rabenhorst (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rabenhorst) wrote2010-09-15 03:28 pm
rabenhorst) wrote2010-09-15 03:28 pm
(no subject)
Title: Fifteen Years: Part I – Of Beginnings
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fonulyn
Rating: PG13
Pairing: Toshiya/Die (eventually), some Miyavi/Die, significant appearances by Kaoru and Kyo
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Your life is formed by countless encounters and people who mean a lot to you, in one way or another. Sometimes all you can do is hope that all those encounters finally lead you to the point you always wanted to get to. And maybe you can enjoy the road there, on the way.
Comments:
fonulyn: This I wrote as a birthday present to my dear seinen_no ♥ :) It does have a kind of a melancholy tone to it but it’s not angsty, and if you ask me it is actually a happy fic eventually. I don’t know what to say about it *laughs* I really don’t. Except that I hope you’ll give it a try and will like it! I missed writing Kaoru and Kyo, too, so they will have their appearances in the fic although they aren’t included in the pairings.
And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive.
Fifteen Years: Part I – Of Beginnings
Die had never thought he would get much anywhere with this band business. He had hoped, of course, he had dreamed big and wished he’d turn out to be one of the celebrated music heroes but somehow it had always seemed such a far away thought he could never grasp it. All the bands he joined were more or less crappy, although in different ways. There was one that simply sounded shit and when he tried to bring his own compositions into the mix they got thrown away as they didn’t “fit the band’s style” as the vocalist had told him. There had been a band where all the other members had been considerably older than he was, being barely over twenty, and when the drummer had made clear he would have to give him certain sexual favours to stay in the band he had left without looking back, slamming the door shut behind him.
There had even been a couple of good bands, promising ones, but no one else in the band willing to work for the success and waiting for it to come without any effort put into it. All in all, it didn’t look that promising and Die had already been half-resigned to his fate, thinking that maybe his parents had been right when they had gently told him that going to school might be a better option. He had the brains for it, he would’ve succeeded with that, but when it came to music it wasn’t up to himself but he needed the full co-operation of everyone else that formed the whole entity of a band.
When he finally ended up in LaSadie’s, he knew that there was something different. There was talent, there was still much to develop, but there also was this certain determination amongst the members that made him feel like they could do anything. Together they would either stand or fall, and they could do it. With a lot of work and effort and sacrifices, but he was willing to do that, he had never been afraid of giving all of himself to a cause he believed in.
Even more than ten years later, when someone would ask Die what made it all possible, he would correct the person. Not “what” made it all possible but “who”. He believed strongly that the whole band was needed in the process, that no one of them was anything without the others. They couldn’t just launch a single-career and assume it’d be a success, they needed every single one of the whole bunch to make it big. But there was someone who was, in Die’s opinion, the strongest factor of it all. And it was Kaoru. If it hadn’t been for Kaoru’s sharp business sense and his merciless drive to achieve what they all wanted, they had probably strayed from their path at some point, and although the older guitarist was far from being a dictator he made sure to keep the whole bunch in check.
And that was why they had made it big. Die remembered countless nights they had spent in that shithole someone might call a studio, lying there close to each other to gain at least some warmth with the windows and doors broken and no one having the time nor the money to fix them. He remembered it clear as day, how he and Kaoru had been lying there, staring into the ceiling and coming up with ideas for songs, sharing all the new thoughts that had popped into their minds. With time it got more personal even and they were talking about their dreams, their hopes and how they thought everything would work out. Although they didn’t talk about it then, they both knew that there was something missing, though. Something missing from this puzzle called a band. But they were both confident that they would figure it out sooner or later.
The first step into the right direction happened when they were having what they called a tour. In reality it was six gigs in the crappy bars nearby and it was a tour only because they had to sleep in cheap motels and stay away from home for the nights. They wouldn’t probably even gain anything, seeing that they paid more of the motel than they earned from the gig, but it was the experience that counted if one asked anyone of them. They all wanted this, and they knew the road would be rocky.
