(no subject)

[rabenhorst]

Title: The walk of life
Author: seinen_no and fonulyn
Rating: PG13 [will go up]
Pairing: Die and Kaoru
Disclaimer: We own no one, only our dirty imaginations.
Comments:
fonulyn: Okay, so now I don’t know what to say. First of all, I like this a hell lot. It is an AU fic, but don’t judge it by it^^ It really is good, trust me [and now I sound totally selfish xD]. I had so much fun writing this with seinen_no [although I always love to write with her] and it all went so quickly although it became rather long even. I just enjoyed myself too much and it made the time pass quickly. It’s not as happy as the things we’ve written thus far, although it isn’t that angsty either, I guess. Dämn, just read it!
Gods, and now this comment made no sense at all^^;

seinen_no: I guess our comments never make sense XD But as fonulyn just said, I really do like this a hell lot too. And I'm kinda proud that we managed to finally write this (we had the idea for longer) and it came out as planned. Maybe I'm so proud, because it actually was planned. I mean, usually we just have a rough sketch of the storyline and then just see what comes of it. Here, we had quite a good picture right from the beginning. And hun, I always enjoy writing with you^^ So now have fun reading and comment, please :D







The walk of life
Chapter 1: The newbie

Carrying his sheets and a single small pillow in his hands, Kaoru followed the warden along the endless corridor. Small cells were lined up to the left and to the right until they reached a stair that led to the second floor. The black-haired man was certain that he wouldn't have to stay for long, his boss' lawyers would bail him out soon and thus, he ignored the insinuating remarks of the other prisoners. If he had known that he'd be jailed for the whole 13 months of his conviction, he wouldn't have been so cool.

But at that moment, he was totally calm, taking long, determined strides and kept his head up high. Never having seen a prison from the inside, he had heard a lot of stories and thought that playing the tough right from the beginning was a clever thing to do. Besides, he knew that some other members of his clan were imprisoned there too and he was hoping for their support. In vain, as it would be proven later.

Anyhow, he had his hopes high not to stay there for long and even smiled friendly at the guard when he stopped in front of a cell. "Your new room-mate," the warden said monotonously into the dimly lit room when he had opened the door. "Just make yourself acquainted." With that, he practically pushed Kaoru inside and slammed the grid door shut.

There was a red haired man sitting on the bottom bunk in the cell, but he didn't even look up as the door slammed shut and locked. It seemed that he wasn't really doing anything either though, as he only stared into the nothingness at the moment.

He hadn't been there for long, if one compared it to some other prisoners. But to him these couple of months felt like a lifetime. He had learned not to trust people, and therefore wasn't really eager to make new friends. Or friends, to be more exact, since he didn't really have any to begin with.

Self-confidently, Kaoru slammed his belongings on the top bunk without bothering to ask if it was taken or not. He had only taken a quick glance at his redheaded cell mate, but from that could tell that he was around his age and somehow didn't fit his picture of the tattooed, muscled prisoner.

The redhead tried not to look at the newcomer, not wanting to seem interested. But he took a glance from the corner of his eyes when he thought the other wasn't looking, and found out that his cellmate was a young man much like himself, and looked determined at least. Mentally he laughed a bit, knowing that that kind of self confidence usually faded quickly here.

"So I guess the top bunk's not taken." Kaoru finally said and climbed up, instantly lying down on his back, his arms folded behind his head and stared at the ceiling.

This was pretty much his clever plan to survive. Staring holes into the air and imagine green meadows, his last night with his girlfriend and hoping that time would pass by quickly. He didn't care for his fellow prisoner as long as he left him alone. Inwardly, he had to admit though that he was a bit afraid of going to the showers. One has heard things about that and he wasn't eager to find out if those rumors were true. However, he would soon find the guys of his gang and then everything would be fine for him.

"Now it is." The man from the bunk below commented shortly, before leaning against the wall heavily, still sitting on his own bunk. For the first weeks he had tried to remember all the things from outside, but soon it had all faded and now there was only blankness in his mind usually.

Silence fell upon them and Kaoru didn't move an inch, didn't dare to close his eyes nor felt the urge to talk to the other man. He felt a certain natural need, but since the toilet bowl was attached to the wall and no cubicle, he denied himself to go there for as long as he could. The fact that he had been brought there early evening made things even more complicated, because the cells had already been locked and he couldn't seek the company of other inmates nor try to figure out how things worked at this place. At one point, he couldn't bare the pressure in his bladder any longer, jumped off his bed and released himself, always listening up if the redhead remained sitting where he was.

