes the whole audience stop for a second, before they get back to whatever they were doing.

It might be a little silly but Kibum can’t help but feel pride of his friend. He wasn’t even supposed to make friends within the gang. Useful contacts, yes, as much as humanly possible, but no friends. Ryeowook is the only exception in the rule he has allowed himself.

While Ryeowook performs Kibum is allowed to have some time for himself. Ever since that night at the alley, weeks ago now, most of his time has been spent thinking about Minho. It’s like seeing him again triggered something and he can’t get him out of his mind, to the point of distraction.

He was already doing so well, too.

It’s not easy to throw your whole life aside and pretend to be someone you’re not, especially in a mission like this. What made it even harder for him was that he needed months to adjust, to get used to the ever present ache in his chest. Then, nights like this helped.

After the show they head back and Kibum gets ready for an early night. Jinki, his contact who is in a critical part in the same organization, has told him to lay low for a while not to rise any suspicions and thus he has nothing planned, except catching up on sleep. He’s not all that certain he can find the rest he needs, not with the way his mind is running, but he has to try.

He is already in bed when there’s a soft knock at his door. His heartbeat picks up and he wonders if it’s Minho – who he’s seeing dangerously often as it is – or if it’s maybe Jinki to discuss the next step they’ll take. Silently he slips out of bed and crosses the floor, hoping that the door won’t creak too much when he opens it an inch.

“Hey.” He is instantly greeted by a smile, and Ryeowook raises the bottle he has with him. “You looked a little down so I figured you could use some company?”

Kibum doesn’t even hesitate before opening the door wider, gesturing for the other man to come inside. “You and your bottle are always welcome.” He bows theatrically, both of them grinning as Kibum closes the door.





The empty bottle of booze is discarded to the floor as soon as they’re done with it, and soon after the two of them end up under the covers. It’s somehow comforting, to share a bed with someone who doesn’t expect anything of it, except for chatting and sleeping. Ryeowook makes them both laugh explaining about an encounter at the club, when someone figured that he was easy to hit on and take home. Neither of them has ever heard such lame pick-up lines.

The laughter dies down to low chuckles, and they stay silent, staring at the ceiling. Ryeowook shifts, turning on his side to look down at Kibum. “Hey, Key,” he begins slowly. “Remember that time at the club when that tall guy came bothering you?”

Instantly Kibum is slightly wary. “Yes..?”

“It’s just that,” Ryeowook says. He hesitates, then sighs a bit before smiling again. “I’ve seen him around here recently. Many times. And I wanted to ask if he’s… is he bothering you?”

Relief washes over Kibum so strongly he can’t help but laugh, the consumed alcohol making his head feel a little cotton-y and pleasantly hazy. “No. Thanks Wook, but it’s no problem at all.” The smile he gives his friend is honest, even if the words that follow couldn’t be further away from the truth. “He’s just another customer.”

“He seemed to recognize you from somewhere, though?” Ryeowook purses his lips thoughtfully. He flips his hair out of his eyes, huffing as he has to tuck a strand behind his ear to keep it there.

“No,” Kibum says. “He was mistaken. He thought I was someone else.”

“Oh.” Ryeowook nods. He sinks back on the bed again, shuffles under the covers until he’s comfortable right there next to Kibum. They’re so close they’re sharing body warmth, just an inch away from actually cuddling. It’s so relaxing Kibum is already drifting off when Ryeowook speaks up again. “Just, if he is bothering you, or starts bothering you, you have to tell me. We’ll sort it out.”

This is exactly why Kibum couldn’t resist forming this friendship. He was completely sold the first night in when Ryeowook came into his room asking him if he needed help with anything. From then on, he’s been one of the few things that have helped Kibum stay sane during the long months spent undercover.

Kibum smiles. “Thank you.”





There is truth to Ryeowook’s words though: Minho visits the premises almost daily, to the point of already getting noticed. Which is why Kibum brings it up once, in his ever-tactful way. “Minho you’ve got to stop running here every day like a dog in heat. People are starting to notice.”

“So what?” Minho looks up from the notebook in his hands, obviously not concerned. He is slouching in the single chair in Kibum’s room, in the exact same spot he claimed already over an hour ago when he suddenly appeared on one of his daily visits. Kibum had been in the shower when he arrived, but the doorman already knows Minho so well he lets him in anyway.