During the concert the audience had been throwing everything possible at them, on stage, and Die had even managed to lose one of his contact lenses, playing half-blind for the rest of the show. Now that they were back at the motel, he carefully stored away the single lens, knowing he would need to survive with it for the following few weeks and the following gigs, before he would have the needed money to replace it. He sat cross legged on the bed, putting on his glasses when Kaoru stepped out from the bathroom, after taking a cold shower as they didn’t get any warm water into their room.
They had only gotten a double-bed too, despite having asked for separate ones. Not that they minded that much, they had slept in the same bed earlier, too, and it was no problem for either of them. It might’ve been a slight problem for Die since he had realized already earlier that he was harbouring a slight crush towards the other man, and being close to him was always a test for his self control. Yet he valued the lead guitarist much more as a friend and a bandmate, knowing he’d never do anything to jeopardize that. He wasn’t crushing that bad. Which didn’t mean that in the darkness of the night he wouldn’t have some indecent thoughts when he was drunk and tired enough, though…
Right now he wasn’t thinking of any of it really, just smiled at Kaoru as the older man plopped down on the bed right next to him, rubbing furiously on his wet hair to dry it even a bit, leaving purple and blue streaks on the white hotel towel. Distantly Die wondered if they would have to pay for that, too, but he decided not to care. He had managed to color his own towel pink with his red hair anyway. “You know,” Kaoru started, finally dropping the towel on his lap as he looked up at the taller man seriously. “We aren’t going anywhere as long as he keeps us on a short leash.”
He didn’t even need to specify who he was talking about, they both knew he was referring to the bassist of the group. It wasn’t that they didn’t like him, or didn’t get along with him. They simply had different goals and different approaches to it all. And they were all unconditional and stubborn enough not to compromise. “Yeah,” Die sighed, nodding a little to show he understood. “I know. Kyo is getting pretty pissed, too. He would want us to sign up for that deal we got offered. And honestly? I’m pretty partial towards it, too.”
The thoughtful nod Kaoru gave showed him that he thought the same. “Let’s talk about it tomorrow with Shinya, okay? And then, after we’re done with these gigs… we’ll do something about it.”
Kaoru got up already, grabbing his towels and his clothes so he could get dressed and throw the towels back into the bathroom. Just before he stepped out of the room he turned towards Die, though, smiling at him genuinely. “And we’ll take the deal.”
“You know Die, I think I have a solution to our problem!” Kaoru announced, giggling right afterwards as he felt quite bubbly, the champagne going straight into his head apparently. And no wonder, seeing how he was lying on Die’s bed – or mattress – with his legs up in the air and his head dangling down against the floor. All the blood had probably packed into his head anyway, bringing the alcohol with it effectively. At least it seemed to amuse Kaoru to no end and he kept on grinning merrily, toying with some long purple strands of hair that were pooling on the floor around him.
The sight amused Die to no end as well, and he couldn’t help but to laugh as he took a long sip straight from the bottle. It wasn’t particularly good champagne. It was a cheap brand and they had only gotten it because they hadn’t managed to agree on anything else. It did get you drunk, though, pretty effectively as proven. “To which problem?” Die asked curiously, grinning as he watched his friend shift on his place and begin to swing his legs in the air merrily. “To the problem why the room is spinning too fast, or did you figure out why aeroplanes don’t need to flap their wings like birds do?”
Kaoru snorted and waved his hand dismissively. “I already abandoned those. I’m thinking of the big things! Important things! Life-altering things!”
“So you finally managed to come up with the meaning of life? Scientists will be impressed, Kao.”
“Shut up or I’ll throw my shoe at you.”
That threat was pretty effective, especially since Kaoru had already moved to tug his shoe off his foot and was obviously aiming the best he could in his drunken state. Die doubted if he’d ever manage to actually hit him with it, but it wasn’t worth the risk, now was it. “Okay, I’m listening. Tell me what you figured out, Kaoru.”