The other wasn't really moving from his spot, but as the newcomer came down from his bunk he instantly attached his eyes to his back. Being in the jail hadn't killed his natural curiosity yet, but he fought not to show it.

After washing his hands in the ridiculously small sink, Kaoru turned around. At first, he had intended to get right back to his bed and try to rest a bit, but then suddenly changed his mind. He had come to the conclusion that this thin guy, taller or not, was no threat for him. Setting up in front of him, he looked him straight in the eyes, trying to display fearlessness.

"I see, you're not much of a talker. But since I still have my manners, I will introduce myself. I'm Niikura Kaoru." He waited for a reply, trying to read the other's expression.

For a few seconds the redhead looked the other in the eye, dead silent. After a moment he allowed himself to nod a bit. "Andou Daisuke." Somehow he sensed no danger in the new guy, although he seemed to be tough enough to survive probably.

Kaoru didn't know a lot about psychology, but he had a good knowledge of the human nature. Enough to make him believe that this Andou-guy didn't mean any harm. In appreciation, he nodded slowly and then climbed his bunk again. In his opinion, there was nothing they could talk about right now since the other seemed to be extremely close-mouthed.

Only a second after he had taken his former position, the lights went out and delivered them to pitch black darkness. Somewhere from the other cells, they could hear noises, moans and far away a scream, something that sent ice-cold shivers down Kaoru's spine and caused him to fight sleep as best as possible.

Daisuke, Die as people called him, slipped under his blanket as the darkness landed upon them, but was still staring into nothingness. He had staid awake there for countless nights listening to the distant sounds, and nowadays he was able to be somewhat numb when it came to them. Now the new guy was mixing his thoughts though, as he couldn't help but to think how he would turn out eventually.

Kaoru hadn't bothered to undress and only covered himself with the thin blanket although he felt terribly hot. The air in the cell was muggy, various kinds of smells reaching his nose, and he would just have wanted to open a window and allow fresh air to fill the room. But there was no window, just as there wasn't a door through which he could just leave. After some time, the walls seemed to close in on him and caused his heart to race and cold sweat to rise on his forehead. Yet, he didn't move a muscle and just pretended to be sleeping. He knew though that his fellow inmate was still awake. He could tell it by the way his respiration was going.

Die was listening to the other's breathing as well. Somehow it was a bit weird to have a cellmate again, seeing that for the past couple of weeks he had been the only one living there. And he somehow just couldn't even close his eyes, too many thoughts running through his head. Even though he had gotten used to most things here, even somewhat, he still flinched at some of the sounds echoing in the darkness.

Without remembering when he had fallen asleep, Kaoru flinched and stirred awake somewhere in the middle of the night like one did after having a nightmare. His heart was beating loudly in his chest, fear racing through his veins, gripping his heart with its cold fingers. The sound he had just heard set his teeth on edge and he couldn't hold back a quiet gasp. He cursed himself for losing his temper in the first night already, going through all kinds of fears from being raped, killed to claustrophobia and the fear to suffocate in there.

During his time here, Die had developed a way to sleep without stirring awake to the sounds that eventually came every night, but now that he heard a gasp from the same cell, it immediately caused him to wake up. He staid still though, only listening if the other would fall asleep again or not. He still remembered his own first night here, and he basically knew what kind of things he was going through.

Somehow, Kaoru managed to fall asleep again, but it felt like only a minute before the lights went on and the doors opened automatically. He had no idea what he was supposed to do, but was craving a coffee and a cigarette. They had only allowed him to keep two packages and he knew that those were precious as gold and hid them under his mattress, not trusting his cell mate.

However, he felt somewhat numb and overly exhausted, the terror of the past night still lingering in his bones. So he was just waiting till somebody would tell him what to do, or till this Daisuke made a move himself.

The redhead seemed to have no hurry though, and he took his time before heading out of the cell and towards the huge bathroom. They all had to take a shower in the mornings, and although he had survived in there for relatively long already, Die still feared the every morning showers somewhere in his mind. He had learnt not to show it though, and looked totally calm while making his way there.

Trying not to seem too much like a newbie, Kaoru gave him some head start before he carefully followed after. Men of all sizes and shapes were flooding the common showers already and he gazed around, trying to find a shielded corner somewhere. Avoiding direct eye-contact, he instinctively followed the redhead, taking the shower next to him. Remarks about him being something like "fresh meat" or "unspent" made him flinch inwardly, but outwardly he tried to remain calm and undressed slowly.

Die had also developed a way to survive through this every day, mechanically repeating everything and not talking to nor looking at the others straight. This was simply a place where he wanted to interact with no one. As quickly as he could he scrubbed himself clean, intending on getting out of the shower as soon as possible.

Kaoru kept his gaze down, but still tried to perceive every unusual movement around him. Worriedly, he had noticed that none of the guards was watching this room and that simple awareness made him wash himself at lightning speed. Without bothering to dry himself thoroughly, he was dressed again within mere minutes, heading to the exit before his cellmate.

Only when he had walked out of the shower room, Die noticed that he was now following his new cellmate. Curiously he kept his eyes locked on him for a moment, trying to figure out what kind of guy he was sharing a cell with. It still was fifteen minutes till the common breakfast, so he didn't even have to hurry.

A little lost, Kaoru stopped in the corridor, looking left and right and trying to figure out what he was supposed to do next. He didn't dare to ask one of the passers by, unsure how they would react, nor were there any guards he could ask for guidance. Just then, his hackles curled and he felt a gaze upon him.

Swiftly, he turned around, ready to defend himself. Only when he recognized his cellmate, a small sound of relief left his lips and he even smiled faintly. "What is it going to be next?" he asked bluntly, dropping his voice as lowly as possible not to show any fear.

Die startled a bit as the other addressed him suddenly, even smiling. Automatically he responded to the smile, only barely noticeably though. "Breakfast. It'll be in ten minutes." He was actually glad that his new cellmate said something to him.

"And after that?" the black-haired men went on. He thought he should use the moment to gain as much information as possible and the redhead's gaze seemed to be honest at least. Besides, this was the perfect opportunity to find something out about him. Not by what he told, but by how he reacted, how he moved and how he answered his gaze.

"Work." The redhead nodded a bit at his words, still looking straight at the other. "I work in the laundry section at the moment. Then we get food around noon, and work ends at half past five." He didn't even notice he was beginning to explain more and more, not keeping his few words answers anymore.

Inwardly, Kaoru smiled. He had learned how to make people talk without giving away too much himself and his cellmate seemed to be of the talkative kind anyway. He explained everything to him without the need to ask much. He even told him which jobs were the best and why, as well as how one could get himself one of those jobs.

When they reached the dining-room together, Die had already offered him to ask if they needed somebody in the laundry still. Kaoru only nodded from time to time or dropped a subtle question, eying the redhead attentively. By the way, he mirrored the other's actions, took a tray and lined up for the food.

As they were sitting at the long table with some other people, Die fell more silent. He had no problems with explaining things to the new guy, as it gave him something to do at least. But somehow he subconsciously didn't want to attract attention, and kept more quiet when they were surrounded by other people in the dining room.

Only as they were finished, he looked up at Kaoru. "So, you want to ask for a job in the laundry?"

"Sure," the other man answered shrugging. He was convinced that the laundry could be a quiet place where one wouldn't have to watch his back all the time and somehow he trusted that seeking the redhead's company until he found his own clan members would be wisest. "You think they take me?" he asked, arching an eyebrow.

"If they don't have too many already." It was the redhead's turn to shrug. He was quite convinced that the other would get a job there though.

Together they headed for the part where the laundry was done, Die leading the way. Kaoru glanced around curiously, memorizing the way through the corridors and passages. His heart was beating a bit quicker when he realized how lonely it was there and what an easy prey he would make at that moment. However, they arrived safely at the place where the laundry was done, folded and stored.

"Say, aren't we allowed to spend some time in the yard too?" He had just remembered that some inmates had gone to the yard to have a smoke, to work out or to just enjoy the weather.

"Yeah, during the daytime." The other explained. "It depends on where you work too, since the times for the pauses are different. But before 7 pm we get to be outside too."

What he didn't tell was that he loved those small breaks when he was able to go outside and see the sky up above. It made him feel less trapped, and afterwards he felt he was able to live till the next one.

"I see. So we have breaks and something like free time, right?" Kaoru tried to sound as trivial as possible. In reality though, he couldn't wait to smell some fresh air and see the natural light. Those neon lights inside the prison walls hurt his eyes and made everything seem unreal, gave a blurred impression of the things.

"Yeah, something like that." The redhead looked at the other over his shoulder, even smiling a bit. "Although the free time is kinda boring. Nothing much to do here."

"Ah, that's okay." Kaoru nodded and when they stepped through another door, he even smiled at the supervisor who awaited them.

"Die," the man greeted grinning, showing that he was at least missing three teeth. "Who did you bring?"

"He's new, looking for a job." Die informed shortly, nodding towards the other and expecting him to introduce himself properly if he wanted to. "Is there any places left here?"

The man didn't bother to introduce himself and instead scanned Kaoru's appearance thoroughly. Then, he exchanged a few covert glances with the redhead who nodded almost invisibly.

"Okay, it's your lucky day, newbie. Hazuki has been released yesterday and so, his place is free."

Kaoru smiled friendly. "Thank you." He had noticed his cell-mate's approval and thought inwardly, that this probably hadn't been for free.

"I'll show you how it works here." Die promised, still glad that he had something to distract him from the routines for a while. He nodded at the man, before heading into the next room, to get ready to do some work.

There were no guards and Kaoru only spotted one camera this far. A good place to deal, he thought, if one had something to deal with. However, he kept his eyes on Daisuke and followed his orders, trying to memorize his instructions. The work was easy. They had to fold the clean laundry and divide them by sizes and use. That was practically all. In between, they had to empty the huge washing machines and put the laundry into the tumbler, that was it.

The whole work was mechanical, and there weren't even that many people doing it. So it was one of the quietest places in the whole complex. In a way Die enjoyed working there, since it gave him the opportunity to stay away from certain people he didn't want to have anything to do with.

Kaoru was just thinking about nothing, the perfect way to banish all the fears he had developed in such a short amount of time. However, when Die announced that they would take a short break now, he followed him like a stray dog.

Together, they stepped outside into the yard and the black-haired had to shield his eyes from the sun with his hand. He took a deep breath and suddenly felt much more at ease and relaxed than at any moment inside. Quickly, he dug out his cigarettes and thought it would be fair enough to offer the redhead one as well since he had been so kind and even got him the job at the laundry.

Die looked honestly surprised as the other offered him a cigarette. Those things were something you just didn't give away easily, and it had been long since he had one. Nodding thankfully he took it, eyeing it carefully before placing it between his lips. It was a sunny day, but to him it didn't really matter. Outside was always outside.

With a match, Kaoru lit his own cigarette and then held the fire up for the other man to light his. At that moment, he was willing to believe that he was somewhere in a park, enjoying the beautiful day and that the redhead was simply a stranger who had asked him for a smoke.

After taking a long drag, he looked around. There was a corner where some guys were lifting weights, one corner with a basketball court and a place where some guys just hung out. He, however, slowly made his way to an abandoned part and simply sat down in the thin grass that was stubbornly growing there.

For a moment Die stood on the place he was, looking after the other. As he had nothing to do at the moment, he followed the lead and sat himself down near his new cellmate. He didn't say anything though not knowing what he could talk about.

"So, this is what everyday looks like?" Kaoru asked after some time. He wasn't really interested in the answer, simply couldn't bear the silence anymore.

"Basically, yes." The answer came with a nod, and a tiny relieved sigh. "The work ends five thirty, then we eat, then we do whatever we want. At 7 everyone has to be inside."

"How long have you been here?" The question had just slipped Kaoru unintentionally. Before he had been sent to prison, he had made up his mind not to be too blunt, not to sound too interested in others, but the redhead's obvious numbness somehow terrified him. He was simply afraid to become like that soon too.

"A bit more than two months." Die answered vaguely. In reality he knew exactly how many weeks, how many days, how many minutes he had spent there. But that would probably create a too desperate image.

"I see." Kaoru had to admit that the answer terrified him even more than the other's behaviour. Only two months? If one looked at the redhead, one first thought that he was an average guy in his twenties with full cheeks and an obsession to dye his hair. Someone who was easy to hang out and have fun with in real life. But at the second glance, one could clearly see the hollow eyes that somehow made him appear lifeless and didn't give away anything of his true nature.

"And how long do you have to stay?" Came the second unintentional question before Kaoru could stop himself.

Die swallowed at the question, counting the time he still had to do. "Still almost 18 months to go." Although, he tried to look like it didn't bother him, tried to be cool, somehow one still could see from his appearance how much that bothered him. "So I'm only at the beginning."