Which, if one asks Kibum, already shows how severe the problem is. Anger bubbles up instantly at Minho’s nonchalance, and with three long steps Kibum is standing in front of him to snatch the notepad away. “Would you please focus on this? Do you have any idea how much work has been put into this whole operation? You can’t just waltz in and destroy everything.”

“Relax,” Minho says. He tries to reach for the notepad again but it’s being held out of his reach so he gives in with a deep sigh. “C’mon. I’m sure I’m not the only regular you have. There must be some who come back for more.”

“Yes!” Kibum raises his voice but then quickly hushes again, aware of where they are. “Yes, there are. But no one comes back almost every single day. No one can be that horny.”

“I can.” The words are still so infuriatingly casual Kibum wants to hit something. Minho doesn’t seem to mind though and instead quickly uses the moment to grab the booklet back. He scribbles something further into it, to accompany his notes from before. “Look, I’ve managed to get acquainted with quite a few guys on the sales-side. It has to be an advantage, right?”

“What about when they realize you come back to buy drugs and to fuck your favourite whore every day, but that you never actually seem to be under the influence? In any way.” Kibum huffs. Minho grabs his wrist to pull him closer but he bats him away, irritated. “They’ll sniff out that it’s a trap. Or, even worse, they’ll think you’re buying from them to sell it forward and that’d make you competition.”

Finally Minho wins their impromptu tug-o-war and manages to get a proper hold of Kibum to yank him closer. It ends up in Kibum sitting sideways on his lap, looking like he’s ready to claw someone’s eyes out right now. Probably Minho’s. “Are you saying I need to start using the stuff I buy?” He asks, although he knows very well that’s not the point.

Kibum gives him the stare. “You are infuriating.” He struggles to get up again, but gives in after the second time he’s pulled back. “No, I’m saying you need to stop coming here so often. Look, I survived two years alone I can survive two days every now and then, okay?”

It’s like nothing has changed between them, and yet everything has. All their interaction, all the dramatic arguing, all of it is like a front for the pretended normalcy they both cling on to helplessly. They know there are explosives right below the surface. One can’t just wipe away two years worth of scars within a heartbeat. Yet right now, it’s the only thing that keeps them rooted, the only way they know how to act.

Somewhere deep inside Kibum keeps hoping that this is what they’ll once get back to. If they get through this, if they ever get their lives back, he’s determined to fight for this. As long as Minho lets him.

There is no answer to the question though and Kibum groans, finally forcing himself free so he can get upright. He grabs Minho’s arm then, pulling him up from the chair. “Now scram, I’ve got a… an appointment.” It’s code for a customer and they both know it, but Kibum still refuses to say it out loud. Instead he looks up at Minho, stubbornly pointing him at the door.

Minho lets out a breath so soft it’s barely audible. “Do you really need to?” He steps closer until he’s crowding Kibum’s personal space and reaches out to tug a strand of hair off his face. He lets his fingertips linger on Kibum’s cheek, follows the trail of his touch with his gaze. “Can’t you cancel it?”

“Minho,” Kibum sighs. He presses his forehead against Minho’s neck, partly to avoid his eyes and partly because he knows Minho enjoys it, as much as he does. “I have to.”

“I’ll be back,” Minho says, decidedly. He doesn’t say when and although Kibum keeps hoping he’ll try to visit less frequently now, he knows it’s not very likely.

There is no huge drama, this time. Minho steals a quick, heartfelt kiss, before he leaves. Then the door simply falls shut with a low thud and Kibum is alone in his room. He spends a good moment staring at the wall, trying to get some order in his chaotic thoughts. A part – the selfish part – of him is glad to have Minho back in his life, but another, far bigger part wishes he would’ve stayed out of this.

On the other side of the door, Minho closes his eyes and leans against it, trying to get a hold of himself. He knows he must go, fast, since if he’ll ever come face to face with any of the customers he can’t be held liable for his actions. The mere image of another man touching what should be his… it makes him ready to snap.

Minho knows he has no right to that, though. So he takes a deep breath, holding it in as he rolls his shoulders and works the tense muscles loose. Finally he releases all air from his lungs in one go and hurries out of the building in long, urgent steps.





During the following two weeks, Minho does his best to stick to the deal. He doesn’t visit Kibum every night, once even manages to let three days pass in between his visits. He’s marginally proud of himself after that. Thus far, his frequent visits haven’t brought any disastrous consequences upon them. Quite the contrary, he feels he’s getting more into the whole circle, already known well enough to be let into the back to collect his goods.