There was a happy smile dancing on Kaoru’s lips as he rolled over onto his stomach, still waving his legs in the air but a different way this time. “I know where we will get a new bassist. Kyo heard from this kid and he says he’s good! And if Kyo says he’s good, he’s good, you know. We will go check him out in a while, sometime next week they’re playing I heard. And we will kidnap him from his band and bring him to ours.” He was obviously happy with his decisions and babbled about them with this big, fat grin plastered on his lips. He reached out his small hand for the champagne, and Die was so stunned that he handed the bottle over without protests.
“You know a new bassist for us? But that’s amazing!” Die burst out finally, the grin that spread on his lips matching Kaoru’s in width. Or maybe it was a bit wider seeing that his mouth was bigger, Die’s drunken mind managed to process that bit of information too. Giggling, he snatched the bottle of champagne back from Kaoru, only to notice that it was empty. Now frowning, he looked at the other man. “Are you sure he’s good enough?”
“No,” Kaoru smirked, “didn’t see him play yet. But he could be! And he could be exactly what we need to get this baby running and to shoot for the stars!” He laughed and Die joined in, deciding that what the hell. It was worth a try. Maybe Kaoru was right and they would find the missing piece of the puzzle finally.
To celebrate, they opened another bottle of champagne.
It took them longer before they managed to actually meet up with the new bassist in question. Kyo and Kaoru had gone to see him perform and they were both red hot for the idea of having him as the last addition to the group. Die and Shinya were more sceptical but then again, they trusted their friends and knew that they didn’t get enthusiastic over nothing. So they had decided that this Toshiya, as the kid called himself, would join their practice once and they would see if they’d hit it off or not. Kaoru confessed to Die he was begging they would, since the kid was good, and even if they didn’t like him as a person all too much they could use a talented bassist like him.
They didn’t need to wait that long to find out if they would like the new addition or not. All it took was him stepping into the room, smiling at the whole bunch with his crooked teeth, a genuine sparkle in his eyes. “Hi everybody! I’m Toshiya!” He greeted them informally, the slight nervousness visible although he tried to hide it with his smile and the pretended casualness. Die was standing right next to him and the smile was soon directed at him, along with a friendly western-style handshake. “Nice to meet you.”
And that was when Die fell in love.
Author:
fonulynRating: PG13
Pairing: Toshiya/Die (eventually), some Miyavi/Die, significant appearances by Kaoru and Kyo
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: Your life is formed by countless encounters and people who mean a lot to you, in one way or another. Sometimes all you can do is hope that all those encounters finally lead you to the point you always wanted to get to. And maybe you can enjoy the road there, on the way.
Comments:
fonulyn: This I wrote as a birthday present to my dear seinen_no ♥ :) It does have a kind of a melancholy tone to it but it’s not angsty, and if you ask me it is actually a happy fic eventually. I don’t know what to say about it *laughs* I really don’t. Except that I hope you’ll give it a try and will like it! I missed writing Kaoru and Kyo, too, so they will have their appearances in the fic although they aren’t included in the pairings. And feel free to add our journal if you like the stories!
Plus, the archive.
Die had never thought he would get much anywhere with this band business. He had hoped, of course, he had dreamed big and wished he’d turn out to be one of the celebrated music heroes but somehow it had always seemed such a far away thought he could never grasp it. All the bands he joined were more or less crappy, although in different ways. There was one that simply sounded shit and when he tried to bring his own compositions into the mix they got thrown away as they didn’t “fit the band’s style” as the vocalist had told him. There had been a band where all the other members had been considerably older than he was, being barely over twenty, and when the drummer had made clear he would have to give him certain sexual favours to stay in the band he had left without looking back, slamming the door shut behind him.
There had even been a couple of good bands, promising ones, but no one else in the band willing to work for the success and waiting for it to come without any effort put into it. All in all, it didn’t look that promising and Die had already been half-resigned to his fate, thinking that maybe his parents had been right when they had gently told him that going to school might be a better option. He had the brains for it, he would’ve succeeded with that, but when it came to music it wasn’t up to himself but he needed the full co-operation of everyone else that formed the whole entity of a band.
When he finally ended up in LaSadie’s, he knew that there was something different. There was talent, there was still much to develop, but there also was this certain determination amongst the members that made him feel like they could do anything. Together they would either stand or fall, and they could do it. With a lot of work and effort and sacrifices, but he was willing to do that, he had never been afraid of giving all of himself to a cause he believed in.
Even more than ten years later, when someone would ask Die what made it all possible, he would correct the person. Not “what” made it all possible but “who”. He believed strongly that the whole band was needed in the process, that no one of them was anything without the others. They couldn’t just launch a single-career and assume it’d be a success, they needed every single one of the whole bunch to make it big. But there was someone who was, in Die’s opinion, the strongest factor of it all. And it was Kaoru. If it hadn’t been for Kaoru’s sharp business sense and his merciless drive to achieve what they all wanted, they had probably strayed from their path at some point, and although the older guitarist was far from being a dictator he made sure to keep the whole bunch in check.
And that was why they had made it big. Die remembered countless nights they had spent in that shithole someone might call a studio, lying there close to each other to gain at least some warmth with the windows and doors broken and no one having the time nor the money to fix them. He remembered it clear as day, how he and Kaoru had been lying there, staring into the ceiling and coming up with ideas for songs, sharing all the new thoughts that had popped into their minds. With time it got more personal even and they were talking about their dreams, their hopes and how they thought everything would work out. Although they didn’t talk about it then, they both knew that there was something missing, though. Something missing from this puzzle called a band. But they were both confident that they would figure it out sooner or later.
The first step into the right direction happened when they were having what they called a tour. In reality it was six gigs in the crappy bars nearby and it was a tour only because they had to sleep in cheap motels and stay away from home for the nights. They wouldn’t probably even gain anything, seeing that they paid more of the motel than they earned from the gig, but it was the experience that counted if one asked anyone of them. They all wanted this, and they knew the road would be rocky.
During the concert the audience had been throwing everything possible at them, on stage, and Die had even managed to lose one of his contact lenses, playing half-blind for the rest of the show. Now that they were back at the motel, he carefully stored away the single lens, knowing he would need to survive with it for the following few weeks and the following gigs, before he would have the needed money to replace it. He sat cross legged on the bed, putting on his glasses when Kaoru stepped out from the bathroom, after taking a cold shower as they didn’t get any warm water into their room.
They had only gotten a double-bed too, despite having asked for separate ones. Not that they minded that much, they had slept in the same bed earlier, too, and it was no problem for either of them. It might’ve been a slight problem for Die since he had realized already earlier that he was harbouring a slight crush towards the other man, and being close to him was always a test for his self control. Yet he valued the lead guitarist much more as a friend and a bandmate, knowing he’d never do anything to jeopardize that. He wasn’t crushing that bad. Which didn’t mean that in the darkness of the night he wouldn’t have some indecent thoughts when he was drunk and tired enough, though…
Right now he wasn’t thinking of any of it really, just smiled at Kaoru as the older man plopped down on the bed right next to him, rubbing furiously on his wet hair to dry it even a bit, leaving purple and blue streaks on the white hotel towel. Distantly Die wondered if they would have to pay for that, too, but he decided not to care. He had managed to color his own towel pink with his red hair anyway. “You know,” Kaoru started, finally dropping the towel on his lap as he looked up at the taller man seriously. “We aren’t going anywhere as long as he keeps us on a short leash.”
He didn’t even need to specify who he was talking about, they both knew he was referring to the bassist of the group. It wasn’t that they didn’t like him, or didn’t get along with him. They simply had different goals and different approaches to it all. And they were all unconditional and stubborn enough not to compromise. “Yeah,” Die sighed, nodding a little to show he understood. “I know. Kyo is getting pretty pissed, too. He would want us to sign up for that deal we got offered. And honestly? I’m pretty partial towards it, too.”
The thoughtful nod Kaoru gave showed him that he thought the same. “Let’s talk about it tomorrow with Shinya, okay? And then, after we’re done with these gigs… we’ll do something about it.”
Kaoru got up already, grabbing his towels and his clothes so he could get dressed and throw the towels back into the bathroom. Just before he stepped out of the room he turned towards Die, though, smiling at him genuinely. “And we’ll take the deal.”
“You know Die, I think I have a solution to our problem!” Kaoru announced, giggling right afterwards as he felt quite bubbly, the champagne going straight into his head apparently. And no wonder, seeing how he was lying on Die’s bed – or mattress – with his legs up in the air and his head dangling down against the floor. All the blood had probably packed into his head anyway, bringing the alcohol with it effectively. At least it seemed to amuse Kaoru to no end and he kept on grinning merrily, toying with some long purple strands of hair that were pooling on the floor around him.
The sight amused Die to no end as well, and he couldn’t help but to laugh as he took a long sip straight from the bottle. It wasn’t particularly good champagne. It was a cheap brand and they had only gotten it because they hadn’t managed to agree on anything else. It did get you drunk, though, pretty effectively as proven. “To which problem?” Die asked curiously, grinning as he watched his friend shift on his place and begin to swing his legs in the air merrily. “To the problem why the room is spinning too fast, or did you figure out why aeroplanes don’t need to flap their wings like birds do?”
Kaoru snorted and waved his hand dismissively. “I already abandoned those. I’m thinking of the big things! Important things! Life-altering things!”
“So you finally managed to come up with the meaning of life? Scientists will be impressed, Kao.”
“Shut up or I’ll throw my shoe at you.”
That threat was pretty effective, especially since Kaoru had already moved to tug his shoe off his foot and was obviously aiming the best he could in his drunken state. Die doubted if he’d ever manage to actually hit him with it, but it wasn’t worth the risk, now was it. “Okay, I’m listening. Tell me what you figured out, Kaoru.”
There was a happy smile dancing on Kaoru’s lips as he rolled over onto his stomach, still waving his legs in the air but a different way this time. “I know where we will get a new bassist. Kyo heard from this kid and he says he’s good! And if Kyo says he’s good, he’s good, you know. We will go check him out in a while, sometime next week they’re playing I heard. And we will kidnap him from his band and bring him to ours.” He was obviously happy with his decisions and babbled about them with this big, fat grin plastered on his lips. He reached out his small hand for the champagne, and Die was so stunned that he handed the bottle over without protests.
“You know a new bassist for us? But that’s amazing!” Die burst out finally, the grin that spread on his lips matching Kaoru’s in width. Or maybe it was a bit wider seeing that his mouth was bigger, Die’s drunken mind managed to process that bit of information too. Giggling, he snatched the bottle of champagne back from Kaoru, only to notice that it was empty. Now frowning, he looked at the other man. “Are you sure he’s good enough?”
“No,” Kaoru smirked, “didn’t see him play yet. But he could be! And he could be exactly what we need to get this baby running and to shoot for the stars!” He laughed and Die joined in, deciding that what the hell. It was worth a try. Maybe Kaoru was right and they would find the missing piece of the puzzle finally.
To celebrate, they opened another bottle of champagne.
It took them longer before they managed to actually meet up with the new bassist in question. Kyo and Kaoru had gone to see him perform and they were both red hot for the idea of having him as the last addition to the group. Die and Shinya were more sceptical but then again, they trusted their friends and knew that they didn’t get enthusiastic over nothing. So they had decided that this Toshiya, as the kid called himself, would join their practice once and they would see if they’d hit it off or not. Kaoru confessed to Die he was begging they would, since the kid was good, and even if they didn’t like him as a person all too much they could use a talented bassist like him.
They didn’t need to wait that long to find out if they would like the new addition or not. All it took was him stepping into the room, smiling at the whole bunch with his crooked teeth, a genuine sparkle in his eyes. “Hi everybody! I’m Toshiya!” He greeted them informally, the slight nervousness visible although he tried to hide it with his smile and the pretended casualness. Die was standing right next to him and the smile was soon directed at him, along with a friendly western-style handshake. “Nice to meet you.”
And that was when Die fell in love.