This time, Kaoru managed to swallow the question for the reason why the redhead had to do so much time. Instead, he took another drag from his cigarette and just nodded. He had noticed the slight uncomfortableness his question had caused, saw the other's body tense and thus remained silent.

The redhead had noticed his own reaction, and cursed himself inwardly for that. He knew he shouldn't show how it bothered him, but for a straightforward guy like him it was difficult.

"I guess our time's up," the smaller man announced finally.

Kaoru didn't show that he had noticed and just wanted to help Die a bit with his reaction. For some reason, he felt pity for him and that fact alone wanted to make him hit himself. It was still his first day and yet, he had broken already more than one rule he had set for himself.

"Yup, better head back." Die stood up, waiting for the other to get up too before heading towards the door and back to their laundry.

Back inside, they were quietly doing their work, both of them lost in deep thoughts. It wasn't uncomfortable though for it was the first time since he had set foot in this building that Kaoru was relaxed and didn't have the feeling that somebody could attack him any minute. Working with Die was easy and it went hand in hand without them needing to talk about it.

Inwardly Die was thinking about the reason why the other was there, and what kind of guy he really was. He didn't dare to ask though, but stored the questions to be asked later in case he didn't find them out anyways. He liked the other man in a way though, and thought it was good to have him as a cellmate instead of some other prisoners.

Their silent working was interrupted every now and then by the appearance of another inmate who came to collect some clean sheets or clothes. But Kaoru didn't talk to them more than necessary, although he was always friendly and nice. However, at one point, they were having a short break, waiting for the washing machine to finish, he addressed Die again.

"Say, do they have books here? Some kind of library or so?"

"A small one." The redhead shrugged, wondering where that question came from. "We're allowed to go there during breaks and so. Why?" He couldn't hold back the question, and looked at the other curiously. "You a reader?"

"Yeah." Kaoru nodded and had to smile due to the other's obvious confusion because of that question. "I like a good book from time to time and just thought that it's a good way to kill some time in here."

"You just have to go there and see what they've got." Die nodded as well, looking a tiny bit embarrassed on his side. "I've never been one to read much."

"You should." The black-haired man grinned. "I could recommend you some books." He shook his head a bit and averted his gaze in order not to let the other see his amusement.

"I guess that'd be okay. I don't have that much to do here anyways, with the free time I mean." The redhead leaned against the nearest wall, eyeing the other carefully. Something in him made him look like reading suited him, something like cleverness or so, as Die couldn't quite place it.

Kaoru cast a glance at the clock on the wall and his smile faded instantly. It was time for lunch and although he was hungry, he wasn't eager to go to the cafeteria that would be filled with all the other inmates as well. But then, he thought he might get the opportunity to find out who belonged to his gang and talk to them. He knew that protection would be vital in a place like this.

"Should we get something to eat?" he asked, assuming that Die would accompany him. For some reason, he really wanted the other to come along and not to leave him alone. Another rule of his he had already broken. Never trust anybody.

Die nodded, before crouching down in front of the washing machine. "Yeah, but let's put these into the dryer first." It made him smile a tiny bit, to have someone to go to the dining-room with, as usually he always had went there alone.

They took the laundry off and stuffed it into the dryer, before heading towards the cafe, Die again leading the way. For Kaoru, it was a comfortable thought not to have to go alone and although Die had been there only for two months, he knew how things worked.

The place was crowded with people already and the groups that had built there were clearly visible. Inwardly, Kaoru asked himself if there was something like a boss in this place. Someone whom it would be good to have as a friend rather than an enemy. He stored that question somewhere in the back of his mind, grabbed a tray and queued, anxious not to accidentally bump into anybody before him.

The food was an undefined mass, but it was edible and that was the main thing. During these two months in prison Die had noticed that every once in a while the food was good, and other days you couldn't even tell what it was by the looks.

He was searching for a table where there wouldn't be too many people yet, and settled for one that had a couple of free seats in the end. Kaoru followed him and casually sat down, his eyes fastened on his food. It smelled and looked rather disgustingly and when he tried it, he found out that it tasted just as bad. Every bite, he downed together with a sip of his water, only chewing as much as needed. It was clearly visible that he didn't enjoy eating while Die only shovelled the food down, without his expression giving away at all if he liked it or not. It was always the same and one got numbed by the taste rather soon.

Kaoru used the moment to carefully glance around from the corner of his eye and measure the other inmates. The guys who were sitting with them didn't seem to belong to any kind of group and thus, were either losers or newbies, unprotected game just like himself and probably Die too. Some tables were crowded with fearsome looking, muscled guys who seemed to have gotten too much testosterone.

Quickly, he finished his food, but made sure not to be quicker or slower than the redhead while trying to still act natural. After finishing eating Die got up, took his tray to the place where those were supposed to be left.

As it still was about ten minutes before the lunchbreak ended, he decided to go outside for a second, to get some fresh air or something. Carefully he avoided looking at certain tables, knowing it would only cause troubles.

In passing-by, Kaoru noticed a small group of men who could belong to his clan. He even thought he recognized one or two faces. However, he didn't dare to talk to them right away and simply followed the redhead outside where he sat down a few paces away from him, looking up into the sky. Although he craved for a cigarette again, he denied himself from smoking, trying to ration the few he had.

Die was leaning against the wall, turning his face up towards the sky and inhaled deeply. He simply tried to somehow suck energy from the sun, to help him cope with yet another day.

Kaoru caught himself staring at the fences, trying to find an easy way to escape. He knew it was stupid since he only had to do 13 months and that was considered a piece of cake. Besides, his boss had promised to bail him out soonest and he simply had to survive a couple of weeks. After some moments the redhead straightened again with a small sigh, and headed back inside.

"Back to work." He mentioned shortly in passing by, but didn't look back to see if the other followed or not.

Kaoru startled when he was addressed, but didn't follow instantly. He waited till Die had left inside and then slowly got up. After all, he didn't want to give the impression to be the other's puppy dog. One or two minutes after the redhead, he entered the laundry.

The fresh air outside had felt good, but now being back inside this muggy prison made enduring it even worse. Besides, the fact that there was nobody to whom he could actually talk without keeping up his facade bothered him quite a lot already.

Again they didn't talk much, and only went back to work silently. The time passed surprisingly fast though, as they had something to do at least. At one point Die caught himself thinking again how it was kind of comforting not to be alone, although they weren't exactly friends or anything.

Even after their time was done, they remained there for a moment, cleaning up and storing everything away neatly. Everything just not to have too much spare time to kill before the closing of the cell doors and shut down.

"Could you tell me the way to the library?" Kaoru finally asked just before they left the laundry.

"Sure." Die nodded. As they reached the end of the corridor he pointed to one direction. "There. The third door if I remember right."

With raised eyebrows and a nod, Kaoru thanked him for the information and went into the pointed direction. He didn't look back and kept his eyes locked straight at the door that would lead him to the library.

For some time Die looked after the other, a part of him wanting to follow. Eventually he turned though, and headed back to his cell.

The guy who worked in the library seemed to be at least a hundred years old. He was nice and knew all the books by heart as it seemed. Kaoru went for an extremely thick novel and another book about history. As the man reminded him that he only had a week to read them, he shrugged.

"No problem. I will bring them back in three or four days." The man shook his head chuckling but gave him both books and then turned back to his coffee and the magazine he was reading. Since Kaoru didn't know what else to do he went back to his cell, hoping to bump into one of his gang members.

Die had gone outside for some time, but as it had been cloudy and started to rain he reluctantly returned back inside. He wandered slowly along the corridors, hoping not to bump into anyone he was trying to avoid.

Just when Kaoru turned into the corridor that led to his cell, he noticed the familiar guy he had seen at lunch. He gathered his courage and stopped the man, addressing him quietly in the common way of his clan.

The man grinned and arched an eyebrow. "I know you. You're the book keeper, right?"

Relieved that he had been recognized, Kaoru nodded. "Yes. The boss told me to contact you guys in here. He will bail me out soon..."

Takuya, the gangmember, roared with laughter, throwing his head back hardly able to control himself. The reaction made Kaoru nervous and he bit his lip. Was the guy mocking him?

"And now you think we babysit you in here? Forget it. In this place, you have to earn your respect just like everyone else." He lowered his voice, becoming dead serious at a moment's notice. "Besides, nobody will bail you out. I heard that you fucked up. Too stupid to even keep the books right." With having said that, he left Kaoru standing alone and joined a group of guys ahead of them.

On his way back to the cell Die heard some familiar voices in the corridor just around the corner and for some reason he stopped to listen. He almost held his breath to hear what was going on. Apparently his new cell mate was talking with this one guy he knew by name only, and they seemed to know each other.

Knowing enough about the rival gangs the redhead was instantly able to recognize to which one they belonged. He didn't wait to hear the rest of the conversation though, not wanting to get caught listening. So he headed quickly back to the cell.

His face petrified not to give away the fear that had taken over him, Kaoru entered the cell, hardly sparing the other man a glance. He quickly climbed his bunk and opened the novel. But his mind was occupied otherwise and he just couldn't focus and had to read the first paragraph for twenty times before he finally closed the book again and stared at the ceiling.

This had turned out completely different than expected and than he had been promised. However, he would just have to survive alone until he got bailed out, if Takuya hadn't told the truth and he got bailed out after all, he thought, trying to encourage himself.

Die had lain down on his bunk, staring at the opposite wall again. Now that he knew that the other man was of a rival gang he knew he shouldn't be so friendly with him technically. What surprised him though, was that he couldn't bring himself to care. This was a whole other world anyways, with its own rules and one who was a friend outside the walls turned to an enemy inside. So why not the other way around too?

Desperation had seeped into Kaoru's consciousness even though he fought it hard. He knew that he was only a book keeper, far from being a hitman which was what he had wanted to become once. And although he was strong willed and kinda tough, he feared being imprisoned here without backup.

The redhead in the bunk underneath seemed to be at least kind and no real threat, but he wasn't sure if he could be trusted. However, Kaoru promised to himself that he would earn the respect of his other inmates and find his place within a group to survive until his release.

A long moment they spent in silence, but finally Die couldn't take it anymore for some reason. He knew the other was awake, by the sounds of him moving in the bunk, so he spoke up.

"Found interesting books?" His voice wasn't loud, but enough to be heard.

"I think so." Slowly, Kaoru rolled to the edge of his bed and looked down at the other. "Want one?" He offered Die a look at the novel and the book about European history.

"I don't think so." Die offered the other a tiny smile. "Too difficult for me, I think."

With a shrug, Kaoru stored the books on his bed again, but remained in his current position, eying the redhead for a moment. He didn't look like a dumb person and Kaoru couldn't help the impression that this was just part of his facade.

Although this was only his second night there, he was already bored to death and desperate enough to ask. "Do you have cards?"

"No." The redhead shrugged. "But I guess one can borrow those from the library as well or something."

"What the fuck are you doing here alone all night?" The question had just slipped the black-haired man and he cursed himself right after he had asked it. It showed too much of his current state of mind.

"Nothing." There was something helpless in Die's eyes even, as he answered honestly. "Think. Sleep. Sometimes go to the library and read something that doesn't force me to think. Or then go outside if it's not too late yet."

"Gods." Kaoru turned on his back again, staring at the ceiling that seemed to come closer and closer the longer he looked at it.

That made the redhead sit up in his bunk, and sigh a bit. "Look, this isn't any fun fair or anything. And there isn't that much to do. We can ask at the library for the cards if you want to." He didn't even notice he spoke as 'we', in a way assuming they would spend more time together.

"I know that this isn't a playschool." The other spoke towards the ceiling, but kept his voice firm and low. "And there's no need to do me a favor. I can very well remain lying here with you and stare holes into the air." He hadn't intended to sound so sarcastic, but just couldn't help it.

"Whatever." Die was neither in the mood to start arguing with the other nor felt like defending himself. He had offered to play with Kaoru but obviously he didn't want to. So he lay down again, turning his face towards the wall.

With a small sound of his disapproval, Kaoru turned around and pulled the blanket over his head. He just didn't want to hear or see anything of this room anymore. Under the cover, in the leaden darkness, he could imagine that he was lying in his comfortable bed next to his girlfriend who would prepare a nice breakfast for them in the morning.

Die had told the truth, there wasn't really much to do. He had developed a habit to sleep a lot more than he needed, since it was a way to make time pass quickly. So it didn't even take long and he was slowly drifting off already.

Kaoru meanwhile couldn't sleep. There were too many thoughts running through his head as he wasn't used to be pent-up in such a small room. Slowly, he was becoming claustrophobic and bit his lip hard not just to start crying over his misery. Sometime in the early morning hours, he finally fell asleep, too exhausted to bother for the threatening noises that reached his ears from the other cells.