But not to the room at the very back, the one with the luxurious divan and the paintings that each could buy a house on a beach. Still, he feels like he’s making progress, and not even Kibum’s crabby and uncooperative attitude can spoil it. He knows – or at least suspects – that Kibum is only being difficult because he forced his way into the mission. Plus, of course, a little bit just on principle.

Then there’s the fact that he suddenly has Kibum back in his life. It makes him incredibly giddy, to the point that Jonghyun starts rolling his eyes at him mockingly, always ready to quip a dirty remark or allusion whenever the situation calls for it, and more.

In a way, it feels like living a dream and Minho is deathly afraid of waking up. In his world, waking up equals the end of the mission. For now they’ve worked out their fragile truce, a way to exist together in the situation and try to get the job done. After that’s gone, Minho has no idea where they stand. Yet he doesn’t dwell on it, doesn’t think about it. For him life has always been that simple. Focus on the present.

As much as he hates the secrecy, hates what Kibum has to do for his cover, hates the operation for throwing his life upside down, it’s still a million times better than the past two years.

Every time Minho feels he can’t get through the day, he swears to himself; whatever will happen, he will not stand by and watch as he loses Kibum again.





It takes some time still before Minho gets to meet the other half of this operation, the one Kibum works with. Technically, he has met Jinki before. That was when Ryeowook brought him here for the first time, when he desperately tried to book a night with Kibum through the official route. When he still knew the man as Onew.

When Jinki steps into the room he gives Minho a disapproving glance, pointedly ignoring him as he exchanges a few whispered words with Kibum. Minho sits still on the edge of the bed, feeling like he’s being evaluated and he has no idea if he’s going to pass the test or not. He fidgets, barely noticeably though, and tries to focus on inhaling slowly.

Finally Jinki turns around, carefully taking a seat in the only chair in the room. He still looks tense, clearly disapproving, but he doesn’t say anything about that or order Minho to leave. “Listen,” Jinki says. “I haven’t spoken to anyone yet but I will let our superiors know that you’re now involved in the mission. It’s vital they know everyone that’s on our side here. You will promise me, right now, that you won’t tell any of this to anyone, not your friends, family, colleagues…”

“I swear,” Minho answers quickly. “I won’t endanger the operation.”

Jinki looks at him for a moment, his eyes clear. “You already have.”

Suddenly there’s a dip in the mattress as a weight settles down beside him, and before Minho can say anything there’s a hand resting on his forearm. Kibum’s fingers are cool, his touch soothing, but he doesn’t look at Minho as he speaks, directing his words to Jinki. “We have to work with what we’ve got. I didn’t want to include him either, but…” he trails off, pauses for a second. “He got into the backroom. He knows Shinji.”

“He what?” Jinki’s eyes widen and for the first time, he actually looks impressed. He gives Minho a disbelieving glance, before nodding, slowly. “Alright. So you’re a valued customer or what?”

“…something like that,” Minho clears his throat, uncomfortable. It’s hard to explain but he tries nevertheless. After that first time he got into the backroom, helping the man – Shinji, he later learned – carry his friend there, he somehow became one of the people trusted inside. He isn’t even certain why, but he suspects it has something to do with the fact that he was seen inside with the boss, and now everyone assumes he’s got clearance.

It sounds stupid. It is stupid. But it’s a chance they can’t afford to let slip by.

Jinki is silent for a good while after, processing all the new information. “So,” he says finally, “it could be a trap. Maybe they already are onto us and you’ll be the first one to suffer. But.” He sighs. “It’s the best shot we’ve got right now. We’ve been at this for so long and everything we did backfired.” He doesn’t elaborate further and Minho doesn’t ask.

“Before this operation,” Kibum explains as he pointedly avoids Minho’s eyes. ‘The SF has been trying to get the drugs trafficking under control for years. They were getting pretty damn desperate. So, we’re kind of their last choice.” He chews on his lower lip and instinctively Minho places an arm around his shoulders. Surprisingly enough, Kibum doesn’t resist and instead lets himself be pulled against Minho’s side.

Obviously Jinki doesn’t mind, as he pays them no attention. “Alright, we’ll work from here. But from now on you’re both under my command. I say jump, you ask how high.”

Minho only nods.

---
(2869 words)



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so yaay we get progress! \o/

I’m craving strawberries so bad but we have none this is torture D: